50+ community Weekend Check-in June 5-7, 2020
Hello everyone in the 50+ community, I hope youre all doing well and wish you a wonderful weekend 
Things go wrong, we all know that. 
It happened to most of us. Despite our best intentions, something goes dreadfully wrong, we make a mistake and start suffering, our mind cries, Wait. What?
Next time this happens ask yourself: What can I learn from this? What do I need right now?
When you make your mind treat every negative situation as a lesson to learn in life, you will be able to have a positive life. 
What is something helpful you learned from a recent experience?
Im stronger because of the hard times, wiser because of my mistakes, and happier because I have known sadness. ~Unknown
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I learned that solutions could be more simple than my hasty steps.
@DinaElwy wow that is a nice insight.
@amiablePeace77 I learned that even when there is confusion and problems all around me, I can still rest in a quiet place and let the dust settle and just get back to feeling good about this moment. Sometimes just a taste of this moment is enough to escape from this world for a little bit.
Thanks for this post.
@soulsings
Nice if someone can appreciate the very little things, moments, not expecting to be it all the time like this. 
@amiablePeace77, I had an appointment with my therapist yesterday. I was so tired that I didn't express myself well. The result is that I think it was a wasted session. I learned that I have to talk to him about my sleeping and health issues again. I think he forgets how much my sleep and physical health issues effect me.
@purpleTree4652 I am sorry you feel you had a wasted session. I go with notes and things to talk about rather than hope I am tuned in in the moment.
@soulsings, i never said that i didn't go with notes. you're reading in to what I said.
@purpleTree4652 sorry I misread what you meant.
@soulsings, thank you. that's ok.
I've learned not to make open-ended promises.
@stressBear I hear you. Rather qualified answers based on conditions at the time.
My mistake I keep repeating is telling people how I feel. People say "reach out" but they don't mean it and get upset if you do. They offer you "solutions" treat you like you're "not even trying" act judgmental and tell you to " go to therapy and call a doctor" as if you havrr et not been doing that constantly for years . Nobody understands that there is treatment resistant depression. No one understands that some people just cannot get better and that's the way it is and they just want support . How can people participate in suicide and depression awareness activities like walking 5k for it but get tired of hearing about the same person still being depressed? And just say go to a hospital. They don't know what happens at the hospital. Many people are not admitted or they get an overnight observation, are released with no follow up and no changes. Just a big $ bill for being babysat. But it's seen as a stupid problem for defective people. All that matters now is whether you're protesting or not for BLM. If I'm not participating in protesting, I've been called a racist.
I have to learn to keep all my thoughts and feelings to myself unless I'm talking to a doctor once a month and even then I have to be carreful. That's the lesson I have learned. I have to cut myself off from everyone; so-called "friends" because they get offended that their helpful suggestions are not helpful. "Leave your spouse" "go to the hospital". They don't know the consequences or damages that would cause. No one understands or really cares about me. If they care, the way they show it makes me feel worse. I don't deserve to be here. Being pitied is the closest I can get to being cared about or having friendship. It's not an acceptable substitute . Pity is humiliating.
that's what I've learned. To shut up and pretend to be happy or just disappear from interacting with others.
@HappyDucky8 yes others do not understand and so not telling them is wise.
when I was working I never talked about the struggles I had but did stay connected through small talk. In many ways, 7cups is a place I can talk about what bothers me.
@soulsings
i mean even here and places like this, I absolutely cannot and it saddens me so much I've cried all day
I've learned that I still have a backbone. I thought for some reason have I kept bowing down to everyone, but I don't. It's only some people and I can still fight back when needed.
@Goldcherry2113 good for you. A root.
What is something helpful you learned from a recent experience? I learned that taking my fiance out to a park put her in a much better mood all day. I wasn't expecting that.
@Offmytrack
Offmytrack, nice, seems it's worthwhile to make it a routine, go there more often . I love park walks too, nature is always a great healer to me.
@amiablePeace77 Yes, park walks are nice, I was pushing her around in her wheelchair, a little bit tiring.
@Offmytrack I've done that with my wife. It's fun. Tiring, as you say, but so worth it.
Nothing will ever make me happy
@HappyDucky8 I am sorry you feel so down about it happy.
I think for me is I find I get temporary happiness. A meal, an exercise class, practicing mindfulness, going for a walk. These all help me for a short time. But then I have to do something else to try to get back to calm.
For me, I can accept that all conditions change and so I try to be content with the present moment rather than expecting I will be happy all the time. For me life is a mixture of sadness and happiness, joy and sorrow, fulfillment and emptiness. I always come back to my own version of the Serenity Prayer
To change the things I can, to accept the things I can't as being unchangeable and to know which one I am dealing with when I have an experience.
