50's Plus Check in thread July 30 to August 5
How's it going everyone? We are so glad that this 50+ subcommunity is growing and hoping for lots of possibilities in the future. Since we are in the middle of changes let's talk about what have we noticed in our life this week that we would like to change for the better in our lives to be more mindful, to help others out, to relieve stress in our lives or to even have more fun?
What I am changing is I went to the Senior Center last Friday and discovered several things that I can participate in and noticed they even have a pinochle day which I love playing that game so excited to start doing that again on a regular basis and get to know others in the community. I am also volunteering more at the local food bank which is great exercise also.
If you have not already done so, please submit this short form add or remove your name: https://tinyurl.com/ybyg3g3y
@1Marg1 @amiablePeace77 @BeyondTheInvisible @Charlie40 @DanaMH @dapperdime @FlowerLily23 @GuardianAngel77 @GusteeMoon123 @inventivehouse2965 @JolivetteListens @Lauren63 @Nova101 @pamharley003 @quietSail6485 @soulsings @Tom444 @Tyedyedbutterfly
@DanaMH
The change that I would like to make is to reduce my social anxiety to a level that is at least manageable if not altogether eliminated. I fear that's a big project, perhaps overly ambitious, but I need to try it anyway. Right now, it's so bad I can't even bring myself to type into a discussion forum. But, when a person starts at the bottom, the only place left to go is up. So I'll see.
@Tom444
Hello Tom, sorry to hear that social anxiety is giving you an hard time.
See if that thread can help, click it HERE
You sound to be willing to overcome it tho, so that is positive and I am sure step by step things can be done if you will not give up! 
Take care!
@BeyondTheInvisible
Hi,
Nice to meet you! 😊😊!
@Tom444
Hi Tom, that is great that you would like to reduce your social anxiety. If you ever would like me to jump into a chat room with you so we can just bounce things back and forth or even in a 1;1 I am open to that if I am not busy. You are doing great checking in on the forum today so proud of you.
I also lead on Wednesday's at 10am EDT an Anxiety led discussion in the Anxiety room and there are other times available also on the calendar if that time doesn't work for you that my team mates have their discussions.
@DanaMH
Thank you. My schedule is kind of crazy right now, but either the chatroom or a 1:1 sounds good to me. As soon as I have a better idea of how the next few days are playing out, I'll message you with dates/times that would work for me so you can see if any work for you. If not this time around, then perhaps the next. All the best.
@Tom444
sounds good
@Tom444
Hang in there Tom, I hope things go right on up as soon as they can.
@Tom444
this is my first post in the forums, but i just wanted to say that you did good in the Office today, and i look forward to getting to know you better... i have a whole page of 'Coping Mechanisms' for anxiety and other strong emotions, that i will try to post in here somewhere~
disoriented a bit at the moment.. hope to see you again soon~!
@GusteeMoon123
Thanks for the words of encouragement. Please let me know where you post the coping mechanisms for anxiety as I'm sure I can put them to good use.
I look forward to getting to know you better, too.
See you around.
@Tom444
here are some of the Coping Skills i learned for managing anxiety, and found to work well for stress AND PTSD~ i hope you find some of them useful ~
Self Comforting Skills
we are social creatures, but getting what we need when we need it from another is not always available. here are some of the suggestions from the DBT handbook on Self Soothing Skills:
think of soothing each of your FIVE SENSES
1) Vision: Notice what you see, find soothing things to look at.
(i go to a blog that has lovely pictures: C PTSD - A Way Out | A place to check in daily )
2) Hearing: Pay attention to what you can hear around you.
(put on your favorite music...)
3) Smell: Be aware of the memories that smell can bring.
(i like to do aroma therapy. there are many Essential Oils for that.)
4) Taste: Carefully savor flavors that the day brings you.
(keep a favorite hard candy on hand, for the little sugar boost, too.)
5) Touch: Find comfort in touch.
(keep a special pillow or blanket with a favorite perfume on it.) Dialectical Behavioral Therapy Workbook
these are not listed, but i find them handy, too:
A) Reassurance: Tell yourself that you are OK, safe and unharmed.
(the danger is past, you have survived this before and now
you are stronger and more skillful than then.)
B) Take Action: Go for a walk, or exercise or clean house or cook. (use your
body's natural focusing powers to leave the fear behind.)
C) Refocus: Think about pleasant things. Push the hurtful thoughts away.
(have a hobby or a story, or a book that you like, to take your
mind to a better place.)
Coping With Anxiety and Panic:
1. Remember, feelings of panic are just exaggerations of normal bodily stress reactions.
2. Sensations are neither harmful nor dangerous - just unpleasant. Nothing worse will happen.
3. Anxiety is temporary. Instead of fighting it, relax into it. Just let it be.
4. Focus on facing the fear rather than trying to avoid it or escape from it.
5. Stop adding to the panic with frightening thoughts of where panic will lead.
6. Stay in the present. Be aware of what is happening to you rather than concern yourself with how much worse it might get.
7. Notice that when you stop adding to panic with frightening thoughts, the fear begins to fade.
8. Wait and give the fear time to pass.
9. Look around you. Plan what you will do next as the panic subsides.
10. When you are ready to go on, do so in an easy, relaxed manner. There is no hurry.
11. Think about the progress made so far despite all the difficulties.
Some Specific Actions:
1. Manage your breathing, if it is rapid, breathe into a paper sack to lower oxygen uptake;
2. Count your breaths, 1001, 1002, 1003, ect, up to 1020, then start again, slow down the count to slow your heartbeat. counting interferes with anxiety;
3. Delay doing anything about your anxiety or panic, just follow the steps and focus on getting thru it;
4. Distract yourself, with anything that requires you to focus and is simple and handy - at home you might read something easy, like a magazine, or knit or wash dishes, whatever engages your attention;
5. Eat something to replenish the blood sugars that adrenalin has burned up, and give yourself at least 15 minutes for the kidneys to clean out the 'ashes' in your blood;
6. Write these things down and keep them with you, until you have made them a habit
practice these skills before you need them, or when you are just mildly anxious, so they will be familiar when you are feeling very upset. i hope you find this information helpful~
best wishes~
Gus
@GusteeMoon123
Great coping skills! 😊😊!
Thank you very much for sharing this with us! 😊😊
@GusteeMoon123
Thank you Gus. Those suggestions are great. I copied your text and pasted it into a Notepad document on my laptop so I have this information handy.
All the best,
Tom
@Tom444
You are strong!!
@GusteeMoon123
Hi Gus - A couple of great places for those resources would be in the Anxiety forum at: https://www.7cups.com/forum/AnxietySupportCommunity_53/AnxietySupportResources_412/ or the 35+ Selfcare Corner so everyone that is 35 and older can also use which is at: https://www.7cups.com/forum/35OverCommunity_166/35SelfcareCorner_1502/
Thanks in advance for helping others with new resources that will help folks on 7cups.
@GusteeMoon123
That's great! When you do post it I'll be getting them to!
Thank you for sharing this! 😊😊!
@GusteeMoon123
Hi,
Nice to meet you! 😊😊!
How was your day?
@DaveMcGrath
Hi,
How are you doing tonight? 😊😊!
@GuardianAngel77
just woke, I will shortly be taking my dog out for his morning walk, pick up something to eat, and then getting to work. Need to find out why the drivers on a possibly counterfiet graphics card I bought from a vendor off Taobao (chinese ebay) aren't installing properly. If the card is counterfiet, I'll need to reflash the bios with a correct version.
It's a GTS450, ancient as it came out years ago. What I can't figure out is why someone would go through all the trouble to make a new version of such an old design with some improvements.
So probably will have to take it apart to get actual numbers off parts to google them to find out more.
After that, gotta go to the bank to exchange some money from Chinese to US dollars. I fly back to the US to meet my niece for the first time next week. Will also be catching up with friends and family whilst home. Upon concluding my visit to the bank, i will go visit a chap who does repairs on motherboards and see if he can be bothered to trace an issue with an older motherboard I have for a reasonable price. If the cost of the repair is more than the motherboard, I may well be forced to part ways with it. Once finished with that, back home for more dogwalking, and then off to work for my 1 class of the day. It's my 4 year old class. 30 minutes of over-energetic bouncing around and I'm out the door. Meeting up with friends for chinese style bbq, called Shaokao. More dogwalking to follow, with maybe an hour or two of Fallout 3 before the dog's last trip out before bed.
@DaveMcGrath
Ooooo going to meet your niece for the
first time. That's really neat! Coming to the
USA. Have a great flight and trip. That Chinese barbecue
Sounds really good. I might have to try this! 😊😊😊😊😊!!
Have a great day! 😊😊😊!
@GuardianAngel77
I don't think I've ever seen it outside of china, at least not in the way the chinese do it. But if you can find it, go with friends, plan not to walk home, plan to crawl home. It's great food and fun times.
@DaveMcGrath
OK thanks
@DaveMcGrath sorry you got a graphics card problem may need to get new driver. Hope you have good visit with niece.
@soulsings
driver is fine, the card is a fake I bought off Chinese ebay. I kind of knew it was a fake, which is why its so intruiging. 30 dollars spent, many hours of head scratching and testing to follow. So I'll get my money back and more.
@Tom444
Sorry to here that you are having problems with
Social anxiety . That can be difficult for you!
We support you! 😊😊!!
We are here for you! 😊😊😊!
@Tom444
Hi
Nice to meet you. 😊😊😊!
Glad that you are here! 😊😊!
@Tom444
Hi Tom. I post to express support and encouragement. You are brave. Be well.
@WorthyStruggle
That is so awesome that you are posting to express support and encouragement for others.
@DanaMH
Thanks for the thread Dana!!
Happy monday!
@DanaMH glad you discovered the senior center. In our state you can go to any senior center in the state so I search online for ___insert town or city and state____ Senior Center Newsletter PDF and I get the activity newsletter for any town in my area. I do weight and flexibility and stability training, Tai Chi, Yoga, and grief and loss.
Thanks for doing this checkin.
@soulsings
That sounds like you have a lot of centers in your area. I didn't think about getting on like an email address for the city. I will have to look into that tomorrow for their updates.
@soulsings
Hi,
How are you doing tonight? 😊😊😊!
Hi everyone, can you just let me know who is (are) running the 50+ community forum at the moment?
@Charlie40 I guess the best answer is we are in flux but I am very committed to the 50+ Community. Feel free to PM me or any of the other people starting threads in here.
@Charlie40
Hi,
Nice to meet you. I seen you around but
never introduced myself to you. 😊😊😊!
Glad to meet you. 😊😊😊!
Have a great day!
@Charlie40
Howdy m'lad. :P
Howdy DanaMH, i see you got the thread pinned. Keep up your good work, I'm very happy you are going to be part of this team.
@DaveMcGrath
Thanks Dave
@DaveMcGrath I am happy @DanaMH is here they are such a self starter!
@soulsings
Thanks
What I willbe changing is feeling less guilty about my "guilty pleasure"- gaming. I have been a gamer since the 80's and I sometimes feel bad about it because I am so old.
@JolivetteListens
Even old folks play games. Maybe you can just do less hours? I know I am playing the Wii Fit more which is exercise at the same time.
@DanaMH The hours are the constant fight with hubby (non-gamer). lol
@JolivetteListens
Our's is who is going to have the big TV in the living room. LOL
@DanaMH tehehehe yeah that too
@DanaMH
Oh no a giant TV 📺 📺
in the livingroom. LOL😂 😂 😂 !
@JolivetteListens
Lol Jolivette!
Well... a pastime is good when we feel it as to be good, so ... keep on playing! 
i like to travel the world on my computer... i watch documentaries, and look up places in other cities... i have a great fondness for both horticulture, nature and architecture... i also have a long history of working in 'peer-support' communities, and a vast and varied education.
i hope i can be of help to others, and get a laugh or two a day... i also love to post pictures of interesting (to me) things for others to enjoy.
@GusteeMoon123
That all sounds so amazing and I also enjoy the different countries that are in movies which show off the different parts of the world that we don't get to visit in real life.
@GusteeMoon123
Oh that's really neat that you do that on
the computer. Travel different places and learn about them and you like to post pictures at really neat.
😊😊😊😊!
@BeyondTheInvisible. Will do.
@JolivetteListens
Nice! Well... if you feel to then you can also share your favorite video-games or your scores?
Cheers!
@BeyondTheInvisible HA! My favorite game is Plants vs Zombies Garden Warfare 1 & 2
Howeveeeer, I am just starting a game called Fortnite and boy is it awesome!!!
@JolivetteListens
Ah Jolivette! You must be an expert then!
I am not good at video games but there was a time i liked to play something I had in my cell mostly during travel to go to office...it's not a video game but ya... LOL
@BeyondTheInvisible Oh, no. The great part is that I am soooooo bad at it that is is just hilarious. The kids get so mad at me sometimes. tehehehe
@JolivetteListens
Oh no a game person too!😱😱😰! LOL 😂 😂 😂!!
I love playing games to!
I have to check these out!
@JolivetteListens
That's good that you play games. 😊😊😊!
@JolivetteListens
Hi
Nice to meet you! 😊😊😊!
@GuardianAngel77 Pleased to meet you, too!
@JolivetteListens
Thank you! 😊😊😊😊!
@DanaMH
Hi,
How are you doing today! 😊😊!
@GuardianAngel77
I am having thoughts maybe the realization finally hit that my son will be leaving in 11.5 months for basic training and my kids will both be out of the house. At least I have those months with him while he is still a SR in high school.
@DanaMH
Yes you still have that time with him.
It will be difficult for you. You will miss him. You have.
support here when you need it. And the house
Will feel empty. You will go through many different
emotions. You will make it through this. Sending
Comfort your way. Sending you safe gentle hugs to you
if you want them. 🙆🙆🙆🙆💖💖💖💖!
@GuardianAngel77
Thanks
@DanaMH
😆😆!
welcome any time!
@DanaMH How do you get your kids to move out😀
Hi everyone - the change I made this week was to join 7 Cups. Just joined yesterday. So far it looks like a great place to make friends, help others and relieve some of my own stress and loneliness along the way. Was excited to find this forum for those of us in our 50's.
@amusingJet302
So glad that you found 7cups and welcome to the app. Please explore and ask questions and everyone will help you out.
@amusingJet302
Hi,.
Welcome to 7Cups. Glad that you joined the
50 ➕ community!😊😊😊😊!
Yes you will find ways to relieve your
stress. You have support here.
@amusingJet302
Hello! Welcome aboard, we are glad to have you joined!
Wish you to fnd here thhe support you are looking for and in case you want to be updated about new threads of the 50+ please appy to this form and we will add you in the tagging list : https://tinyurl.com/ybyg3g3y
Take care!
I am away for Friday and Saturday but will pop on when I get home.
@soulsings
OK. Thank you for sharing this with us! 😊😊😊!
Take care! 😊😊😊! See you when you get back! 😊😊!
@soulsings
Safe travels! 😊😊😊!
@soulsings
Have fun and thanks for letting us know.
@DanaMH you are welcome
@soulsings
Be safe, take care!
@soulsings have fun and be safe.
@DanaMH
Really glad to see this! thank you Dana!!!