Hello! Been a long time since I was here last.
I'm not sure why but I decided to come back to this forum and check it out again. I used to come here quite often but life situation has changed and just didn't feel the need to come here much.
I still battle with occasional depression now and then. But I try to keep busy with life hoping it would keep my mind off things.
Life certainly has its challenges that's for sure. Sometimes it's hard to navigate through some of them.
If anyone needs a friend who wants to connect and to have someone to talk to let me know. 🙂
@Spearman60 @Spearman60 Hey, I'm new here-as a last resort to feeling a bit better. Had a long-term relationship that fell apart 5 months ago. I'm struggling with moving forward, and letting go. (it's strange to connect with random strangers, but I read your post and can relate to it.) Happy to chat!
Thanks for responding. Hope you do better day by day. I know relationships are hard. 😊
@Spearman60
Glad to know you are doing well I remember when you were on here before.
Yeah I remember you! 😊
How you been? Hope things are going better for you! 😊
@Spearman60
things are much the same for me
although i know now it is not me but some around me who refuse to grow or change.
@Spearman60 Welcome back!
Thanks! 😊
@crystaldawn76
@Amanda84 Thank you Amanda. Not going to lie, I have been a bit lost lately
@crystaldawn76
Sorry to hear that, I hope you get through this, here for you, I definitely noticed and missed your presence here 💚
I'm just now getting back to this thread that I started. Earlier this year I lost both my parents 2 weeks apart and it was devastating. I hadn't been back here since until now.
It's been a struggle and battling depression now and then and grief and heartache. I have to say this is the toughest time of my life right now.
I still wish my marriage was better. It's not 100%, but I guess no marriages are. But the best way I could describe it is that it's barely surviving on oxygen. I wish there could be more to it but it just doesn't seem to work out that way. It takes both people to make it really work well and we just can't seem to get it together on a level that it should be.
Anyway I was hesitant to even post anything but I thought I would anyway.
@Spearman60
I'm so sorry for your loss 😔💛
I cannot imagine how difficult that must have been.
And still is.
I'm sorry that your marriage is strained, but I hope that slowly things get better for you 💛
Thanks. What makes it harder dealing with the loss of my parents is her passiveness. Her whole family is like that, so it just her nature. It's a problem I've dealt with in her for many years throughout our marriage. I've never understood it since I've always been a person of empathy towards others. But I'll admit, I've had less empathy for others in recent years. Sitting back and watching the world get more and more selfish doesn't help. Like someone told me once, "People aren't against you, they are just for themselves." How true that is! 🙂
Also, as far as working through my grief after losing my parents, a part of me wants to get through it and get past it, then another part of me wants to feel it. Does that even make sense?
I still want to feel some of the heartache and the sadness because it lets me know that I truly love them and cared for them very deeply. I mean I know it's always going to be with me for the rest of my life.
But there's comfort in knowing that they are in heaven now. They're not suffering anymore through the physical issues that they had. And I know someday I'll see them again. That brings comfort.
I hope I'm making sense here. 🙂
@Spearman60
Grief comes in all forms, and no one does it the same. It is hard and really does not go away even small things remind us. It is very hard when we need our spouse to step up on things and they are sort of not there for us the way we want. You know I understand that.
Take your time with the grief. remember the good times minimize any bad times and appreciate them. finding someone else to talk to sometimes helps instead of a spouse who head nods or tunes us out.
Yeah I just wished I had friend that I could really connect with and confide in.
I've had people tell me how to grieve, but the thing of it is no one can tell you how to grieve, we all grieve differently.
This is one of the hardest things I've been through other than the challenges I've had in our marriage.
It's been 4 months now since both my parents passed. And it's still hard. I guess it will always be that way. It's a lot different when it's your parents that's gone.
@Spearman60
Welcome back.
I'm so sorry to hear about your parents, what a difficult time, especially to lose them both so close together.
@Spearman60
wb to cups