Holidays and other things
Hi I’m new here. It’s holiday season and I am lonely. I live alone with two cats. I’m 59 female. Retired. Widowed for 12 years.
The holidays are such a source of loneliness and stress. At the same time one of my cats is not well. This adds even more to the stress.
I really have only one friend. Though we’ve known each other from having worked at the same place in the past we were never close. I can’t share my feelings with her at this time. I think over time we may become closer friends. I hope so.
I don’t know how to make friends. Now with COVID I feel even more alone. Not that I can really think of what I would be doing if there was no COVID.
I suffer from depression and anxiety. I am under a doctor’s care. While I have talked with a therapist it does not really seem to help. I think I need more of a personal connection with someone to talk to.
I really don’t know what to do. Since I don’t celebrate the holidays there’s nothing I can do to make me feel better in that regard.
If you read this far - thank you. I’m sure I’m not alone with the loneliness in general and specific to the holidays.
@reservedTalker8217
Hi there, dealing with anxiety and depression is tough particularly during holidays. Many people suffer from the Holiday Blues but it can make it harder for those living with mental illnesses. Sorry to hear that on top of this you're worried about your cat, I hope your cat will recover soon. 7cups is always open, so also during the holidays. Have you thought about coming here, joining an event to connect with others or just browse for a listener to get a 1:1 chat? https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/. This is a link to our self help guides https://www.7cups.com/supportGuides/selfHelpGuides.php
I hope that your friend and you will become closer and you will find it easier to share your feelings.
Thanks for speaking so honestly. The holidays for a lot of people are a hard time and I can’t even imagine with a pandemic going on. If you’d ever like to have someone to talk to about how your days been going (anything rly) please feel free to message me 😌
Hey!
Losing your other half is probably one of the most difficult things to go through.
Having only one work friend can be a blessing but it also can be challenging to only have one person to rely on.
COVID isolation only intensifies our negative emotions.
I can relate to all of the above.
I recommend you shut the world out, shut off your phone (if you can) shut off your TV or at least the toxic news, don’t check email if you can. Lots of time work gets in the way of doing all of this.
and take the day to celebrate yourself. Self Care, relax, enjoy, shut out the world and enjoy yourself. Maybe that means binge watching movies in your PJs or taking a long bath or going to get your nails done or taking a hike or checking out a cool museum event go see a movie.
you don’t need other people to celebrate with just celebrate all of the wonderful things you are.
If you are looking for real life connections
try online dating Maybe- out yourself out in the dating world again
join a meet up group. Meet up.com
https://www.meetup.com/topics/over-60-social-club/
Or join a church - they are very into developing relationships with the community
also there are tons of communities for your hobbies like if you like outdoor activities like hiking you can go to a website like REI and sign up to go for a hike with like minded folk of all ages. Most of the activities are outside anyway so it’s not heavily affected by Covid
Also the majority of people I know who retired or are making plans for retirement- still work part time after being retired. The structure and accountability is something we all crave.
Consider getting another part time job in a job you are excited about that maybe could never do before such as arranging flowers are a flower store if you like that stuff, I love it.
Or volunteering at an animal shelter or a farm, taking care of horses (if you like that stuff)
any of the above and more. Now is the the time you have all of the freedom and time in the world to do anything your heart desires.
