My hangout with foreign friends ended up being a lot better than last time.

I need to provide a good amount of context before I explain how it went. In my previous post, I mentioned that I was going to hang out with a friend group (my crush is also in this friend group). The last hangout with them made me feel really left out. For further context, I am someone that has moved to a different country and still trying to learn the language. This has made it really hard for me to communicate and understand people, including my friends. Back in June, I hung out with them, and it was probably one of the worst nights of my life. It was the whole reason I started 7 cups in the first place. I felt so left out and I was doing everything I can to understand what the heck they were saying. It was draining, but they aren't bad people and I don't blame them whatsoever for not engaging with me that night. They were with people that they were closer to and wanted to speak the language they were comfortable with. To be clear, I never want them to feel that they need to engage with me or having to translate for me. I want them to be as comfortable as possible around me, but that doesn't mean I didn't feel left out. I cried hard that night. Probably the hardest I have in a while.  I did talk with them about it eventually and they were very supportive thankfully. I did see them again before the very recent hangout I just had with them, but it was way too early for me and needed to get better mentally before I interacted with them again. Fast forward to yesterday, I met up with them for the first time after not talking to them for 2 months. I wanted to give them one more shot. I was more prepared because I have gotten mentally stronger and I knew this time, no matter what, I was going to choose myself instead of remaining in an uncomfortable situation. I had a better time than last time. I spoke their language most of the time, but they did do their best to check on me and see if I understood what they were saying. It felt good to say the least and I did have conversations with them finally, especially my crush who I didn't really have much of a chance to talk to the last couple of times. I ended up staying with them pretty late. Now, does that mean that there weren't moments where I didn't feel left out? Absolutely not. They're still closer to each other than I am with them and later into the night, they started checking less on me to see if I understood, but I get it. It was probably getting kind of tiring for them and I don't blame them. Doesn't mean they still didn't check by the way; it was just a lot less than earlier. However, it did get to a point where I was just it was so hard to keep up with what the heck everyone was saying. Combining that along with my social anxiety just made me PHSYICALLY and mentally exhausted, so I called a cab home. I know my limits and I needed to get out of there before I completely drained myself. When I was saying my goodbyes, my crush said she'll see me at graduation (we're both graduating next Saturday), so that was a neat. Overall, it was better than last time and that makes me happy and I am putting my faith that it is a start. Even if this was more positive, if any of you have any advice, that would be great. Thank you for listening 💙