Venting... also help me?
Hi. I don't know why simple things feel so hard for me. Like asking a question, sending a message, approaching someone, not knowing if i'm doing something right.
Everyone else seems to move through life so naturally while i'm stuck overthinking every little thing.
i know these things sound small but in my head, they become huge. I'll spend hours worrying about something that could probably be solved in a one-minute conversation and somehow i still can't make myself do it.
i hate that i need reassurance all the time. That i freeze when i don't know what to say. Or go quiet in "group discussions".
i hate that i feel like everyone else grew up and learned these things except me.
I started college recently, and I can say that I'm trying. Today, I talked to a classmate. I think i made a friend? Hopefully, we'll interact more. It's little progress. Of course, I want to change so tryinh. I want to abandon this part of me quickly. And it feels like it's not fast enough.
I wish people don't get the wrong idea that i'm not lazy or..unwilling. I'm just too much of a coward to put myself out there. Get out of my comfort zone. I'm scared of looking stupid, scared of doing the wrong thing, being judged or just messing up. Cuz I mess up all the time. Haha
i hope that one day the things i'm terrified of now become things i don't even think about anymore.
So here I am, typing ts after crying. I've been thinking about posting this because i genuinely don't know how to fix it anymore.
if you've ever been like this, what actually helped? Not "just do it. Be confident."
i mean how did you stop obsessing over every little thing like it's life or death?
I just want to understand how people get past this because i'm tired of feeling like i'm the only one struggling with things that seem so easy for everyone else. I want to like myself, too.
@theRoeDeer
More people than you see do the same thing. we overthink only think of what could go wrong etc and then chicken out. those who you think breeze through it are often faking it. I put off too much in life on a what if that never happened.
The reality is things do not get done themselves. you are far stronger than you realize. I am not saying "just do it" but I am encouraging you to think of this ... how many opportunities in life will you miss but not putting yourself out there?
How much time do you want to waste by talking yourself out of trying? time is more precious than many give it credit for. We never know how much we have... no way to log in and check a balance of how much time we have left in our lives.
I waited often until it was, I HAD to do something for a deadline or emergency ..... it turns out all that does is create more anxiety. Nothing has been as bad or difficult as i stressed it would be.
NO one is keeping score but us. Have I made a fool of myself? ... sure... but no one else remembers or cares. they are all too busy minding their issues. Those who are keeping score on others only are wasting their precious time because they are no scared to Live. They are on the sidelines in life and not participating in the game of life.
I understand what you're saying. Thank you :) ...tbh, sometimes, when i try to 'go out there', things would happen that makes me throw myself back to my shell. Too many times. A similar thing happened today and i just didn't know how to respond or what to do. Maybe i get overwhelmed too easily...so I let myself cry this time.
I don't want to miss opportunities anymore. The only one feeling sorry in the end would be me 😅. I know that. I never voiced this problems with my mouth. Not to anyone or even to the air. I just wanted a lil push. Or just one person that would see that I am struggling.
Thank you for your encouragement, @toughTiger6481 .Really. At least today wasn't so bad after all.
