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Conquering Worry: Insights & Practical Tips from Experts

User Profile: Hope
Hope February 28th, 2025

Hi everyone, I hope you are well. Worry has a way of creeping into our daily lives, often making even small challenges feel overwhelming. But what if there were simple, practical changes you could make to regain control and ease your mind?

This week, we are reflecting on the insights shared by therapists Lisa and Johanna and SoulfullyAButterfly, Content Head with a master's in clinical psychology. Each of them offered their thoughts on managing worry.  A huge thank you to Lisa, Johanna and Soulfully for sharing their knowledge and thoughtful perspectives with us.

Here’s what they had to say:

What’s one small change that made a big difference in how you handle worry?

Lisa: I remind myself of keeping things in perspective which helps me to reframe worrying. I remind myself of the worst case scenarios and separate the worries from reality vs hypothetical worries. I then take action and this helps me to manage my anxiety as often when we do not take action it seems to make the worries become bigger. 

SoulfullyAButterfly: I’ll call my change: Beyond worry, towards wonder. Worry may be an experience for me but how I analyze it and use it to wonder about my abilities or future possibilities counters any anxiety or distress. 

Johanna: I would recommend that an individual who worries can think about whether one of their basic emotional needs is/are not being met in the present (as this could be contributing to their worry spiraling). Below is a list of words that could reflect important emotional needs, and if one finds that a key emotional need is not being fulfilled, it is important for them to direct their attention towards trying to meet that need in the here and now. For example, if a core need is feeling “in control”, and someone is in a very chaotic environment, it could be helpful to implement a structure or routine to help someone feel safe or direct their attention to things that they can control/change. Therefore, any simple change in the present can help soothe one’s worry, if a person prioritizes meeting an unfilled emotional need in a new way! 
  • accepted
  • acknowledged 
  • admired 
  • believed in
  • cared about
  • heard
  • in control
  • included 
  • listened to 
  • loved 
  • needed 
  • noticed 
  • powerful 
  • productive/useful
  • reassured 
  • recognized 
  • respected 
  • safe/secure 
  • supported



Do you have a go-to strategy for calming your mind when worry starts creeping in? What is it?

Lisa: I actually ask myself is it really something that I need to worry about? What are the consequences of my specific concern/worry. I also use lots of mindfulness in the form of yoga which helps me to change my mindset too. 
 
SoulfullyAButterfly: My go to strategy for calming my mind when worry starts creeping in is to challenge the thoughts. As an overthinker and a person prone to overworrying/facing some doubt, anxiety or setbacks, I’ve learned that worries are just thoughts and sometimes are like automatic thoughts in response to change, uncertainty or other challenges. Challenging the thoughts simply involves evaluating the worry - where it comes from, what causes the distress, and what are the potential solutions. Oftentimes, we worry because we feel we are unprepared and that is sometimes logical, but so is the fact that we are usually very resilient. I’ve learned all mature people do worry a lot but it is how we use or proceed with the worry that matters.  

Johanna: I have always used mindfulness as a way from disengaging from worry thoughts and focusing on the present either through redirecting my attention on my breathing, my senses (things I can see/here/touch etc.), or through focusing on the properties of an external object. I have been caught one too many times examining paperclips during meetings (and now that my colleagues have figured out what I am doing, I catch them doing the same during tense moments!) 

Is there a book, quote, resource, or lesson that reshaped your approach to worrying?
 
Lisa: "If the problem can be solved, why worry? If the problem cannot be solved, worrying will do you no good." — Dalai Lama 

SoulfullyAButterfly: There are many quotes on the internet that describe worry as something that wastes time etc. and while it does rob us of some present peace, it is sometimes natural of us so I prefer this quote: “Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create." - Roy T. Bennett. This quote emphasizes we can change worry - like any emotion or feeling, we can process it and not let it consume us for longer periods that cause distress.

Johanna: The Happiness Trap-illustrated version by Russ Harris is a very helpful resource for worriers like myself. I use strategies from the book  in order to detach from my worry thoughts and refocus on what matters to me in the present with value-guided actions. The exercises are truly fun and engaging! 


If you could give one piece of advice to a fellow worrier, what would it be?

Lisa: As a seasoned worrier myself I focus on what I can control. Worry often comes from uncertainty and overthinking, but shifting your energy to actions within your control helps break the cycle. When you catch yourself spiraling, ask: What small step can I take right now? Even a tiny action can quiet the mind and bring relief.

SoulfullyAButterfly: Another tip is to talk to someone about your worry - do it in a way where you can say Hey, I’m worried about X because of Y. I feel A, B, C. What do you think? Just reasoning with someone who is able to listen or offer support, wisdom, or presence helps and 7 Cups has great listeners and peers where you can practice this too. - SoulfullyAButterfly

Johanna: Worries can prevent us from being engaged in present day life. The more we try to intentionally engage in what matters to us, while letting the worries play as background tunes, they will lose their power over us. That is, while your worries might still be circling your mind, they may bring up so much dread which will prevent you from working towards your goal because you will have exposed yourself and learnt how to tolerate this difficult feeling. Worry/anxiety and avoidance are best buddies, so an effective way to break the cycle of anxiety-avoidance is to gradually expose yourself to your anxiety and do what is important to you anyway.


Any other tips/recommendations/thoughts you wish to share with fellow worry warriors?

Lisa: Something I use often is the Circle of Control which is a therapeutic technique to help you to focus on the things that are within and outside of your control. You can learn more here. Please feel free to ask me any questions!

SoulfullyAButterfly: If you aren’t ready to talk about or challenge your worry directly, simply create a worry box/jar and every time you feel overwhelmed, write out your worry on a piece of paper and drop it into the worry jar while thinking about “letting go” of the thought(s). 

Johanna: Develop a different kind of relationship with your worries. Instead of fighting with them or pushing them away, treat them as messengers trying to tell you something….for example, they may be saying that you need more security, validation or to be heard. Then, thank your mind for telling you this important message, and detach from the worry thought by redirecting yourself to whatever you are doing in the present- whether it is washing dishes, driving to pick up your kids or getting ready for a date.

🌷Tasks of the week
  1. Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you. 
  2. Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.
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User Profile: EmbraceYourWings9340
EmbraceYourWings9340 March 28th, 2025

Tasks of the week

Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you. 

Lisa's resignated with me the most. I ask myself the same questions when I am worried about something. If I can't change it then I need to recognize that. 

Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.

I will ask myself if it's worth worrying about and if I can change the outcome. If I can't then I will need to give myself a pep talk and move on. 
User Profile: Kindness19
Kindness19 March 29th, 2025

@Hope 

Tasks of the week

1. Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you. 

Lisa's insight emphasizes the importance of focusing on the present and taking small, actionable steps toward achieving goals to manage anxiety effectively. This approach resonates deeply with me who often worry about the future, as it provides relief by shifting attention to manageable tasks and reducing overwhelming stress. Practicing this method fosters calmness and empowers me to regain control over my thoughts and emotions.

2. Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.

Two effective techniques that I would like to apply are the Worry Jar and Mindful Detachment. The Worry Jar, inspired by SoulfullyAButterfly, involves writing down worries on paper and placing them in a jar, symbolizing their release and helping to visually manage and detach from them. Johanna's Mindful Detachment method focuses on acknowledging worry thoughts, thanking the mind for its warnings, and shifting attention to the present by taking actionable steps. Both approaches offer creative ways to regain control during moments of unmanageable stress, fostering positivity and empowerment in my daily life.


User Profile: Ivy229
Ivy229 March 31st, 2025
🌷Tasks of the week

Part 1

Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you. 

I found it interesting, thought-provoking and practical how in Johanna's perspective about how an individual who worries can think about whether one of their basic emotional needs is/are not being met in the present (as this could be contributing to their worry spiraling). And how she emphasized the importance of addressing those needs directly and utilizing the list of emotional needs she provided can serve as a great tool for self-reflection and assist in recognizing which of these needs feels unfulfilled could help someone take specific, manageable actions to ease their worry. 

Johanna's perspective reminded me how addressing unmet emotional needs mirrors how other dimensions of wellness, when neglected, can impact our overall well-being both in terms of worry as well as to our overall health, wellness and wellbeing. And can contribute to how we think, feel, experience things and act. I like to think of dimensions of wellness as a wheel where if one is/are not being met in the present can ripple into others, just as taking positive action in one domain can foster a holistic sense of health and balance.
Part 2 

Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.

With Johanna's perspective I would think about establishing routines to feel “in control” or reaching out to trusted loved ones, support groups, professionals to feel “heard” would be helpful in my life. Establishing routines would support all the different dimensions depending on what it specifically includes. Reaching out to trusted loved ones, support groups, professionals would support social dimension as well as some of the others like emotional, spiritual, and intellectual. 

Johanna also mentioned developing a different kind of relationship with your worries. Instead of fighting with them or pushing them away, treat them as messengers trying to tell you something…. for example, they may be saying that you need more security, validation or to be heard. Is a practical and refreshing perspective on handling worry. Seeing worries as messengers rather than obstacles can help us understand ourselves better and address unmet needs. Redirecting attention to the present—whether it's embracing everyday tasks or savoring meaningful moments—grounds us and provides clarity. 

User Profile: CordialDancer
CordialDancer April 2nd, 2025

@Hope

1. Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you.

The insight that stood out to me the most was from Joanna, “I would recommend that an individual who worries can think about whether one of their basic emotional needs is/are not being met in the present.” 

I find I’m not always paying attention to my basic emotional needs, and that quote and the list she provided in that paragraph were eye-opening to me!

2. Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.

As mentioned in the first prompt this week, I plan to implement Joanna’s encouragement to reflect on meeting an emotional need to help the worrying. This, for me, could be taking a moment to reflect on the worry and then going down the list of needs as Joanna gave to us. The second tip, which I have mostly implemented, is developing a different relationship with my worries. I found in the past that thanking my body, mind, etc, in letting me know that something is feeling off helps me calm my worries better as they aren’t being ignored.

User Profile: AnnaliseJoy
AnnaliseJoy April 10th, 2025

@Hope

  1. Read through the thoughts shared by all three experts in this post. Reflect on which insight stood out to you the most and why it resonated with you. 

The insight that stood out to me the most was focusing on what you can control. I think this is important because not only does it help take your mind away from sitting in those worries, but it allows us to feel productive/gives us power/confidence because we are achieving something, even if its small. 

  1. Choose two tips shared in the post that you feel you could apply to your life. Describe how you plan to integrate each of these tips into your daily routine or mindset. Be specific about how you'll implement them and what changes you expect to see in your life as a result.

I'm a very poetic person, so I think SoulfullyAButterfly's suggestion on a worry jar is such a great idea. Jotting out worries is great in itself, but the process of tucking them away in a jar and feeling yourself let go and closing the lid is a healing concept. I also like the idea of Johanna's by starting a relationship with your worries. Negative feelings/thoughts is our bodies way of telling us something. I think it's a good idea to explore these worries and why they developed and whether they are based in reality or not.


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