My health is killing me

So for the last year and a half or so my health hasn't been all that great. Actually I'd say more like 2 years. Until recently I have had just one major issue.....we have classified it as IBS as we can't find anything else wrong. So much has happened over the last 2 years. I moved to a new state. Started working again. Got a divorce. Ok so not a lot. But still. With the IBS issues.....or sorta IBS issues I should be a stick figure but I'm not....in fact I am gaining weight agian. Ok Ok I know its partially my own fault. I drink Mountain Dew....and not just a little. Although I have cut back quite a bit. Anyways. Although the constant trips to the bathroom are annoying, they are tollerable for the most part. I mean I deal. It's just a part of my life now is how I see it. Well as of about 3 weeks ago a new symptom has started. I am having breathing issues. In the last 3 weeks I have been to the hospital twice because I was having trouble catching my breath. I am on medication for it. Allergy meds (as we thought at first that was the cause) and even steroids. But alas this weekend I had to use the nebulizer 4 times regardless. In talking to my family we are starting to think that maybe something else other than allergies is the cause.

I know that I suffer from Anxiety and Depression. I have been on medications since 2007. Different ones and different doses but still. I am starting to think that the anxiety part is not under control. Granted these last 2 years have been a bit interesting to say the least so that is part of the reasoning. But I am so tired of being tired and so much more. i hate using the nebulizer. I hate the frequent trips to the bathroom. I hate that I can't seem to loose weight.....even when I did cut out the soda I didn't loose weight. I just want to be normal again.

I joined 7 cups to seek help. Ended up becoming a listener as well to help others. I have learned so much. I love this place. I deperatly need to learn what my anxiety triggers are so that I can fight them as they are happening not say after the fact oh yeah I was freaking out then wasn't I. I am trying to get to see someone from the VA, but either it has to be on a day I just can't go or it's over an hour away. I can't afford it other wise. Navy medical, or rather the Veterans medical isn't always very friendly or easy to deal with.

Sorry this turned out to be more of a rant than a story. Anyways what I wanted to say is that althoght I am going thorugh health issues that are killing me....sometimes literlaly the way I've been breathing. I am still here. I still try to look at the possitive. It's not easy but I try. There is a lot of good in my life, I just have to remember to look for it.