The most challenging part about being Bipolar
Hello my Polar bears!!
We all face so many issues when we go through our highs and lows. And we are all here. We have made it through several emotional turmoils and relationship issues, job issues, money issues.
All are so different from each other and so tough to deal with. Congratulate yourself for just surviving all this. Pat yourself on your Back!!
I would want to understand from all of you what is the most challenging issue you had to deal with because of your bipolar disorder.
For me it is when I had to face my wife after a manic episode of hedonistic activities! I feel such shame and anger on myself. I feel guilty and my self esteem gets totally crushed. It takes a long time to recover from it.
I would love to hear from all of you what is the most difficult and challenging part you Had to deal with because of your mental illness!
@courageousPup5706
I really appreciate your honesty and you opening up! I your own strength, you will be able to help others and give them the courage to also open up!
💜🥰
So few years back I used to be lovesick about this girl but she was not interested so I didn't open up to her and we were friends .Then due to psychosis and bipolar I disturbed her and done many stupid things to her(like calling her multiple times , messaging her).Now it has been 3 years and I still feel like I lost a cool friend, and may be things would have been different if I opened up to her like normally.
Hi @braveHeart9005,
I think we have all been there. We mess up a lot of things and loose a lot also. But the worst of all is loosing good friends. I had lost my entire friends circle but then after a decade or so I opened up to them about my condition and they were good enough to enter my life back as my friends.
I guess you should try and reach out to her and share the reason why you troubled her. It’s part of making amends and most likely good friends usually come around.
I wish you all the best and I hope to hear back from you about how things are going after you start reaching out to old folks as part of the making amends exercise
So few years back I used to be lovesick about this girl but she was not interested so I didn't open up to her and we were friends .Then due to psychosis and bipolar I disturbed her and done many stupid things to her(like calling her multiple times , messaging her).Now it has been 3 years and I still feel like I lost a cool friend, and may be things would have been different if I opened up to her like normally.
The most challenging thing is that I can't connect with anyone. and also i really just dislike people like you to the point of actual malice.
@courageousPup5706 I hear you and was able to relate with the common patterns in this. For me, the most challenging part is how quickly I get irritated, annoyed and angry at someone or something. Then, I say something harsh or tantrum-y and later regret. It's like I can't get some headspace in that zone of getting triggered and reacting. Also, yeah... like you said, "hedonistic activities", the self-regulation takes a vacation and there's some sort of mindless indulgence in things, chucking the routine in the bin and even health. It's like I know I'm going wrong, but the bad feelings make me be in that loop. Is this the same with you? How do you get out of the zone eventually? What activities or things you do for... like self-care or therapy
?
@GrimSox
I feel you and it’s one of the toughest things to do - get out of the self destructive loop when you are *** yourself in voluntarily. The worst part of this illness is the people you hurt unintentionally, they will never be able to understand that it wasn’t you but your illness that said/did those horrible things. In the end you need to take accountability of everything as it was “you” even though it wasn’t YOU.
Only way to get out of this is not get into it. While you are in the episode it’s very difficult to regulate yourself. Your mind will find all the hacks possible to take you down that road of trouble. There is very little you can do.
One thing is having a partner or friend whom you would blindly listen and they take you to a therapist or psychiatrist when they see you in an episode.
Other thing is to avoid getting into one:
Ensure you take your medication regularly
Ensure that you do your self care, journaling, etc
Recognise triggers, cycle won’t initiate overnight sometimes, you will have some signs you can look out for.
Prepare something called a “Cope Ahead” plan. Where you have prepared a list of of behaviours and what actions you need to take. For instance : I have - Withdrawing my investments as a behaviour check to ensure that I stop and not spend the money.
Hope my strategy helps you. Let me know what you think.