Conflicted
I’m with someone who doesn’t see any wrong in what they do…. It’s disappointing. I’m always getting told what I do wrong but the second I try and I mean try!!!! To say something that I’m not sure about or okay with I get threatened to be kicked out….. imagine that anytime I have a different opinion or try to share my feelings I get shut down and threatened to have my belongings on the sidewalk.
Am I really that disposable? We have a kid together… I take care of our home, I cook every meal I clean every dish and fold every piece of clothing in the house. I don’t even feel right saying that it’s “our house” because I get reminded that this isn’t my home.
I’m sad. I truly am sad. I want to have a sense of belonging here.
@willingChestnut2540 I understand that it is very hard to not feel welcome in the place that you live. Are there any certain times when you feel this way or is it always? Have you tried having a conversation with your partner?
@willingChestnut2540
It sounds like you’re in a really painful situation right now. I can feel how much you care and how much effort you’re putting into this relationship emotionally, mentally, maybe even physically. That kind of one-sided weight can be so heavy.
Relationships involve two people, and when it starts to feel like it’s only you showing up, it can hurt in a way that’s hard to explain. Everyone has different needs, and sometimes those needs go unspoken or unmet. But when one person constantly feels dismissed or unseen, it can leave them feeling empty and questioning everything.
You’re not wrong for wanting connection or care. Your feelings are real and valid. I'm really glad you’re talking about it here; that takes strength.
@willingChestnut2540
I just want to say… I really hear you. I’ve been in a space like that before, where I was trying so hard to make things work, and it still felt like nothing I did was enough. It’s such a lonely, exhausting place to be when you're giving your all, and it feels like the other person isn't truly there for you. From what you’ve shared, it sounds like you're showing up in so many ways emotionally, mentally, maybe even spiritually, and still feeling unseen or unappreciated. That kind of hurt cuts deep. Relationships are built on mutual effort, and when one person is left carrying all the emotional weight, it can feel like you're drowning. It’s okay to feel tired. It’s okay to feel confused or angry, or heartbroken. Those feelings are real, and they matter. I'm really glad you’re speaking up about this; that in itself is a sign of strength. You’re not alone.
Willing Chestnut2540:
I feel for you. You are in an abusive relationship. He will try to make you feel that everything you do is wrong and all his abuse is your fault. That is his way of controlling you. I would tell him that you will not accept being treated disrespectfully and if he doesn’t show more respect that you will end your relationship. If he then treats you better, and apologizes then maybe you can salvage your marriage. If he just gets upset you should leave him. I know that is hard to hear but you only have one life and you deserve to live with a man that loves and cherishes you. ❤️❤️❤️
I went through this but with my mother always threatening with basic needs but since it’s a silence type of abuse you don’t see it until it’s too late…my therapist one day told me “if someone who you have any type of relationship threatens against your basic human needs or rights, it’s abuse, because taking away someone’s basic needs as a roof over their head, or starving them, or sleep depriving them, it’s the abuser trying to make you feel less than a human being even lees than any other being, because even animals have basic rights and their basic needs fulfilled” and then she said something that stuck with me forever “ depriving someone from their basic human rights and needs is a tactic used as torture on civilians and soldiers in a war…because it’s one of the worse and quickest way to break someone’s psyche”