Check-in, Depression Support, 5 to 11 of September, 2022
Goals...
A very warm hello to you all!
I hope and wish you all are doing very well.
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How have you been feeling these days?
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What main goals do you have for now and as far as you can see in the future?
- What needs to be done, or habits be cultivated to achieve those goals?
All questions are optional. You can add any comments you wish, as they come to your mind.
I look forward to your answers!
If you find joining the Depression Support team interesting, learn more about opportunities, requirements, and how to join by clicking HERE.
I wish you all the best!
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Hi Healing! Haven't seen you around. I come and go on this site...I've gotten a new job and stayed in it, almost a year now. Felt so preoccupied and okay, so I didn't need to come, but now, I feel detached from the world again and just don't like this feeling. I'm not feeling useful at my job, just used. Job is just restocking and taking care of customers at a store. I want to try branching out, but I don't have connections to other fields and I'm afraid no perfect job for me exists.
A goal for this week is to go do something fun by myself one day, and one other day with someone else, possibly VF, my coworker. Its a challenge to get myself to text them to meet up, because I've faced rejection so many times...I'll be so mad to see another rejection from a "friend". What needs to be done is be nice and approach with an open mind. I'm so tired of being the nice one...I'm falling apart...
@Skyy0
Hello Sky!
Nice to see you again!
Thank you for checking in!
I am glad that you have gotten a new job and stayed in it for a year so far.
Jobs are basically for making money. Even people that start very enthusiastic with their occupation, with time get bored (even in very prestigious ones) and do it mostly for the money.
This describes 99.99% of the people. Of course, there are those fortunate that have a "dream job" which doesn't feel like work. But they are a tiny minority.
Anyway, you might select some other occupation you wish to do in the future, start preparing for it, like taking courses, etc, and eventually do it in parallel, particularly if it's a freelance job.
And you might also develop hobbies and activities that you enjoy doing out of work, so as to have a balanced life.
It seems that your relations with "VF" are quite complex, having been rejected many times.
Have you been accepted many times as well? Or all you get are rejections?
I am very sorry you feel like falling apart. You might PM me or another Listener to get support when you feel so bad.
I wish things turn out well and you have some enjoyable times this week.
See you soon.
All the best!
Marcelo.
It is so nice to see you again. I am sorry that it is a struggle right now. I do believe that there is a good job for you out there, but sometimes you have to experiment to find it. What makes this job not the right fit?@Skyy0
@HealingTalk
Hi, Talk,
- How have you been feeling these days? frantic--i feel out of breath
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What main goals do you have for now and as far as you can see in the future? Just to cultivate a good sleep schedule and not to drink
- What needs to be done, or habits be cultivated to achieve those goals? I have to remain calm, do whatever chores I have, and take my evening prescriptions on time. As far as not drinking, I have to keep my mind occupied and focused on healthy thoughts.
@purpleTree4652
Hello!
Thank you for coming here!
I can imagine how overwhelming might have been these days.
I hope things get better soon.
A good sleep schedule is a great place to start.
It gives a healthy structure to your life, and of course, makes you feel much better the next day.
Avoid alcohol at all costs.
Do breathing exercises, drink Valerian tea, work out, go for walks, and eventually, if anxiety gets out of control consult with a specialized doctor to adjust your medication.
Don't stock alcoholic beverages in your house. Get rid of those if you have them now.
Some useful breathing exercises from VeryWellMind:
https://www.verywellmind.com/abdominal-breathing-2584115
You have clear ideas on what to do to feel better.
Think about your life two years from now, and the current situation as temporary.
I wish you all the best!
Stay in touch,
Marcelo
@HealingTalk
I'm trying Marcelo.
I'll stay in touch.
Thanks.
@purpleTree4652
I know you are trying your best.
You are a life warrior.
I admire you for that.
You will prevail.
Sending peace. You are going to find a path forward. @purpleTree4652
@purpleTree4652
Hi tree 💜
I’m sorry to hear that things have been rough lately. Cultivating a good sleep schedule sounds easy, but it’s definitely harder than expected. (I speak from my own personal experience.) It just goes to show how much fortitude you have in wanting to improve your life by doing that, along with not drinking and keeping up with your meds. “Important life changes rarely ever happen in our comfort zone”, as Matt D’avella said. I’ll always be here cheering you on from the sidelines. 🙂
♥️,
Autumn 🍁🍂
@HealingTalk
- How have you been feeling these days? a little sad and tired
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What main goals do you have for now and as far as you can see in the future? getting my room clean
- What needs to be done, or habits be cultivated to achieve those goals? so much to be done, don't know where to start :/
@Mellietronx
Hello Mellie!
Nice to see you again!
Thank you for checking in!
I'm sorry you have been feeling sad. Has anything in particular happened recently?
Putting order in your room is a great, wise goal, I think.
The environment where we spend most of our time affects us a lot.
And the very act of getting rid of useless things, and ordering the useful and beautiful ones, makes us feel better.
It's like there is a connection with our mind
Uncluttering our habitat makes our minds feel less chaotic and more at peace.
With the right attitude, cleaning might become almost a spiritual experience.
I leave you a link with some tips to inspire you:
https://parade.com/972469/marynliles/decluttering-tips/
And a video using Marie Kondo's tough but effective rules, that might help you decide where to start:
I hope some of these might help.
I wish you much luck in your project!
It might be tough, but very healthy and a great way to promote your wellbeing.
All the best!
Marcelo.
It is nice to see you posting again. I hope that today was less exhausting. @Mellietronx
@HealingTalk
It's been rough lately. I am waiting to see my new doctor and ask to be tested for bipolar. I am having more and more signs of it. If I don't have it, then my depression is simply just getting worse or my medication isn't working as well anymore.
Main goal is to find ways to deal with my struggles until I know for sure what's going on.
Sending peace as you find a path forward. @passionateBeing6922
@passionateBeing6922
Hello!
Thank you for checking in!
I hope that you see your new doctor soon, so they can update the diagnosis and adjust the medication accordingly.
I wish you that you can cope well with this uncertain situation until it gets clear.
All the best!
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk
Hi Healing! I am new here and am thankful that I found this site. I have been feeling better today. My depression has lightened up. The last month had been really hard. I had tears in my eyes almost everyday and was in a deep dark space. I am thankful that I am out of that place for now.
My goal for the next 8 weeks on is to attend once a week Equine Group Therapy and to open up and talk. I have a hard time talking in a group of people. This is going to be had for me because I start getting really anxious and I can't get the words out of my mouth. I am going to push myself to get at least a few words out each week.
@Judy7
Hello Judy!
Welcome to 7 Cups' Depression Support SubCommunity!
And thank you for checking in!
I am glad that you have been feeling better recently, after such a tough month.
As I understand it, Equine Therapy is particularly helpful for social anxiety and other issues around dealing with human beings.
Horses are very sensitive to our emotional state, and non-judgemental, so you might connect with them easier than with people.
Horses give you the opportunity to express your emotions without fear of judgement, thus providing a great base from which to improve your trust in others.
Equine therapy will help you feel more confident in human group settings, so your words expressing emotions will come naturally out of your mouth without having to pus yourself.
I wish you all the luck with this wonderful healing experience. That you get all the benefits it can provide.
And get better at joining and connecting with human groups, as a result.
All the best,
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk Thank you for your words of encouragement. Group today was really good. I was able to share a little with the group. The horses were wonderful and I felt so at ease while I was with them. It is amazing how just being with them I became so calm. I think I learned a little about myself today. I have attended Equine Group Therapy before and yes the horses help me to see things about myself that I either need to change or need to build on.
@HealingTalk
Hi Healing ♥️
I’ve been up and down these days. Unfortunately I recently had a down. My mom messaged one of my friends to tell them to tell me that one of my uncles passed away, and now I don’t know how to feel. There’s a lot of complications from my past that add to the confusion. I wasn’t extremely close to my uncle, but we didn’t have a bad relationship or anything like that. I think the main thing is that this is the first family death that has occurred since I left my biological family. (Long story short, we had a falling out and I left for my own safety and peace of mind.) But I think I’m just rambling at this point. Anyways, thank you for the check-in and for reading my emotional unloading. Hope you’re doing okay.
Best,
Autumn ♥️🍁🍂
@TheAutumnWitch
Hello Autumn!
Nice to see you again!
Thank you for checking in!
I imagine how emotionally confusing this situation is for you
You don't "need to feel" in any particular way.
You might show some concern if you feel like it.
Don't feel guilty for "not feeling sad enough".
I wish you feel better soon.
All the best!
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk
Hi Marcelo, good to see you again too ♥️
Well, another complication is that my mom abused me (gaslighting, hitting me, things like that), so now I’m not in contact with her for my own sake of mind. I am concerned about her and everyone else involved, but there is a possibility that if I reached out, it would leave me open to being abused again. I was thinking of maybe anonymously sending flowers or visiting my uncle’s grave at a different time so as to avoid causing/exacerbating drama. I just hope that that would be enough. One of the things hanging over my head is that I didn’t get to say goodbye not just because I fled the family, but also because his death was unexpected. (I’m not yet sure what his cause of death was so far.) Thank you for sending me that link; I’ll be sure to take a look into it. Also thanks again for reading my emotional unloading. I appreciate you. ♥️
@TheAutumnWitch
Sorry, Autumn!
I didn't understand your situation.
I made the wrong assumptions.
I made a mistake.
I corrected my post.
But I apologize for my wrong words at this delicate time for you.
I wish you can deal with this situation the best possible way: your own way.
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk
That’s all right, Marcelo. I’m still figuring out who to tell about my situation and how much information I want to share; sometimes I feel like I’m saying too much haha. It’s weird and delicate, I guess. If my mom wasn’t abusive then things would definitely be different. Even so, despite the abuse, I do worry about my biological family. And again, thank you for checking in on me. It’s nice to know that others are concerned. ♥️
@TheAutumnWitch
Thank you for your kind, forgiving words.
You are right that it's delicate, might be painful, and sometimes even counterproductive to tell more than is comfortable to you.
While confusing, it's good that the issue with your mother has not ruined your feelings for all members of your biological family.
Thank you again for your kind words.
I appreciate them a lot.
Marcelo.
@TheAutumnWitch
Hi, Autumn,
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Have you thought about celebrating his life in your own way? Maybe you can just pray for him, or send flowers to the funeral home (if he is in one). You don't have to say anything to your blood family.
Take care.
xo, tree
@purpleTree4652
Thank you, tree 💜
So far I’ve prayed for him, and I am considering sending flowers to the funeral home. It means a lot to me that you said (well, typed, haha) I don’t need to say anything to my blood family. It’s strange how easy it is for me to forget myself- and others- in the process of worrying about “What would so-and-so think?” But ultimately it’s between me and my departed uncle. I have to remember that, and you’ve helped with that. Thank you.
@TheAutumnWitch
That's right, Autumn. It's between you and your Uncle. God bless you both, whomever or whatever your God may be.
Hope to see you again.
Take care my friend.
xo, tree
@purpleTree4652
Again, thank you, tree.
Hope to see you again too. 💜
You take care as well.
♥️🍁🍂
Sending lots of peace. You did the right and brave thing in cutting off contact. But that doesn't stop it from hurting sometimes.@TheAutumnWitch
@bestVase7265
Thank you, Vase. You took the words out of my mouth. I didn’t really know my uncle that well, but he was never mean to me. And that makes so much more of an impact. ♥️
Yes, that makes it harder when others in your family were more problematic. It sounds like it was quite the shock.
Sometimes it helps to just do something that you think he might have enjoyed in his memory. Did he have any hobbies?@TheAutumnWitch
@bestVase7265
It was indeed quite the shock. I wasn’t expecting him to be the first one to pass away, but looking back on it, I think he might have had health problems that he didn’t openly discuss. He was very skeletal and gaunt when I last saw him.
He was a chef, and a very good one, too. If I remember correctly I think he owned his own restaurant. Even prior to his passing I was getting into cooking and baking of my own accord, but now it feels a little different thinking about him whenever I prepare food.
That sounds great! It will be a good time to remember him in your own way without any outside family pressures. @TheAutumnWitch
@HealingTalk Hi there
I have been feeling depressed and empty lately. I feel tired of doing things and don't feel motivated to do any work. My life feels meaningless.
My goal is to finish a project at work. But I have a check-in tomorrow on the project and I know I will receive some negative feedback from a coworker I don't get along with. I'm unsure if I am in the headspace to take it constructively. I feel like I am not good at my job and everyone knows it.
Sorry that it is a struggle at the moment. Can you tell us more about what you do? I bet that you are better at it than you think. @arittn
@HealingTalk
Not too great. My anxiety has been acting up and I haven't been able to get anything done. Going to start a new job soon, which is both scary and exciting, but I am counting down my days of free time.
The world is scary, and I am still having the same thoughts about myself that I had ten years ago. I worry that I'm just going to be stuck in this cycle forever.
I want to be able to do things without fighting my brain about it. And possibly try to value my achievements better.
I have been very worried about my place in the world lately. Whether my work is good enough. I know that if it isn't that i simply have more work to do, but it's exhausting and I can't imagine not struggling with this. I hate that i need praise in order to feel good about myself.
@affableStrings4654
Hello, Strings!
Thank you for checking in!
Congratulations on your new job!
I wish you a great start, that you feel comfortable there and it becomes a source of satisfaction.
You might try to give high priority to changing your self-talk, and try some systematic program of identifying negative thoughts, challenging them, and replacing them with some more positive ones.
You are a valuable person no matter what happens with your work.
One thing is your intrinsic value and another is the circumstances we might face in the world.
Think of yourself as a valuable being always, no matter what.
Anyway, let's hope your new work is great and gives you lots of fulfillment!
I wish you all the best!
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk
Thank you <3
@affableStrings4654
You are welcome, Strings!
@HealingTalk
Hi, recently I have been feeling really depressed due to my physical health and mental health. I also worry that I'm a burden on my partner and people around me but I am trying to stay positive about it.
My goals right now are to go to my classes and finish this semester with good grades. I also want to create a good story in my creative writing course and learn more about writing.
For now, I need to just attend classes, and work on my coursework on time. I also need to take care of myself so my physical health doesn't get any worse.
It sounds like you are doing the best that you can. One of the biggest symptoms of depression is to worry that you are making others depressed or upset. You usually aren't. Your brain is lying to you.
Keep working on that creative writing. What kind of story are you planning? @crystallizedrequiem
Thank you, I am currently working on a dark fantasy romance/horror novel that features a character being naive but growing over the course of the novel and becoming a strong and independent person. She may not do things the best way, but she can take care of herself. It has a big theme of feminism and challenges stories who have female leads settle in unhealthy relationships since she doesn't settle for the one that she is forced into. It means a lot to me because of experiences I went through and ideologies placed on me as a woman before my transition to a guy.
That sounds utterly fantastic and so empowering. It is a great thing to focus on right now. @crystallizedrequiem
@HealingTalk
I love your name there is healing in it alone.❤️🙏
I was not sure how to answer the questions. I need to ponder over some answers🤷♀️
@scarletPear1945
Hi!
Thank you for your so kind words!
And for coming here to this check-in!
There is no hurry to answer any questions...
Your presence is more than enough.
You have all the time in the world to answer whatever you want.
I wish you al the best!
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk
Thank you so much❤️
@scarletPear1945
You are welcome!