One thing I am feeling sad about today is....{share here}

no one loves me.

I feel I volunteer and also work in a field where I help others and reach out to those hurting...maybe to make up for, idk, whatever it is that I did that makes people not care about me....

but I DONT GET THTA BACK IN RETURN...

I FEEL ALL ALONE IN THIS WORLD ( I AM NOT - I HAVE ONE AUNT) ...but...

truth is:

no one loves me.

Sorry for caps - im just too tired to re-type this

That the girl I like probably only sees me as someone friendly. Its somewhat rare for me to get crushes in the first place so the fear of rejection and not being enough drags me down hard. Im probably gonna ask her out next week just to see and hope for the best

Giving up on everyone

that my family has no holiday cheer and no holiday spirit. I try and try. We dont even have a tree - and would have no decorations if i had not put them up myself. . . as it were, i put them up so late because I was so depressed - but even depressed - i tried. I feel isolated and alone this christmas season. even in myown home and family.

Nightmares about a dead friend.

Childhood memories of trauma that are slowly re-emerging. Its like living through a nightmare sometimes. I keep trying but sometimes it is very challenging.

I am alone...

Im sad that Ive had grief, anger and depression to deal with the majority of my life and today, Im handed a fresh dose of all three-in case I thought I could finally feel peace.

Missing the people I love that are no longer alive.

I have a new person over me at work and he is moving my stuff around : (.