Boy problem
Why do I still miss him even though he did bad things to me? I see him around school after I broke up with him and he seems perfectly fine and happy while I’m the one struggling. I know I initiated the break up, but I never intended to make him hate me because of it and lose his friendship. All my friends want me to snap out of it because they say he’s a horrible person who did terrible things to me, but I just can’t help but want to talk to him or see him.
@lavenderWillow8524
It is okay. You can love him but not stay with him. There are times you have to choose yourself.
Give it time. Maybe you'll feel better.
@lavenderWillow8524 It sounds like your friends want you to just snap out of a breakup where you're the miserable one and the boy seems fine. Breakups are really hard so it is natural to feel depressed while going through it. What is something that would have made this breakup easier for you?
@lavenderWillow8524
I see that you're grappling with complex emotions following your breakup, and I appreciate your openness in sharing your feelings. Breakups can be incredibly challenging, especially when there are conflicting emotions involved.
It's completely normal to feel a sense of longing or miss someone, even if the relationship had its difficulties. Emotional connections can be strong, and adjusting to a new reality can take time.
It's important to remember that healing is a unique and individual process, and there's no set timeline for moving on. Your feelings are valid, and it's okay to acknowledge the complexity of the situation.
Seeing your ex-partner seemingly happy while you're struggling can be tough. Keep in mind that people cope with emotions differently, and appearances may not always reflect the internal experience. Your focus should be on your own well-being and healing.
Consider surrounding yourself with supportive friends who understand your emotions and can offer encouragement.
It's okay to prioritize your own healing and well-being, even if others have different perspectives. Take things one step at a time, and be gentle with yourself during this process.
Wishing you strength and healing, Big hugs, Angel
@lavenderWillow8524
Navigating our emotions can be an incredibly difficult process, especially when we’re in a turbulent environment like our school, where we’re put under several kinds of stressors—academic, friendships, gossip—that can all intensify the already messy feelings surrounding a breakup :(
As other people in the thread have mentioned, it’s good that you’re acknowledging your feelings and not ignoring them, since our emotions are valid. You might also try communicating with your friends so that they can better offer you what you need—asking them for more encouragement, asking for distractions, or whatever you think might help support you.
Ultimately, there is no single ‘right’ way to handle a breakup, so try to be kind to yourself while you’re going through this difficult time.
@lavenderWillow8524
Thank you for sharing your feelings, and reaching out :)
Your feelings are valid and I want you to know it's okay to feel this way.
It sounds like you're going through some conflicting emotions after your break up. Although he did some bad things to you, you still miss him - that's okay and it's something normal. Although there were difficult times, he was still someone you liked/loved, and perhaps part of you still has a connection with him, that's completely normal. Break ups can be tough, especially when there are different emotions involved; during a relationship, emotional connections are made, sometimes, it can be difficult to let go of them and adjust to not being with that person anymore.
Perhaps, consider prioritising healing and your well-being; others may tell you differently, and have different perspectives, but it's important to prioritise yourself and put yourself first; take things slowly and at your own pace.
Take care <3
