I feel invisible
TW//////
Life has been hard recently. I am trying to do everything right and I am failing. I disappoint everyone around me. I don't talk and just avoid everyone who I live with. I am in foster care, and have been for 9 months. I don't have friends at school. I work a lot and have nice coworkers, but outside of that I just get my school done and just get through each day.
I go though each day get my own things done, and barely ever talk to people if I am not at work. I have disappeared for hours and no one has noticed. I feel like no one cares about me.
Last week I had a meeting with the FBI. And the case is going to go no where. I am frustrated with it all. And want him in jail/prison. I creating a list of every place where I was raped. So maybe there was video footage of it happening. He deserves nothing, and should be in jail. I feel like I am in jail living in this house. I hate it so much.
It has been hard to find all the places and I have given myself so many panic attacks by doing so.
I am constantly stressed about what I am going to do once I am 18. I am alone and the friend who I was planning on living with. Bad things came up about her. So I am no longer going there. So now I have zero place to crash and it is scary. I want to be free, but I also need to figure out an income.
I am very adventures, but not a lot of those jobs actually pay and if they do they don't pay well. Which I have been going back and forth of does it actually matter. I don't want kids, and I don't think I ever want a boyfriend or to get married. I hate relying on anyone and just can't. I can't trust people and that destroys relationships.
*hugs to anyone who wants
I am surprised if anyone reads this far down to my rants.... I just needed to talk. And have no one to talk to.
@Pickoff I just wanted to say that i read it all. I'm really so sorry you're going through so much 😔
Thank you❤️❤️❤️
Eventually it all should end and life will be good
@Pickoff Yes 💖🫂
I'm very sorry to hear about what happened to you and I'm sorry that you feel untrusting to people. I feel the same way, my so-called friends have let me down many times and ignored me, but I still hope to find friends that I can confide in and that I can show on a good person too. I'm sure you're also a good person and I hope that you can let your spirit shine and find a safe space too live a happy life. Hugs! 🤗
Thank you!
Friends are just hard to make.
Yes they are, especially if you're 49 like me. Sometimes I try to go to Meetup gatherings, like trivia on Sundays. There are some good people there... I was thinking of volunteering with the elderly who feel lonely and I think that would be a good way for me to try to be a friend to someone in need.
Yeah, that sounds like a good way to find good people! I hope you find good people
🌈🤗 hugs back at you!
I have read everything. No worries about kids and family of your own, you are so young now...
For your living situation, there are jobs that offer accommodation, mostly in hospitality or warehousing. They can be a life saver.
I don't know if you would be interested in them, but this is an option I have using in the past.
Again sending hugs and support 💚🙏🐻
I know I am young. But once I am 18 I am going to have nothing. So I wantat least have some idea.
I need to find a job with housing accomodations. Or I will end up living in my car. I just need to look into more of them.
Thank you ❤️
