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Anorexia - how do you actually feel today?

User Profile: Laura
Laura December 10th, 2014

Let us know here! Post every day!!!

182
User Profile: Dianaymia1991
Dianaymia1991 April 10th, 2015

Holasoyanorexicaybulimicadesdelos 16asmegustarconocerpersonasquehallanpasadoporestoo loestenpasando.Muchosbesos!!!

1 reply
User Profile: lolaxic
lolaxic April 25th, 2015

hola soy brasiliana. passei por isso ano passado e estou me recuperando, eu odeio isso.

queria voltar ao meu corpo anterior!

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User Profile: Fleo
Fleo May 22nd, 2015

Cold, lost and hungry. But cant eat.

User Profile: EmiilyM
EmiilyM May 26th, 2015

awful..like a big fat disgusting piece of s***...but I feel determined (not in a good way though :(..)

3 replies
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia May 27th, 2015

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so much right now. Please reach out either here or to someone in your life to get support - this is too hard a thing to do alone, and you deserve to have others help you out. Take care

2 replies
User Profile: EmiilyM
EmiilyM May 30th, 2015

oh sweetie, thank you for your kind words...I actually am getting help but I just don't feel like I 100% need/want recovery yet...although I wish I could finally say I do...

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia May 30th, 2015

Truly wanting to recover is absolutely the hardest part, because you can spend a lot of time conflicted with part of you wanting to get better, part of you not, and all of you feeling the pain of that. But, I think that starting to get that help is big and as you start to heal, it will become easier to want it for real. And even if it doesn't, you'll learn valuable things that will help you whenever you need them. You can do this!

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User Profile: muteTheVoice7196
muteTheVoice7196 June 4th, 2015
DISGUSTED AT MYSELF FOR EATING DINNER, I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF THROW UP AGAIN.
1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia June 4th, 2015

It sounds like you're in a lot of pain right now, and I'm sorry that last night was so hard for you. If you ever want to talk through how you're feeling and process some of it, there are loads of fabulous listeners on here who would be happy to support you. Take care

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User Profile: WonderlandAlice7
WonderlandAlice7 June 6th, 2015

Fat. Huge. Disgusting. Suicidal. Guilty for eating when I could have gotten away with starving.

6 replies
User Profile: EmiilyM
EmiilyM June 6th, 2015

I could just copy that word from word...exactly how I feel...wish you didn't though :(

5 replies
User Profile: WonderlandAlice7
WonderlandAlice7 June 7th, 2015

thanks I wish you didn't eithersad this thing is just so sucky

4 replies
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia June 7th, 2015

@WonderlandAlice7 and @EmiilyM - I'm so sorry to hear you are in so much pain. This is a terrible disease and one that can be so hard to fight, but you don't have to do it alone. I hope you have support in your lives and that you are finding extra support here. Feel free to reach out if I can help you at all. Take care

3 replies
User Profile: EmiilyM
EmiilyM June 7th, 2015

Thank you fo your kind words. You are right. The problem, at least in my case, is actually wanting to recover. Of course I hate this disease and it absolutely destroys me but I can't imagine life without it after all those years

2 replies
User Profile: WonderlandAlice7
WonderlandAlice7 June 7th, 2015

Thank you @anomaliasmiley I really appreciate it, if you ever need anyone to talk to, I can listen. I'm quite lucky that I have my best friend to support me but I'm the same as EmiilyM, I don't want help but I feel like I have to get it because it's expected of me. I'm hoping this will change though, same as I hope it does for you @EmiilyM

1 reply
User Profile: EmiilyM
EmiilyM June 8th, 2015

Thank you sweetie ?

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User Profile: Cranberrysauce
Cranberrysauce June 18th, 2015

my chest hurts, my stomach hurts, my head hurts... why dontthe painkillers work?...

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia June 18th, 2015

@CranberrySauce - I'm sorry you're in so much pain right now. Do you know what is causing it? Is this something that will get better with time? Take care - I hope you feel better later today.

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User Profile: HermioneG
HermioneG June 18th, 2015

I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to eat anything today or ever again. I wish I could just throw away all these hideous chunks of fat off my body and never have to eat again.

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia June 18th, 2015

@HermioneG - I can hear how much pain you're in right now, and my heart aches for you. It sounds like you could really use someone to talk to about how you're feeling - that might help take some of the burden away from you. Do you have someone, a friend or family member, or a counselor you are talking to? There are loads of great listeners here, too. Take care

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User Profile: LettieHatter
LettieHatter July 1st, 2015

I had way to much to eat for dinner, I feel fat and ugly and its my bf's birthday, so yes that means I had cake. I hate that I cant say no to food like I use to. Its like I have no more self control. I dont purge, I can never make myself throw up, but I cut if Iveate to much. Ivestruggled with self harm probably longer then I have with food. Tonight I wanted to dress sexy for him since it's his birthday. But how can I possibly be sexy for him when I dont feel sexy. I have new healing scars on my thighs and arms, I feel fat all over. All I want to do is cry and Im trying my hardest to be happy for him today. How can I get over this self confidence issue just for tonight? How can I fake it enough just for tonight, for him? To pretend like Im not fat and dont have all these marks on me, it feel impossible. I f***ing hate myself.

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia July 1st, 2015

@LettieHatter - how did the rest of the night go? Were you able to get through it? My heart aches to hear the pain and self-hatred you're feeling, and I know how hard it is when you are trying and not able to do something. The only advice I can offer is to forgive yourself. It's not easy, but if you can let go and move forward, you'll be able to come through this.

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User Profile: HermioneG
HermioneG July 1st, 2015

I hate myself.

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia July 1st, 2015

@HermioneG - I'm sorry you're feeling so down on yourself. Is it something you want to talk about with someone?

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User Profile: Ryoukyo
Ryoukyo July 1st, 2015

I feel so disgusted of my self. i feel so fat. i dont' know if i should eat dinner..

1 reply
User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia July 1st, 2015

@Ryoukyo - It can be so hard to want to eat a meal when you're feeling the way you do right now, but your body needs nourishment. Do you think it would help to talk to a listener on here? They could even talk to you while you're eating, if you think some extra encouragement would help. Take care

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