Eating Disorder Community - How do you actually feel today?
wanted cereal in a big bowl for breakfast, but instead, it only let me eat a small snack.
Then because of wat I ate for breakfast wen I got to work, I reeeaalllyy wanted (even though it felt like a need) to over exercise...
But yay me. I stopped myself before that happened... Which made me feel like a lazy and pathetic loser!!!!!!!!
I don't really know what I'm feeling. For almost 2 weeks I just feel dead inside. I feel hollow. I haven't eaten really in a few days..well that's a lie, I have. I just haven't kept anything down
@Redheadbaker7206
I guess I just feel numb. Something I feel has changed in the last 2 weeks..and I can't quite explain it. It just feels like I'm giving up...but I want to try and get better. It's kinda hard to explain. (I had to reply bc it saved it as I exited the app 😟)
@Redheadbaker7206 hey! it sounds like you're reaching an important turning point like you have two options, to get help or to give up. I really hope you choose to get some support because even if you cant see it right now you really do deserve to be free of this. :D
Scared of eating but know I have to. I feel alone
@ms1999 - I know it's scary, but I'm really proud of you for recognizing it's what you need to do! If you ever need some extra support, you can always reach out to me. Take care and stay strong, lovely!
@ms1999
I felt also its scared of eating.
But more broaden its more of the fear of being more chunky as i may say.
If i could eat all the food in the world but not have to worry on getting huge that my friend would be me eating happily with no care.
like starving myself and cutting because im so patheticlly worthless!!!!!!
@alexaners7734 you might not see it now but you won't always feel this way. It will get better I promise. Keep fighting to get better💓
I had a minor melt down last night at my eating disorder support group... I ran out embarrassed. Four people from the group called to see if I was ok.. I feel so embarrassed that they felt the need to call me. But in a way it's nice to know they care. I felt connected to someone (to the one who called me).... I haven't felt connected with anyone lately. It brings a sadness in my stomach that I can't quite explain. I guess a longing.
@Redheadbaker7206
Hello, RH7206, thank you for sharing your experience. Allowing yourself to feel vulnerable is an awesome thing to do.. Connection is what we need to feel loved.. I am so happy you are all for a learning experience out of something unconfortable.. You go girl! :)
@Redheadbaker7206 sorry to hear this message me if you need a chat
Hi. Can someone tell me IF and how it is REALLY possible to heal from anorexia? because I just don't believe it is. After years of treatment I reach an healthy weight. One year ago I was feeling quite fine, I was slim, tonic, a dancer body, but healthy, not extremely thin. Then I took weight, at list one size of clothes; I am not fat, the BMI is in the average, but I don't have no more a nice and enviable body; there are a lot of healthy girl very slimmer than me. And now I am not fine at all. So i just think that my feeling better was false, just because I had a nice body, then I took some kilos and everything went bad again... years and years up and down, a bit up and quickly a lot down... I just don't believe I will ever heal, I will ever get better... I don't have hope... thanks already for listening and letting me blow off steam
@91simo - I do think it's possible, but the how is hard to define since it's a little different for everyone. I also think there are stages of recovery - a big one is getting healthy body-wise so that you're at a healthy weight, eating healthily, etc. But there's another big piece that is around addressing where all these feelings and thoughts come from in the first place. If you heal only your body, then it's easy for the disorder to come back when things get stressful or your weight shifts a bit. Healing your mind, as well, and learning to love yourself no matter what is how you let go of it altogether.
If you ever want to chat or need some extra support, you're more than welcome to message me.
Take care
yesterday, all of had was 2 low calorie protien shakes.
@alexaners7734
Hello Alexander, hang in there, thank you for sharing.. perhaps finding some connection and perhaps inspiration through people that struggle with the feelings you experience could be an option worth exploring?.. be safe.. take care.. we are here :)
All I've ate today is some toast and a bowl of chips. I want to purge but my family is home so I'm just trying to avoid eating and doing as much exercise as possible. I feel like crap and already had to talk myself out of a panic attack.
@breegreen14 - On the other hand, you managed to talk yourself down from a panic attack, which is an enormous accomplishment and shows some great coping skills - way to go! I know it can be hard to have that feeling of panic when you want to purge but can't, but as hard as it is in the moment, it can also be a good way to fight those urges and practice good recovery.
None of this is easy, but I can hear from your post that you are strong and you're a fighter, and I know that you can get through this.
If you ever need to talk, you can always reach out and message me.
Take care
I keep telling myself I have to eat but I just can't do it. I am on many sports teams and I haven't really eaten that much in the past couple of days and it is starting to affect me. I don't know what to do. How do I push myself to eat? I'm doing this all by myself and I just feel so alone
@ms1999
Dear MS1999, I am sorry you feel alone. Reaching out to talk about how you feel is a great thing to do. Please know that you can beat this feeling. In all fairness it takes work, being brave and being ready to change what must be changed.. please be safe. If you feel like just talking we are here to listen. :)
@ms1999 - I know you feel alone, but you don't have to be - you have support here if you want it. You are always welcome to reach out to me or to any other listener.
As for how to push yourself, I find it helpful to start setting goals, but manageable ones. So don't try to get 100% there in one day, but instead figure out where you're at and push for a little closer each day. And reward yourself for meeting those goals - celebrate your successes and recognize that even 10% closer is still a huge accomplishment. And when you slip, it's okay to forgive yourself. It's important to understand why you slipped and think about how not to in the future, but then to let it go.
You said you're on several sports teams - how have you improved at those sports? It took a lot of practice, I imagine, and a lot of determination - those same things are true with recovery. It's goal setting, working determinedly towards those goals, being realistic, but tenacious, and pushing yourself.
And, of course, it can help to surround yourself with some extra motivation - making up a list of all the reasons why eating is important and what you get from it (more energy to perform better at sports, ability to connect with others over a shared meal, strength, etc.) and a list of things you find inspiring (affirmations, songs, etc.) can help push you when you're feeling less up to the challenge.
You can do this - I believe in you! And I'm always here if you need some extra support along the way.
i ate even tho i really didnt feel like it......
but, Y? Y did i have 2 eat breakfast????!!!???
i hate it! now as i type this, im regretting eating it!!!!
@alexaners7734
I weight a lil more today because i ate last night at a costume party. But im trying to just relax about it. (＞＜)
@starlitfairy
Really looking at these allow me to see myself in others as they post.
It makes me more aware of how pessimistic i became of myself even allowing a morsel of food to pass my lips.
I've used numerous of reasearch time and it has given me ideas.
As i am human. I still struggle with, beating down on myself for eating, to the point of starving.
Its about temperance once, i believe so once you get in tune with yourself and control your thoughts everything else surpasses.
Last night i ate a heck load of food (thank God i didnt frett as much) and the days prior, although they where healthy i couldnt bring myself from thoughts of where the weight were going.
Id even made a goal by
my birthday to be [edited by Anomalia to remove weight specifics / triggers] by 11/11
. Last week i was down to [edited], but my eating scroll back. And I've had binges .
I exercise though , when i can.
It can be upsetting i mean. But diet and exercise is all i can spure, because as starvation may be true. I recognized if you do it for too long not only the worry of the physical but also the instability of mentality and emotion of only worrying .
Make a fine line.
Portion off
Read, write, drawing, sing dance, hunger is like pshychological wave, you can ride it if let it pass.
Replace or restock your house with healthy foods.
Literally drink water before every meal
During and even after.
Talk or ask yourself questions.
Spoke alot but it is a touchy topic. Considering circumstances change but my goals dont.
@Centimeters
Thank you for the advice and insight. I think the big struggle is putting myself to exercise more and convince my dad to get more of my safe foods. Or to give me part of the money to buy my own groceries. Its just trying to find the motivation to do that.