Introduce yourself to the 7 Cups Eating Disorder Community!
Hi, my name is Christina! I'm 18 years old and I'm a sophomore in college studying biology in hopes of becoming a doctor. I have struggled with an eating disorder since I was in 8th grade. In 5th grade I was bullied for being "the chubby/fat kid". I ended up switching schools and did fine until I got in a relationship that was emotionally, sexually, and physically abusive. He told me that I needed to lose weight. My mother was also very pushy about what I ate and what I looked like. I needed to be perfect for her. I went into an intensive out patient program when I was 16 and got better but I recently relapsed. Before I had struggle mainly with bulimia but also deprived myself of food, but this time is different. I go on insane binges and I don't know how to stop. I feel like I've completely lost control of myself and I'm at my highest weight ever. As I'm writing this I'm sitting in the waiting room of my therapists office.
@calmskies1996 - it's so scary when you have felt better for a time and then you feel yourself slip back into your eating disorder, and while it's very common for eating disorders to morph over time from one to another, it can be really confusing and tough to deal with. But I think you're doing exactly the right thing - you're going to a therapist, you're reaching out here, you're putting things in place to get the help and support that you need.
When you recovered last time, what were some of the most helpful things, both in recovering and in staying recovered? Are there pieces that you can use again in this time?
You've done it before and you can do it again. You are crazy strong and you're getting help when you need it - you can get through this. Take care
I don't know what's wrong with me
I was in a really strict diet before summer and it was working fine but now i can't stop eating and i'm really scared of steping on the scale because i know i've Gained. I just want to stop eating and be thin and beautiful
aw honey, you're not the only one 
Thanks, i dont know what to do
@patientglobe8430 - First thing - forgive yourself. I think when things feel like they're not going how we want them to, we often put so much more pressure on ourselves to be perfect and it makes things worse. So be kind to yourself instead. Accept what happens and be forgiving with yourself. Then, try to isolate why it happens - are there particular times of day or things that trigger binges for you? What can you do to avoid them or be prepared going in? You can get through this. And you have so many people here who will help support you as you do. Take care
Hey y'all! I'm 19 years old and have been suffering with my eating disorder for around five years now. I have struggled with treatment because my family doesn't believe in my disorder and I used their disapproval as a reason to give up on treatment. I have returned to college and thought that things would be different, but unfortunately I'm still struggling. However, I believe that the first step is wanting to recover so I'm hoping that my mind set will help overcome my EDNOS.
@burninggirl - you are 100% right - wanting to recover is one of the biggest (and hardest) parts of recovery, so you are on the right track! It can be so hard when the people around you are denying that there's a problem instead of supporting you, so I'm sorry that it happened. I'll tell you - eating disorders are serious, and I believe you. I believe that you are struggling and that you need support. And you deserve support, treatment, love, and recovery.
Now that you're back on campus, are there resources you can reach out to for treatment? And how can we help support you through it?
You are strong and brave and can do this. I promise!
@Anomalia
I agree with everything you said here. For some reason, what you just wrote to @burningirl had some sort of impact on me. Perhaps because I deny my ED from time to time. I tend to think that it's "not that bad".. until my heart tweaks out, & experience shortness of breath.hah, then I freak out. Sick cycle
Burningirl- I wish you the very best in your recovery! Keep us posted =) and continue to reach out for support ;) <3
@SarAnn - I'm glad it was impactful for you. That was always one of my biggest issues - I would get in cycles of denying I had a problem at all, even when I clearly did, and that makes it so much tougher to heal. Take care in your recovery, as well!
@burninggirl - I really sympathize with your situation and I wish you all the best. I'm also a university student and my parents have some unconventional attitudes towards Western medicine and mental health care that have prevented me from reaching out or seeking treatment. I'm trying to work up the courage to find help with my ED once I'm back on campus.
Hello, I'm Delaney, I'm a 20 year old college student. I've always had some issues with anxiety and depression but never really had an issue with the way I looked until about 2 years ago. I went through a difficult break up and accidentally lost a lot of weight in a small amount of time due to stress. Suddenly, everyone I knew was telling me how amazing and skinny I looked, even though my doctor said I was underweight. Since then I've put on nearly twice as much weight as I had dropped and I have been struggling with bulimia for a year. The very, very few people in my life that know about my issues with food and body image really have no idea of the extent of it and I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I've lost my entire identity to this inner obsession with my weight and I just don't know how this happened.
@moonbaby9574 - It can be so scary to look back over a couple years and see how much has changed and how caught you've been in this cycle, especially when most people don't know what's going on. But you've made a huge and courageous step by reaching out here. There are loads of people who want to help support you in any way we can.
What have you tried so far to work towards recovery? Are there times that are easier or harder for you? Who is in your support system today?
So far, in terms of recovering, I've mostly done a lot of research on ways to help myself on the internet. Six weeks ago I started an exercise regimen that has helped me leaps and bounds in terms of feeling healthier and better about myself. I've managed to stick to it as well, which really helps my confidence because I feel like if I can complete this exercise program, I can complete recovery.
I've also started to drink TONS more water which helps me distinguish from when I'm thirsty and when I'm hungry, as I'm trying to pay more attention to my body. I try to only eat when I'm hungry and if I know that I'm going to be somewhere (work or class) for a while where I won't be able to eat, I will pack myself a healthy snack so I don't get ravenous and scarf down candy or chips, which would easily start a binge. Additionally, I'm trying to constantly mentally affirm myself- a technique I took out of my skim of the book Intuitive Eating. I constantly am trying to remind myself to not eat when I'm bored, that a binge will only make me feel worse about myself and that other people may not see the obese person that I see when I look in the mirror.
The hardest times for me are at night, especially if I'm stressed. I just don't know how to keep myself away from food after dinner and I have a hard time distinguishing between hungry and tired. In the mornings and right after exercise are the easiest times for me, even though I'm often hungry after exercise I usually only eat until I'm full and don't feel any anxiety or shame because it feels like my body needs it.
Right now, I have only one friend who knows the extent of the issue but she's been very busy with work and I haven't spoken to her about it in a few months. My stepmother knows I'm struggling with my body image but thinks I quit binging/purging a long time ago.
Hi I'm 16 And I live in taiwan
I started suffering from anorexia three years ago and it turned into bulimia about two and a half years ago
i haven't been to the doctors because I don't want to be out on drugs that makes me drowsy
i want to become a doctor in the future but med school is very hard to get into
my family found out about my problem about 2 years ago
and my mom threatens me to not let me go to school if I keep purging
but I continued and shone how I am still enrolled at school
but lately she threatened that tp she will commit suicide if she found me purging again
and two days ago she did.... She took a ton of pills. And well."........at least she's still alive right now
but she says that won't be the last time
she says that it is I who is driving her to commit suicide.....
pls I really need help........I can't let anyone else know I have this problem
because they will only treat me like I'm an alien
even my boyfriend don't know.... Because once I brought it up to see what his reaction would be and he said that it was very sick.......so I told him it wasn't happening to me.....
@Sharon9812 I am so so sorry about your mum. I wish she was supportive rather than blackmailing. Blackmailing never solves the problem, it just either makes you more stubborn to keep doing it or just masks the problem but your mindset has not changed. If you don't want to talk to a professional about it, try to challenge your thoughts about why you need to purge. There are some helpful CBT worksheets online that can help you with it. Set yourself targets to stop purging, start with a day, then 2 then 3 and just keep trying to beat it for just one more day. If you purge, don't think of it as a failure, it's going to happen so just try to accept that it has happened and challenge yourself again. You can't change it if you do purge but you can use it as a target to beat. Write down why you want to stop purging and what your life would be like if you carried on purging and if you stopped. Look at the consequences of purging and use this to spur you on to get better. You can do this ok? You are amazing. It isn't easy and it takes time but I promise you it will be worth it. You have taken a big step talking to people on here about what's going on and you should be so proud of yourself. Don't give up, beautiful! We are all right behind you, cheering you on 
@Sharon9812
First of all, an eating disorder doesn't only destroy you, but you whole family. But that doesn't mean that you are the main reason your mom tried to commit suicide, even if she said so. I think your mom has some other issues too, but she certainly cares so much about you, that she can't stand to see you suffer. My mother threatened the same, that she can't live any longer if I keep purging, binging and restricting. Your mother is hurt, but so are you, darling. You're hurting the most, and I think that suffering has to stop. Do you think that too? I know from experience that eating disorders are a rare topic in Asia and Africa, but many people suffer from them there too. But darling, do you want to get better yourself? Do you think you can ask her to search help for you? I won't judge you if you're not ready to get help, but I highly recommend you to talk to someone close to you, which you feel comfortable with and trust. But if you want to get better, and get good help, I think it would be good to take your mom with you to appointments, so she can understand that you are not having an eating disorder to wreck her life, you are having a problem that is wrecking your life, for no reason, because you don't deserve this, and I bet you never begged on you knees to God to give you anorexia or bulimia. If you can, explain to your mom how this feels for you, you sickness, the pressure you feel, and the things she says. But more importantly, be honest. Being honest is so hard! But so helpful! All this lying for your disorder got you to this point, a point you don't want to be standing. Maybe if you replace the lies for honesty, things will work out a whole lot differently! You'll be breaking the stigma, and actively work on getting better: Getting your life back and a better bond with your mother. Think about what you want lovely Sharon, do you want to stay stuck, or want to move on? However, we are here for you, and I want you to be save and help you. So if you need my help: Send me a message. Take care! <3
I've been battling my eating disorder (bulimia to anorexia b/p subtype) for 7 years now. In January of this year, I hit an all time low and I decided it was my time to recover. It's not easy and I still struggle some days. I've not only put on some weight, but I've also started incorporating fear foods of mine in my diet. I'm close to a healthy BMI now and I'm determined to get there. Would be nice to make friends who can relate and show support and of course I'd do the same
I'm so glad your recovery is going well! I know it's not always smooth sailing, but you should be so so proud of how far you've come. You can go further and accomplish so much. Kick some ED ass.
@achickennugget - WOOHOO!!! So proud of you for working towards recovery - that's fantastic! This is a good place to find others also working on recovery, and I also really enjoyed going to support groups to meet others who understood and to celebrate victories with them.
My name is Haley, I'm 15 and a lot of the time I binge then purge and it's become a very big problem as it's been going on for a little over a year. The only person that knows is my boyfriend and he's been very supportive and is trying to help me but I'm not quite sure if I can stop.
@CavernsAbove - reaching out here is a big step, and I'm proud of you. It's not easy to stop, but it is possible, and you can do it. Have you considered telling anyone else so that you can get additional support or talking to a counselor to get more professional help? The bigger your support network, the easier recovery becomes. take care!
Hi I'm Mary. I've been struggling with Anorexia for 3 years now. Everyday it gets harder but everyday I get stronger. I hope to beat this ED soon. Best wishes for all of you going through the same thing
Hello and welcome! I'm new too and still trying to figure everything out here. I suffered from binge eating and sometimes still struggle with it. It was hard but I was able to overcome it. Feel free to talk to me if you want/need.
Hi everyone, I am Sheila.
I am fifteen and diagnosed with Bulimia three years ago. Over the time it got worse and worse. I've become isolated, underweight, hospitalized, went inpatient, judge involved, not being able to go to school... Honestly I feel horrible, nobody understands my feelings, and my family makes me feel awful by not understanding and joking about my situation. I'm falling apart, and I am hoping that someone will be willing to help me put myself back together... Of course I am also here to support others, don't hesitate to talk to me, I really want to help you all out (: Stay strong and safe!
@NewFelicity - I'm sorry that you're struggling so much and don't feel you have people around you who understand - that's so important to have as part of recovery. You are more than welcome to reach out to me (if you hover over my name, you should be able to message me directly) if you need someone to talk to. I also found that in my recovery, support groups were a huge element for me - it gave me a chance to surround myself with people who had been or were where I was, understood, and didn't judge for any of it. Listening to others talk about their experiences and feelings helped me better understand and articulate my own and being surrounded by a supportive group who really knew the challenges I was facing was an enormous relief after time with so many people who cared but didn't truly get it.
Take care - you can get through this and this community is here to help support you.
@Anomalia , Your comment really makes me smile, and also cry a bit, but in a very good manner. I am so touched to hear that if I want to I can message you and that there are people out there who understand, and are willing to listen. Because I gave up on that idea, that hope that someone would know what I'm going through and not judge. It is so hard to get out of this when no-one truly gets how tangled up you are in your situation, that nobody seems to get that it suffocates you but you're so addicted to it, or too scared, not strong enough, or for an other reason can't change it. People judge you because of that (or at least the people around me here do), and that makes everything even worse. I hope you're right, and I'll look for support groups here. Thank you so much for your kindness, and I will message you soon (:
Hi, I'm Natasha, I'm 15, and I've been struggling with anorexia for three years. I feel like I have lost many parts of my life due to this disorder. I am working hard towards a permanent recovery, but I know that it will be very challenging. My love goes out to all of you!
@Cheskia - I'm so happy to hear that you are working towards recovery right now. You're right that it will be challenging and it's going to take time, but you can get there and you have a whole beautiful life ahead of you when you do! Feel free to reach out anytime if you need some extra support, and let us know how you're doing along the way! Take care, sweetie!
Just wanted to say that our hearts go out to you too, please know you're not alone