Abusive parents
Hi. I am 30 and always dealt with abusive parents since childhood. But Their behaviour lately has become worrying and I am having recurrent suicidal thoughts.
I will try to keep it short but I don't think it will be easy cause my family story is complicated.
Basically I took my law degree 3 years ago. Here in Italy becoming a lawyer is no easy task. Law school lasts 5 years or more (depending on what kind of thesis you decide to choose,too).
After that, you have to become a trainee lawyer for almost 2 years , in order to have access to a test that will eventually make of you a lawyer. This means that most of people actually are able to work when they are in theit late 20s/early 30s.
I unfortunately failed mine but ever since that I tried to find a job while getting ready for the next test. During this last year and a half I worked for a law firm that barely ever gave me any money+worked as a journalist for a local magazine. They don't pay me enough but at least I earn some money.
I tried my best. And I am still trying my best.
Plus, I am now studying to become a state official. I am on books 6 hours a day cause you need an exam to be one. I am trying all the ways that I have to find a damn job.
Despite all this, my parents are daily screaming at me, telling me I have to get out of their house and start living with my money cause they just can't stand me anymore.
They tell me I am useless , worthless, that I never in my life accomplished anything good.
Never asked to them any money. I maybe not earning much as a journalist, but what I earn is enough to pay for myself.
We all live in a big house , it's 3 stairs and I live in the apartment downstairs.
I don't know why they came up with this thing that I gotta leave 'their' house. My father is a teacher in retirement and even though we are not rich, they have no reason to talk to me like that.
I see my coworkers living with parents and their parents being supportive and always helping them out, even financially. And this thing is slowly killing me.
Help me .
I am in a dark place and see no solutions 😔
@ElectronicDreamer
Hey,
I am so sorry to hear how much you are going through, it feels like you have
the weight of the world on your shoulders.
Things sound stressful enough without the added stress and hurt from your
parents. I've been through abuse myself and I know the horrible devastating
effects it can have on us... thoughts being one.
The law stuff all sounds a bit complicated to me, a 16 year old from another
country! But I understand enough and can hear in your writing how hard you have
tried and are trying and how hurtful and disheartening it must be to hear them
say thingd like you are useless and worthless.
It may not mean a lot coming from me but I want to assure you you are far from
useless and worthless. So far from.
It sounds like although you have enough money to pay for yourself, thr small
amount you are getting from your jobs has got to be worrying you?
Wishing you the best of luck for your next test and whatever you pursue in the
future. Trying your best is enough.
Stay strong.
(I hope I could help by providing a listening ear... it's always here for you.
:) )
