Conflict with Step Mom

I moved in with my dad and step mom about 4 months ago after I graduated college and got a job in their city. I plan on staying here until I get a pay raise after a year, then I want to move out on my own. I have never fully gotten along with my step mom. Growing up, I’d come to visit my dad for school breaks, holidays, etc. She was always very controlling of me, for example wouldn’t let me wear certain things out of the house (for context, it was nothing that was age-inappropriate, it was just “weird” stuff like leggings with cat heads on it, because I was an eccentric teenager) because it embarrassed her. She would call me ugly because of the colors I liked to dye my hair (blue, pink, purple, any color of the rainbow). She’s always had something negative to say about me. I like to stay up late and sleep in late, and in her eyes that means I’m lazy and irresponsible. I didn’t want to work a job while I was in college because I wanted to focus on school, that also meant that I’m lazy and irresponsible. I now have a great job that I love, and I’m currently teleworking because of the pandemic. She comes home before I’m off the clock, and she gets mad when she sees me still in my pajamas as I’m working. She’s also very controlling of my dad. She won’t let him wear certain things, cut his hair any other way than it is now, or buy a car in his favorite color because she thinks it’s ugly. Really just petty stuff. There are many other instances similar to these that have happened all throughout my life (her and my dad got married when I was seven). I thought I was doing a good job at letting all of that stuff go, even though she still bothers me every now and then about something. Until tonight… What started out as a joke (or at least I thought) at dinner turned into an argument. I made a comment about how I don’t have any money (even though I do, I’ve been saving all I can since I started working). She asked me where all of my money was going, and I still was joking around and said “none of your business”. She then gets defensive and says that it is her business as I am living in her home. Mind you, I’m paying rent to them and my dad offered me to stay with them for as long as I’d like. I told her that the only thing she should be concerned about is if I’m paying rent and that I’m free to do whatever I want with the rest of my paycheck. She then threatened to increase how much I pay for rent. I got so angry, and totally shut down and have not spoken to her the rest of the night. I also feel I may have overreacted a little bit at and became unnecessarily dramatic, but it really just triggered all of the resentment I have towards her and I let my emotions get the best of me. My dad did not hear any of this going on. I really need to talk to him and tell him what happened, as it really just brought back all of my unresolved and hurt feelings from all these past years. Yet, I’m scared, because in the past he has always taken her side simply because he doesn’t want to cause tension with her. I avoid confrontation at all costs, but I feel that it’s time to let him know how she has made me feel tonight and all of these years growing up. I’m just scared and don’t know what to do. I don’t want to cause tension between them, or between me and my dad.