Parent issues
Hello everyone this is more of like a vent/ to see if I’m just being a overactive teenager. I am the eldest daughter in my family, however I am not the oldest. I have three older brothers, who haven’t really done a good job at being older siblings. So I’ve carried the weight of the older sibling on my back since I was maybe twelve. Recently my mother and I have been butting heads A LOT. The worst thing I’ve done is walk out the house without permission when we got in a heated fight. My brothers have done WAY worse and yet I’m always the one being chewed out for EVERYTHING I do. She mad because I’m moody and tired all the time. (I’m 16, what 16 yr old isn’t moody) And I don’t get it. Am I overreacting and just being a disrespectful teen or is my mom in the wrong?
@alexroma
Hey there!
I'm glad that you found this safe space to vent!
Of course, we don't give advice but I can share with you from my experiences and maybe that will be helpful. I think that sometimes in families the order of siblings doesn't reflect the level of responsibility. I think sometimes one sibling stands out as the most mature, most responsible and takes of the 'leader' role. I was that one in my family and it sounds like you are that one in your family as well.
I think the headbutting with mom is part of being a teen. It seems that boys usually deal with it with dad and girls usually deal with it with mom. It may be a parent's way of wanting their teen to grow in the direction that they want them to grow. To be honest, I've never quiet figured out why parents do this with otherwise good kids.
Based only on the wording that you used in your post, it seems to me that you are trying to be a respectful daughter. It sounds to me like you are in a stage of mentally growing from teen into young adult. There can be times when you and mom / dad don't see eye to eye or disagree. Building communication with them may help to bridge the gap during those times.
I hope that something here brings you comfort!
~ Sher CML/F&C
@alexroma I don't really have a good relationship with my parents, but I felt like these conflicts stem from the parent wanting to protect your safety through control/punishment. Maybe if you kind of "take the high road" in terms of expressing that you are responsible and want to be able to go out more and see friends to work on homework or hobbies but will still check-in.