Mental exhaustion
I'm mentally exhausted, very unhappy and feeling like i'm losing grip. I need advice.
@littleLychee8016
Mental exhaustion can be so weighing.
Sorry you're experiencing that<3
It's important to look after yourself in these times and listen to what your body needs.
Sleep, eat, and self-care💛💫
Hi @littleLychee8016,
Did something recently happen in your life or is there an ongoing issue? Would you like to talk about it? [It is fine if you do not wish too, or if you prefer not to give details].
I can relate to feeling mentally exhausted, I've had a tumultuous past couple of years that built up.
What I've been doing to "get a grip" or at least feel OK are:
✤Going for walks in the cool evening with earbuds on to listen to music.
✤Taking cold refreshing showers or warm relaxing showers (depending on time of day, I live in a desert type of climate).
✤Journaling, doodling[haven't really "drawn" anything in awhile, just doodles...], writing to distract myself.
✤Once in a blue moon, I will play or compose music. I do a lot of karaoke nowadays to make up for it... I was a(n amateur) musician at one point of my life, but it feels painful/emotional sometimes to play music...
✤Taking naps/going to sleep early.
✤Doing self care [ex. Showering, fixing my hair after, grooming my nails, washing my face, eating healthy foods/drinking water, go get my eyebrows done-- sometimes nails, etc]
✤Distract myself with other hobbies [ex. Language learning, computer programming, etc etc]
✤And lastly spending time with my son or loved ones if he's currently with his father.
Take care Lychee, I wish you the best!
Thank you for your kind words and advice, I appreciate it ❤
Get ready cause it's a long story!
I lost my father almost 3 years ago, ever since i've turned off my feelings. I lost all motivation especially regarding college, I feel like quitting but can't because of some financial obligations. Nothing inspires me anymore, I don't what to do with my life after college. Thinking, even about the littlest thing, has become a very huge task for my brain and very draining when I do. I'm like a robot doing things cause I have to.
I also share an appartment with a girl who I thought was my friend, turns out over time I realized that she's in a secret competition with me (who dresses the nicest, who gets more attention around friends, who has the most number of friends, etc). So I distanced myself because it's childish and draining, however I kept things very cordial with her.
Ever since her brother moved in her attitude changed, she's been very shady, she keeps avoiding me on purpose and do other things to make me feel unwanted/unwelcome in the appartment because she's pissed that she has to share her bedroom with her brother so she's doing all this to make me move out so that her brother can take my room.
The worst part is that she's dirty af : she wears the same clothes every week but hasn't washed them for 4 years, she only showers once a week, she never cleans the house whenever I do it she has no respect for my efforts.
She acts like a baddie on social media, she's down to spend 40€ for a makeup palette but can't spend 4€ to wash her clothes. To make matters worse, her dirty belongings are scattered all around the appartment which makes it smell bad af.
Unfortunately I can't move out because I don't have money to do so, idk if it's the right term but i'm in a Stockholm Syndrome mode until I find a way out of here.
With all this covid thing I haven't seen my family in almost 3 years cause they live at 9000 kilometres away which makes me sooo depressed.
I am so sorry for this paragraph, I really needed to let this all out. Thank you for taking the time to read it. ❤️
Oooof, that is a frustrating situation to be in and i can relate a bit!
I live (temporarily) at my older brother's house, and my younger brother USED to live there, has his own place, but stays nearly EVERYDAY here. He is messy, like your roommate, has gone without washing his clothes for a YEAR including blankets. Also hardly showers, but when he does, he still wears the SAME STINKY clothes.
He also used MY STUFF when I called him out SEVERAL times not too. He's usually too fucked up and incoherent to understand anything, either drunk or coked out...parties a lot...
I also do not have money right now until I pay off some debt --- which one of those debts is an eviction that happened (long story).
My only suggestion is to tough it out for a bit and save, save, SAVE as much money as you can to move out. I don't really have much friends here in this city (that have space anyways...), and similar to you, my family lives far away... In a different country... I'm not very close to them anymore though.
If you are close to your family/friends that live far away, you could consider it as a plan B or plan C if plan A is taking a while...
Plan B could be taking out a loan to allow you to move out of the apartment sooner[but make sure you also have a game plan to pay that off]. I'm in debt, so I can't take out loans until I pay off my collections.
I ended up calculating how long it'll take me to pay off eviction and have been doing a lot of overtime to pay it off. I've been slowly, but surely getting it done. Just throw in a $100 at a time if you need to, in your savings account. Calculate how much it would cost in order to break lease and apply for XYZ apartment.
I wish you luck friend, i can definitely relate to your situation, as I am in a similar-ish situation.
On the subject of your father I can relate. I lost him in 2020, not to covid but in the middle of covid which was stressful enough. He passed from cancer of the colon and I had to care for him during the summer, and go right back to work. At first, work was welcome distraction. I'm a teacher, so I just found the way to deal with things by getting more involved in work. But because I never fully dealt with losing my father, my work as a teacher started to grind on me mentally and emotionally. So I relate to feeling trapped, that kind of robot feeling you describe. In my case, a lot of my inner dialogue, mostly negative, sometimes fills out of me at the worst possible times. This is endangered my position at work, because it makes me seem less than professional. On the topic of living with a person who isn't suited to you, I live with my ex, father of my child. He is a functioning alcoholic, but not highly functioning. He's not very good with finances and I am the major breadwinner in my household. I wouldn't call our relationship a loving one, but he is family, and my daughter loves him although it hurts her to see him continue to indulge in alcohol and become more unhealthy as time goes on. My daughter's probably close to your age, she's about 23. She has anxiety and issues of her own, but she's a strong woman and I'm very proud of her. I remind her of that everyday. She and I have come almost more like best friends than mother and daughter, but I will always be her mom. But lately everything that I do seems pointless, and stress of the way the world is and my work is finally getting into my brain in a way that is not healthy. I feel disconnected although I have a small group of friends, family nearby. So I understand what it's like to feel disconnected, but I've never lived that far away from family and friends so I can only imagine how awful that must feel. The best thing I can say to support you please don't be afraid to change things up. I literally went to school three times before I found my interest and career. And now at the age of 57, after 15 plus years of teaching, I'm not sure that I want to continue. And that's life! We have to pivot, and be brave enough to face change, decide to go to school or not go to school, change jobs, move or even just get up in the morning. I think the secret is to find a passion, anything that makes you feel alive. This always seems impossible at first, because of responsibilities and what we view as what others will think of us. But finding a passion or interest beyond mere survival is just as important if not more than any job or any amount of schooling. So just make one brave choice a day, when incremental change for the better. Soon it will all add up to something that will help you move on to better things in your life. Good luck!
@littleLychee8016 you are the coach of your life, i can see how its difficult to feel that way i have experienced those feelings and till now sometime i experience them , you are not alone we are with you , everyone recovers in different ways some feel like when they exercise they becomes better, others reading works for them, others listenning to music, playing musical instruments, writing , being in nature, so everyone is different ...
@littleLychee8016
Sorry that u r experiencing this.
Always remembers that your own health (mentally & physically) always comes first, take a short break from what's stressing u out!
Hope this help!
@littleLychee8016 I get it, i have depression not saying that u have it. but on days like this i talk to someone online about the things that i cant tell anyone else until i get the relief i need, then i listen to happy songs because they tend to lift me up unlike sad songs. I also tend to lack energy/interest for simple tasks like cooking or even playing video games, I try to do it along with stimulation like listening to a funny video on the background or just happy music, this tends to make the task easier to complete. I know it's hard and i hate it whenever ppl tell me to move on because they think it's easy, but please don't give up.
