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A SCRATCHPAD

User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle March 15th

Not sure what to put here.... just getting started.

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User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP March 15th

@mytwistedsoul, 

Hey man, (how ya doing?),  so i started the scratchpad but we can always adjust to a new version.

You know, we were talking about that story about dopamine and the more I thought about it the more I realized that that was actually, Like the ending, or the beginning I guess you could say of a long fought journey for me.

I think it was such a powerful realization for me, because it made sense and I've been struggling for so many years trying to do the right thing ah blah blah blah i'm just rambling now.

Anyway was it life realization for me, especially for the past month. 

I guess I'm not really sure where to start at the topic. At the beginning or at the end or just anywhere.

I'll just start anywhere right now. I guess there are drugs out there that simulate dopamine or actually have dopamine in them because it helps with moods but I don't think that's the same as building your own dopamine. That's my opening statement. lol. 

Oh yea this is just the scrach pad for ideas 😁

15 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul March 16th

@IsayUncle Hey thanks for starting this space. 😀 I'm looking forward to learning more about this. I definitely know that my reward system is either broken or non-existent. 


I've seen a lot of things online for patches and supplements but there's not a whole lot of proof that they actually work. And I prefer a more natural or homeopathic approach to things. I remember you mentioned diet and how that can raise dopamine levels

It's been so long or maybe never, since I've felt motivated or any pleasure from anything. Anything that resembles happiness is so fleeting. I do what has to be done because someone has to do it lol

What led you to this discovery? 


14 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP March 17th

@mytwistedsoul
peace-out-peace-sign.gif 😊

13 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul March 18th

@IsayUncle 

awesome-job.gif


12 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP March 18th

@mytwistedsoul

Hi, I think your previous comments are good for starting the actual thread, what you think?

You had some good title suggestions. i forgot what they were. it was funny. mine would be dry.

like.... DOPAMINE - WITH TWIST AND UNC. 

or mybe repetitive LET'S TALK WITH TWIST AND UNC..... SUBJECT.... (This way, the title is always the same at the start, and then the changing subject for each thread.

I stumbled on this discovery from years of trying to understand it and then starting a converstion with "AI" about it. It hit everynail on the head about my past and the reasons why i think the way i do now.

The winning part is that we CAN REBUILD OUR DOPAMINE MACHINE... and i am the proof that it is working. BUT... THE BIG BUT is.... i'm still using many of the techniques and disciplines i've been practicing for the past 6 years. The mindset and mood has changed for the better.

We should start the thread. So much to talk about and learn. 


11 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul March 21st

@IsayUncle I'll have to look and see what they were 😂 I don't remember either. 🤪

I'll try to work on it this weekend but I can't make any promises. My closest neighbor has been having some health issues and I've been helping out with what I can when I can

10 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP March 22nd

@mytwistedsoul

That's cool. I think our project can be good for ourselves and others.

I'm glad we both seem comfortable with the snails pace at the moment. 😜🐌. We both have things going on.

Helping out a neighbor with health issues is a pretty big deal. (Serious issue?) I'm sure it's beneficial for them and they probably really appreciate it. 💖👍

9 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul March 27th

@IsayUncle Talk about a snails pace 😅 I'm sorry this week has been hectic. With the neighbor guy, he was supposed to have a stimulation thing put in to help with leg pain he was having. The night before his leg went completely numb. He went to the hospital the next morning for the surgery but told them what happened the night before. The canceled the surgery but ran a bunch of tests. He had a CT scan. He barely had a pulse in one of his feet. Turns out he has blockages in both legs. So he's got to have surgery for those but it's slow going right now because they have him going to a bunch of different doctors. His age is a big issue too. 


Back to thread though 😅 So for a title - 

"An engaging topic with Unc and Twist" Let's talk about - Dopamine, the myth, the legend! 

Dopamine is a crucial neurotransmitter and hormone, often called the "feel-good" chemical" It acts as a messenger between nerve cells, powering the brain's reward system, motivation, pleasure, and motor control. It reinforces survival behaviors (like eating) by creating pleasure, but also influences learning, mood, attention, and sleep. Think of it like Brain Candy. Everyone likes candy, right?

When dopamine levels are low some symptoms can be :
Lack of motivation, “the drive.”
Tired
Poor concentration 
Moodiness or anxiousness 
No pleasure from previously enjoyable experiences.
Depression and/or feelings of hopelessness 


I'm not sure if I should add more or just end with an open question. What are your thoughts? 

8 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul March 27th

Do you think the general community is the place for this? 


7 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP March 30th

@mytwistedsoul

Heeeey, I was really looking forward to having a good sit down with you. I'm behind the 8 ball at every turn lately, but it's a good thing. I'm actually functioning and taking on more responsibilities. I'm still in the game though, Just got to navigate Through some new waters.

As far as the community goes, I'm not really sure. It'll be fine in general community and we will be talking about a lot of different topics.

but.....

I have a feeling The things that we'll be talking about will be geared more towards advancement and improvement, More than just general acceptance.... But I don't really know. General acceptance is extremely important early on in the struggle..... and that could be a topic too. 😊. What do you think... second thoughts are ok.

I'm really sorry to hear about your neighbors hardships. Hopefully after some surgeries he gets back on his feet again. Are you OK getting as involved as you are? He definetly needs someone.

I really like your entire thread introduction. The title and the content is really good.
Ending it with an open ended question sounds like a good way of Involvement, that's a good idea.

I wonder if saying something like, "This is a podcast type thread With unc & twist. Please join us with your thoughts and conversation"

To actually have other people go back and forth with productive conversation might be a little bit much for this site. (I find this site is mostly one liners for support) But maybe, that's why it could be good for me and you to be the foundation of a conversational type thread. 

looking forward to a new week and i hope you are too! hope you are doing well.

6 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 2nd

@IsayUncle I'm at snails pace again lol 😅 Hey no worries ok? We'll get things ironed out. I don't know if we have an area for advancement or improvement 😬 Maybe keep it in the motivation and accountability community? 


"An engaging topic with Unc and Twist" Let's talk about - Dopamine, the myth, the legend! 

This is a podcast type thread With Unc & twist. Please join us with your thoughts and conversations! 

Dopamine is a crucial neurotransmitter and hormone, often called the "feel-good" chemical" It acts as a messenger between nerve cells, powering the brain's reward system, motivation, pleasure, and motor control. It reinforces survival behaviors (like eating) by creating pleasure, but also influences learning, mood, attention, and sleep. Think of it like Brain Candy. Everyone likes candy, right?

When dopamine levels are low some symptoms can be :
Lack of motivation, “the drive.”
Tired
Poor concentration 
Moodiness or anxiousness 
No pleasure from previously enjoyable experiences.
Depression and/or feelings of hopelessness 

 Can you think of a time you were highly motivated to get something (like food, a sale item, or a social media "like") but felt little pleasure once you actually got it? You're welcome to share if you're comfortable 😊

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User Profile: WarmChat
WarmChat April 5th

@IsayUncle

100%


User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 7th

@IsayUncle I'm hoping by next month it's ok because I have a camping trip planned. Yogi and I are heading into the Monongahela forest in the Appalachians. Should be interesting with the little man along 😅


I wanted to get to that post yesterday but ended up getting busy with a bunch of little things and then time slipped away. Sometimes I think I need more hours to my day or maybe just better time management 🤪 I think it was an awesome start! (high fives!)


Oh that's a good idea! I didn't think of that. The different colors works and I don't mind green at all 😄


With the belts... could there be a misalignment? Even a small one can really throw things off. Is there any wobble in anything that might throw things off? Maybe bad bearings in a pulley? Maybe a bad water pump bearing? I hope you get it figured out soon. I know it can be frustrating trying to narrow it down 😕 And I'm just making guesses 😅

Neighbor guy seems to be doing alright. He's got appointments for a few things but it seems like it's taking so long to get them. That bothers me a little tbh. Im trying to have some faith in the doctors and that they know what they're doing 😅

Lol! Puppy is doing good! He's housebroken and listens fairly well. Still needs to get better at his recall. He gets distracted easily but I figure that's because he's still got a baby brain lol

5 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 11th

@mytwistedsoul

That is so cool about the camping trip. And with Yogi. OMG, that is gonna be awesome.

Just a forethought, because I just discovered the use of training collars recently. I don't know if you've ever used them, and a lot of people stay away from them because they're called shock collars.

But I had to look into them, to try to train my dogs chasing things in the street, especially bicyclists.

What I learned about them is they are training collars. I never had to go beyond the beep beep, the little sound mechanism. They're not supposed to be used as punishment but as a reward system. The little beep beep, kind of confused them and stops them doing whatever they're doing but if they know that there's treat at the end of the beep beep they come running to you for retreat. 

I only mention this because I often wondered what I would do with my dogs if I went camping with them. Is Yogi used to a leash. I made the mistake never training my dogs on the leash, so they go nuts if I hook them up to a tether. They wouldn't take long to train them on a leash or a tether, but I just can't seem to find the time.

Anyway I think your camping trip is gonna be great. I hope you have fun with Yogi. 

I'm glad that your neighbor is doing well, and sadly the doctor appointment thing is the new normal. It is worrisome, but if you got a good doctor, then everything will work out well.

 


4 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 15th

@IsayUncle I've never used those collars. I remember you mentioning a while back about them chasing bike riders. That makes sense. If the beep is associated with good things like a treat then they would come to you for that. And the sound would make them refocus their attention on that rather than chasing bikers. 


Yogi is used to a leash and a harness. I just got him a heavy duty harness because sometimes with hiking and camping I come across some rough climbing and wanted to make sure he has sturdy supportive equipment. He's not to crazy about the boots so hopefully we don't have to have them on too much. 

I'm looking forward to taking him but I'm also a little nervous too. I would hate to have him get hurt or lost. Although I'm thinking of getting him a gps tracker just in case. 

3 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 16th

@mytwistedsoul

WOW, You are really prepared with Yogi. That's awesome. Rough terrain hiking and having a leash and the harness strong enough to pull up out of a dangerous situation is super smart. (not sure about the boots) 🤣.

I think those collars got a bad rap, when years ago, They were labeled as "shock collars". Maybe way back then they were just shock collars but nowadays, they have beepers on them and vibration way before any shock is needed. The appropriate name now is Training Collars and at first I thought that was just a marketing rephrase or ploy.

I was shocked 😁, When I saw how quickly they worked for training. For my first dog it was immediate. I never set that thing above the very first beeping sound on the controller, Now whether I have food or not he comes running cow toed to me as soon as I hit that beeper he comes running right back to me. But I always try to have food.

My second dog, He is kind of like a big dumb oaf, reacted in the same manner but a bit more confused as he was looking around for the beeping sound. It was funny. He's kind of an oaf, deaf dumb and blind, to verbal commands. But he'll come right to me when I push that beeper. 

Until I got one, and read the instructions I didn't realize that it was the reward system that makes them work. Not punishment.

GPS tracker sounds like another great idea, especilly, being out and about.

I'm excited for you and Yogi YAY 🎉😃

2 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 20th

@IsayUncle Yeah tbh Idk about the boots either. I think I'll just let him be barefoot because I think he'd have better grip. I did just order him a gps for his collar just in case we'd get separated. It uses satellites because a lot of the time there's no cell service at all. 


I think they did get a bad rap just because of the name and I know some of them have that you can remove the prongs that give the shock. And hey if they associate the beep with a reward that's the way to go for sure! Makes me wonder if that's what you and I need for that reward system rebuild 😂 Just kidding of course 😂
1 reply
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 20th

@mytwistedsoul

LOL 🤣

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User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 14th

@mytwistedsoul

Hey Twist, I hope It's ok to share, that I'm starting to slip into a deep depression. It's always a seesaw. 

What do you think about starting another thread with Unk and Twist, Pulling ourselves from the brink. OR NOT, and then, how long do we suffer?

If yes, and this is something you're familiar with, can you do the title and introduction?

I'm struggling bro..... time to fight..... 4 days, shut down..... Very discouraged about the advertisements on the site...... thinking about leaving alltogether (Not life, but the site 😞) ...... but that's the depression talking (mostly)

I'm just rambling And really shouldn't commit to nothing right now. I just thought it was a good topic about, how do people pull themselves up out of the pits?. How long does it, how long does it last, and how do we end up back in the same place. How tired do we get up doing the same things we keep our heads above water. For me I know I have to address eating habits. And when it was first and get back to staying disciplined. I'm so tired all the time.

That's enough of my woe woes for the moment. 😁. How's things treating you and Yogi this week?


8 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 14th

@IsayUncle Hey, of course it's ok to share this. Tbh I've been fighting the same. It started Friday night and has been lingering. I'm doing my best to keep it from spiraling. We can definitely do a thread like that! Let me give it some thought and I'll work something up. I'll drop it here so you can proof read it and then I'll post it 


I do understand about the ads. I can understand the need to generate revenue here but I didn't think it would be so intrusive or overwhelming 😞 I see so many ads that just seem so wrong for a mental health site. And sometimes I can't help but take a step back and think whoa that's not right. I saw your post on the forum functionality thread. 

Ramble away ok? This can be space for whatever we need it to be. I'll see what I can come up with for a thread. Hang tight! We'll get through this 

4 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 14th

Let me know your thoughts Uncle :)


Unc and Twist, "Pulling Ourselves from the Brink (OR NOT): The Exhausting Cycle of Depression"

I know this is a common topic. Hopefully this space can offer comfort and ideas to others, as well as ourselves.

There's times it feels like we're hanging by a thread. Everything is going well and then suddenly it's not. Sometimes it's a gradual drop and sometimes it's sudden. 

Depression feels like a constant, heavy weight. It’s like walking through life carrying this immense. Logically you might know that you have good things in life, but your brain refuses to let you feel them. It’s exhaustion that sleep cannot fix.

Depression lies. It tells you that you are a burden, that no one cares, and that this pain is permanent.

It is lying to you. The truth is, your mind is currently incapable of seeing the good options, not that they don't exist.

Sometimes depression just seems to constantly be there. Maybe we work through it at one point only to be blindsided by it again. How do some people seem to manage to pull themselves out of the pit of misery and how do they recognize the signs that they're slipping back into it? 


Let's talk about the brink of depression—and how to pull away from it. 

Everyone is welcome to join in. If you're comfortable, feel free to share your story and experiences.



3 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 14th

@mytwistedsoul

Thanks for making me feel comfortable venting. Like you said, Maybe this is a good place for both of us sometimes. I did better today.

I like your previous title of, An engaging topic with Unc & Twist. It seems more inviting just Unc & Twist. or something like, "Yakkity Yak With Unc & Twist: (TOPIC) (Clever and Real punchline), You're good with those. 

Just thinking a consistent title could be cool..... and then the topic. does it really matter, or better to mix it up? IDK.

Everything else looks really good! AND WHAAAAT u gonna post this one? 

ok-okay.gif
Twist my Arm.... 😁. thx.

So yeah, You say you're feeling a bit spongy too. (sorry) It's like you say, Hard to get on solid ground even though we know how easy it is and it's right there in front of us.. But sometimes it's tough.

What do you do sometimes to get past it or get through it?

2 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 15th

@IsayUncle You're welcome! Anytime ok? Good point! We can use the -


Engaging topic with Unc and Twist - Pulling Ourselves from the Brink (OR NOT): The Exhausting Cycle of Depression" Although I have to admit I kind of like Yakkity Yak too. Or Eat, Sleep, Exist, Repeat: A Guide to Doing Absolutely Nothing Productively 😅

Hmm. Idk. I was leaning towards the depression community but it's also (hopefully) motivational too. And it does go with the Dopamine topic too. Because low dopamine causes depression too. Decisions, decisions 🤔

Tbh I pretend that I'm fine a lot. Sometimes I just ride it out and eventually it eases. I honestly don't know if it's ever fully gone away. Sometimes venting or talking can help. 
1 reply
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 16th

@mytwistedsoul

BTW, wherever you post, it is good. Things get so entangled, it's hard to determine any one genre. So, I say... anything in the right direction is a good choice,

I did read your post on Dopamine thread and will come back to it... the whole gratification and thankfulnress is a good dopamine consideration too. 

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User Profile: cheerfulKiwi1776
cheerfulKiwi1776 April 16th

@IsayUncle

Hey man. If you ever want to vent but have nobody to just send me a text. I dont really mind okay? Even if you just want a small talk or something

2 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 17th

@cheerfulKiwi1776

Hi image_1776420319.png.

Thank you CheerfulKiwi. That is very kind and thoughtful. BTW, I really like your username I can't get the picture of a smiling Kiwi running around. Thanks for the uplift. I hope you have a beautiful day. 😃

1 reply
User Profile: cheerfulKiwi1776
cheerfulKiwi1776 April 17th

@IsayUncle

Thank you about my name haha.  Feel free to text!

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User Profile: BlueDarkAurora
BlueDarkAurora April 15th

cute-kawaii.gif

2 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 15th

@BlueDarkAurora


sending-love-sending-love-to-you.gif

1 reply
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 15th

@mytwistedsoul @BlueDarkAurora

Ditto... Me Too. 😁💖

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User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 20th

@mytwistedsoul

Hi Twist, I POSTED THIS HERE AND ON THE BRINK THREAD.... I DID IT HERE ALSO BECAUSE IT IS AN ONGOING WORK IN PROCESS.

My mind grinding several different perspectives and points of views. Starting these two threads really gets the mind going.

Everything is so interconnected, and one thing and then it connects to another thing and etc. I think posting In the depression forum was a good idea. You probably could have put the dopamine over there too, because everything is so connected.

I’m writing to you here because if I write in the post I think it will be too long, and too confusing so I thought I would share all these ideas with you and even though everything is interconnected, I’m talking about the brink of depression mostly.

Talking about the brink of depression, Leads me to one cause and that is being overwhelmed. The following punch list is of all the things that are running through my mind used to be an indicator of getting overwhelmed. (Now I let them drift…. A good reflection of growth)

Writing here in the scratch pad Will help me unload the garbage, while at the same time preserving the important stuff. (I DECIDED TO POST HERE INSTEAD).... It's a reflection or reminder how easy it is to get overwhelmed, and pushed to the brink of depression.

CHAOTIC BRAIN DUMP

Dopamine threads into everything.

Gratitude and thankfulness.

Starting and finishing.

Importance of written routines, journals, and to do’s.

Added worries, problems out of nowhere.

Reflections. Forgetting the good, remembering the bad.

Beyond existing.

How all the entanglements weave together and interconnect.

(NOTE: This is a partial list) I think this is why a routine list, journal and/or to-do list is beneficial to help us away from the brink a little bit. It helps to sort and prioritize daily.

monday-happy-monday.gif

4 replies
User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 20th

@IsayUncle Everything is interconnected that's for sure. And yes overwhelm is always at the top of my things. So much to do and not enough hours in the day to them. There's things I have to do, things I need to do and things I want to do. And yes there's always those problems out of no where. I have things that I do routinely and I'm a big fan of to do lists. I try to remember to make reminders for things. 


I have to admit I haven't dumped anything brain wise in a long time. I tend to tuck things away for later but later never seems to happen
monday-hello-monday.gif
3 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 23rd

@mytwistedsoul

7 CUPS with Twist.

Topic: Core Balance 4/23/26

What do I mean by “Core Balance Chores”? When I coined this phrase, I did look it up on the Internet to see if there is anything similar to the phrase or concept. I believe I just said core balance, and the only thing that came up was physical exercise for the core of your body your stomach, abdomen area. It was like core exercises.

Looking up Core Balance Chores, like you did, does come up with the child “chores and balance” process and training for children. So, I haven’t really found anything on the Internet that addresses my concept.

When I tried to explain it to somebody else on 7 cups previously, they looked at my list and they simply stated that it just looks like A to-do list, which they are not wrong at all. It appears to be a basic to-do list. But a core balanced list is so much more than a mere to-do list.

A person’s Core Balance Chores, is a very personal list of things that is important to them. For one person it can be 1000 things, but for another person, it can be one thing, and for someone else it can be several things. For me it turned out to be several things.

So, the chores themselves are relative to the persons Circumstances. The actual chores are not the important part. The important part is finding your core balance In regards to self-care and daily obligations. It’s about deciding what is the bare minimum that you want to live the rest of your life like, the bare minimum. Only the individual can decide, in an honest perspective What’s their bare minimums Are going to be.

We are talking about being in a depression so deep, that you cannot get out of bed for days, It’s a chore to cook, There’s no point in doing nothing or doing anything. But logic and common sense tells you that you have to do something.

You don’t want to live like this anymore And so you decide that you are going to wake up every day and get cleaned up. Maybe one day you have the energy to do it, and maybe the next day you do not have the energy to do it. But you know in your heart of heart, that you need to do it every day. If you are going to find a balance in your life away from deep depression, you do understand that this is something you’re going to have to do every day for the rest of your life.

This would be considered a Core Balance Chore

What ends up happening, is that you start doing this every day and before you know it, after you get yourself cleaned up you may decide to vacuum the floor wash a dish or even have something to eat. And so in some small way you start to feel better about yourself on a daily basis.

But then the gloom and doom come back and you find yourself wallowing in bed, in a deep depression and you can’t find no way out. This is when you remember your Core Balance Chore. You remember that it felt good, you remember that it helped you feel a little more balanced and so you start doing it again.

Right now is April of 2026 and I started seven Cups in 2021. I suffered a deep depression and like a lot of people I was just trying to survive. For me and over time I realized I wanted to live in a certain manner. I wanted my house they have some sense of cleanliness in order. I wanted my personal body to be clean. And it was as simple as that. But it was not simple to do. It was extremely hard. I made to do lists, play lots of games with myself trying to convince myself to do things throughout the day, but no matter what I did, it was not easy to do the chores that I needed to do to make myself feel good.

The simple choice that had to do, for a lot of people or just normal everyday things that don’t even hardly take any time. But for me in my deep depression, They were like moving mountains. But I kept at it, one at a time, even if it took me a week to go through the process. Eventually I started to get better at it.

5 years later, I have morphed My core balance chores into My anti depression schedule.

When everything falls apart, and everything starts to overwhelm me, as I see myself slipping into the brink of a deep depression, I know I will only fall as far back as my Core Balance Chores. I will focus on my core balance chores until I Regulate my balance and then start growing from there again.

image_1776934527.png         image_1776934596.png

I have advanced beyond my core balanced chores, to the point where I have morphed them into daily schedule and they are no longer my one and only thing I can do. But they are things that need to be done every day to help me maintain my core balance.

And Justice a side note, cleaning the kitchen at one time was a BIG part of my core balance chores. But when I was strong enough to advance into an anti-depression schedule, I recategorized it.

A good strong start for the day, Helps keep the depression away and hence, my anti depression schedule. Please note that it doesn’t have anything to do about the tasks for the day or going to work and other obligations.

2 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 23rd

@IsayUncle

Twist, I forgot to point out a significant observation: Where lack of dopamine, intersected with my core balance chores. We just discovered the idea of the lack of dopamine So back when I was doing my Core balance chores, which started off as, just trying to make it through the day, I was blaming myself for my inability to function.

I/we Have learned, because we have no predopamine, we have to function like a robot to get chores done because we have no dopamine motivation. (Remember, the more we do this, The more we are rebuilding our predopamine engines). But until then, Sadly it's a robotic action just for the need of completion.

In reflection , I realize, that's what I've been doing for the past few years with my core balance chores. I think this is a good observation. 

I just wanted to point out how the dopamine topic Was intertwined into my struggle without me even being aware of it. I'd also like to point out,

(off topic, but noteworthy) The importance of not quitting and keep pushing forward even if we don't understand the struggle, at the moment. 

User Profile: mytwistedsoul
mytwistedsoul April 24th

@IsayUncle I noticed You spend the first couple hours focused on doing things for you. Drinking water and doing stretches. You're starting the day gently and getting small wins in, rather than jumping right into work or obligations. That's pretty smart! 

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User Profile: trueconfidant123
trueconfidant123 April 21st

@IsayUncle

thank-you.gif

2 replies
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP April 23rd

@trueconfidant123

Thank You, ((((HUGS)))) 🥰

1 reply
User Profile: trueconfidant123
trueconfidant123 April 23rd

@IsayUncle

*hugs* 🫂 

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User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP May 1st

@mytwistedsoul

Hi Twist. 

I wanted to ask you a personal question, and the scratch pad is less public so I thought maybe this would be a better place to do it.

We were talking about our childhood and we we had two different childhoods but somehow converged into the same dynamic.

I believe earlier you stated on some level, that you're not a social person. I was wondering if that meant you felt like you were socially dysfunctional or if you just don't like people?

If you're socially dysfunctional I'm curious to How that affects you and the Things that you do. (Only if you want to share).

I mentioned in the dopamine thread, that my upbringing led me into a Narcissistic personality. I never knew that word, growing up Or gave it any consideration. But of course with this new age of this computer and everybody self analyzing themselves, that word gets thrown around like piece of candy.

I guess back in the day I would have been called a Mister know it all, or someone that was full of himself. Same thing, different words.

One of the reasons I bring this up, is because it's really weird how everyone thinks you're full of yourself and that you're a Mr Know It All when in reality, You don't feel like you're worth nothing and all you're trying to do is prove to other people that you know something. 

The only good thing about the whole situation is after spending a lifetime of trying to do everything right, I actually did learn a few things that some people don't know. But now I have the wisdom to try not to share it with them..... key word..... TRY. Sadly, it's part of my dna now.

I felt like the unwanted baby of 7 kids, And you are a single child that also felt unwanted. I was wondering how this affects your social interaction. I was wondering if it was similar to mine or perhaps different.

And of course, Only if you want to share. 

P.S. For me, anything i share here can be brought up in any thread we author, if it helps explaining and understanding for others easier.

2 replies

@IsayUncle It's probably a little of both? Sometimes I can tolerate people better and other times they overwhelm me. I can do small talk with the checkout people at a store 😅 But people make me anxious because I'm always sure I'm going to say the wrong thing to upset someone. I'm the guy that's in the corner out of the way, and hanging out with the dog 😅


I knew I wasn't wanted growing up, I was told more often than I can count. Which I guess is kind of nice because it took out the guess work. My parents believed children shouldn't be seen or heard, so I spent a lot of time alone. I wasn't allowed to have friends. Now, as an adult, I keep to myself. I don't have any friends. I'm hyper independent and self reliant. I'm either too much or not enough

I don't know how to regulate emotions so they get shutdown altogether. I struggle with trust, people pleasing, and attachments. I can connect to people but I struggle to maintain those connections. Probably because if I'm struggling with something I isolate. 

I don't try to prove anything that I know or think I might know because I was always told I was stupid or too dumb to do anything. Kind of feel like I shared too much here 😅 TMI 😬

I have to tell you Uncle, I know we only know each other online but I don't see a narcissistic personality with you. Was this diagnosed? (if you're comfortable sharing) 
1 reply
User Profile: IsayUncle
IsayUncle OP May 5th

@mytwistedsoul

Hey, Not TMI at all. 🤗. It's rough being negated so completely. You seem much stronger now Thanks for sharing, and I hope being aware of it helps you navigate it to your advantage, more and more as time goes on. I also connect well but then lose the connection... ??... Trust... yep, not there. 😕 

Thank you, And i was not diagnosed. And perhaps a true narcissist would not see or try to correct it. But those traits have definitely destroyed my social interactions with strangers and family alike. Perhaps it's not as obvious now, because I'm very conscious of it, and like others, 7 cups gives me time to think about what I'm going to say and etc. But I'm glad I'm figuring it out. It's good to talk to people about it though.

I think the self reliance Is the one amazingly good things about the isolation. I know for me, I don't blame others for my inadequacies. I will be glad when I can relax, and enjoy the day. That will come with financial security which I think I'm getting closer to. 🤑😁

(off topic from other thread.... Wooo Whooo, getting lumber to the saw mill!) Good job staying busy! 😀

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