Apathetic
I’m honestly just writing out my feelings right now. Apologies if any of it is incoherent at all.
I just feel like giving up. I go to work full time, feel as if nobody, not even the people I like there, can ever actually get to know me at all, go home to a family of people I also feel can never get to actually know me at all, and occasionally hang out with a group of friends I just can’t seem to emotionally connect with anymore.
Everyday feels the same. Work is just countless interactions with customers upset about this or that, or coworkers upset with me over this or that. Nonstop. And days off are just for sleep and maybe chores or errands. Anything else takes so energy to do that I just…don’t have anymore.
Every interaction I have, whether it be with someone in my personal life or a stranger, feels meaningless to me. Everything I do feels meaningless.
I don’t feel like I’m gonna do anything drastic or anything. I just feel…so apathetic. Like nothing matters, and caring about anything at all is just gonna end in me being upset anyway.
@ConureConnor
You are NOT alone IMO most people feel this way. I try to not take personally, as at work those "friends" are often temporary as once a person is not working with another they may not have enough in common to continue work was the bond.
FAMILY most made their impression of you at a certain point of time and do not see the real us or changes we go thru. We may feel why bother and do the bare minimum outside of work etc. It is so backwards but I break out of that funk ......by forcing myself do something different ...trying new things meeting new people if possible. Starting is the hardest, but once you do a few things you will think it was not that bad. I introduced myself to a new neighbor and take a 20 minute walk with them few times a week not that they will be my best friend but it was a step ... met others thru them etc. At work I am happy when a project goes well or i can solve a persons problem even if the rest of them are complainers one or 2 real "thanks" is what I take as good.
Are you… me?
@ConcureConnor
As said you are not alone.
I resonate with everything you have said. For me knowing that retirement is on the horizon, work has become so mudaine that I just dislike being there.
I don't interact with many at all because I feel like I typically never fit in.
I hope things for you start to look up 🤗💖