I feel envy
I wasn't like this, I had life purpose. But I recently realized I seek validation from other people. I guess everyone does but I feel envy and feel lonely at my struggles. I used to seek help from a teacher but recently saw he values status more than meaningful work. I feel bad to not have his validation. I feel bad I don't have people around me to share the same values. I know they are there, I have to wait for a bit but the loneliness is getting too heavy. That's why talking about it to feel a bit lighter.
@seashell145
Most all people want or seek validation from others......
sounds like you found out early on that Sometimes all through life you will find this ....... where i work i get results and yet people like your teacher values status or style over substance ....
the work thing was giving validation with big talker who has no follow thru so i stepped back watched her fail BIG ........ i have my own validation watching that. You need to recognize your own worth and when you speak up to others you will find those out there who share your values.
@toughTiger6481
I'm sorry you went through that. I hope things get easier for me so I won't feel this much envy anymore. Yes, I agree that after a while we could see that status isn't sustainable.
@seashell145
Hi seashell,
what you are talking about is highly relatable to must people out here. As human beings we are wired to seek validation from others. Evolutionary speaking, this was extremely important for integrating in the group and survival. Therefore it is no surprise that this is such a big theme of our lives and an never-ending issue.
I think merely asking yourself "who exactly do I want validation from? Who do I want to impress? Why this person? Why is that important to me?" is powerful in itself. Finding the reasons behind why we do what we do and being aware of them is a step towards healing. From that point on we can work on addressing the "root problem". I find that seeking constant validation is just a symptom of a much deeper issue.
I hope that this provides some clarity and I wish you all the best, sending you lots of hugs and support ❤️