I feel lost

Hiiii how's everyone doing?

I'm at a lost for words, I don't even know if this counts as a thread, some things will just be blurted out because my vessel is full.

My body feels numb. My tummy is turning. Not sure if I'm coming or going. There's a lump in my throat. My heart is pounding. My head is spinning And tears are just pouring. I'm not sure what I'm feeling but it's not comfortable. I'm mentally and emotionally drained. Trying to get into a calm space before my kids get home. Just for today, I'd like to be whole for them. But I cannot even smile.

So I lay apon my bed suffocated by My thoughts, to be honest I don't even know what I'm thinking. Looking for the courage to get up and tackle this day.

But everything has left my body, only my soul remains

And she too, is tired

She wishes to scream but no sound dares to leave.

She wants to speak out but her tongue won't come operate.

She's the only one that wants goodness for me but the rest of my limbs have betrayed me and turned on her

Blank blank blank

I have no idea what I'm doing or what I'm expecting from this post, but thanks