Is the other shoe finally dropping?
I’m so Severely empty inside. Every where. My heart. In my body. My soul. Spirit. Only my mind repeatedly creates more and more split thoughts. Incessantly. No reprieve. I build myself up. Break. Build it again with thoughts it’ll be different. Then I break again. So much so now. The up and downs. Have left me fractured. Shattered. I’ve got two medically fragile babies to care for. But feel I have nothing left. To give. To fight.
@blueHouse663
You are a beautiful mother and I have no doubt that you love your children 💛
It's important you ask for help and you also focus on yourself and see that you matter also.
💛
@blueHouse663
My dear Bluehouse, I am so sorry you have to go through this. We are here to support and listen (read) whenever you need. I am quite certain of one thing, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. It is especially difficult to remember this when you are struggling, when you are in turmoil.
Don't give up, I have something that may be of some help, it is a little thing I do to manage, and cope with, my conditions.
Everyone has strengths, positive traits, inner abilities that they can use to resolve issues but in the chaos and confusion of what many therapists would refer to as "waterfall thinking" it is more
often than not so easy to lose sight of, and faith in, themselves.
The first thing that might be done is if each were to look deep within and try to identify their strengths, traits and abilities.
I undertake a form of "meditation", if you like.
I simply sat, in a quiet room, that was comfortable in climate. I sat on a comfortable seat and I made a conscious effort to relax my body,
my physical shell. When I had relaxed the physical I went into my mind, I imagined actually looking into my mind as though it were a storeroom (which, in essence, is what the brain is) I "accepted" that I had been
labeled by the doctors and acknowledged that it was part of me now. I "walked" past it and went further in. I imagined my way back to a time before I was diagnosed, labeled, before I became the "now" me.
I saw, in my mind, the me I had been and I watched the "past" me. I watched the events I had experienced and watched how I had reacted, dealt with and succeeded at things. I saw my "courage", my "strength",
my "intelligence" at work, my "kindness", my "compassion" and my "sense of humour".
I saw what was STILL in me but buried.
It wasn't all said and done in one go. I had to keep doing it a number of times before it finally became clear but when it did the sense of empowerment and relief were overwhelming. I realised I could cope
with anything.
I hope something here is of some help to you.
Namaste,
Wolf
(Listener - 7 Cups of Tea)
