Lost all my confidence
My parents don't believe in me anymore they said I'll never amount to anything. They made me join med school against my wishes and now blame me for being not great in it. They're once again forcing me to give up on my dream branch for postgraduation and take the branch they feel is right and the college they feel is right. If i try to stand up for myself they start crying about how I've given them so much stress and later on I'm ridden with guilt. I'm starting to believe maybe they're right about that i will not be able to achieve anything. How will I ? No one is ever successful in the work they do half heartedly. It scares me that that if today I agree to their decision they will take more decisions for me later in the future, including who I marry, where I stay and where I work. I have lost hopes for myself today
@limegreenHuman9402
you are correct and parents may mean well in telling you what they think you should do but if you are doing things, you do not want to do you will not be good at it and will be mad at yourself and them for putting you in this situation.
Exactly but it's so hard to explain this to them!
@limegreenHuman9402
I agree when difficult to talk find common ground....
maybe their parents directed them, and they did not do what they wanted but just accepted what they got.... in this case ask they what they wanted to do.
Or on the other hand I have seen people hoping to save their child from the trial and error they went thru and think choosing a safe path saves you a struggle. ... in this case it is hard to get parents to let us fail on our own...too but being honest and talking about it is better.
I understand that, as parents they will always be worried about me and want the best for me. But what hurts me the most is them being able to tell me frankly that i will not amount to anything just because I'm not listening to them. In that case it's hard for me to find a common ground
Ps: thanks for replying to my post<3
@limegreenHuman9402
This is a difficult situation. Do your parents think medicine is the only path to success?
What interests you? Are you interested in some other technical field, like chemistry, or do you want to do something completely different, like art?
Also, if you don't mind my asking, are you from a culture where making decisions independently of your parents is seen as disrespectful and shameful?
I wouldn't say making decisions is disrespectful but going against what they have decided can make them feel hurt.
I don't even remember what I liked to be honest. I've invested so much time and energy in med school that it has now become a part of me. I just want to be able to do postgraduation in a branch that i have started to like in med school, it's still clinical, I'll still be a doctor.
Also the amount of money that has been spent will go to waste if I completely change my career pathway and i don't plan on doing that.
I wish they understood that I'm not disrespecting them. I'm only going against them because I'm the one who will have to work for life in that branch not them.
@limegreenHuman9402
You have an MD, and your parents are telling you that you won't amount to anything? You have already completed a major accomplishment! Why are they so concerned about your specialty?
See listen when u get a good job or when you'll start earning life automatically shifts I mean ur parents nature of treating u will change, and yes at the beginnings there are most of the parents who don't feel they're child gonna do good they themselves try to take his or her desicion only in order to protect the future consequences, but sometimes they don't understand the science of letting child to have freedom to do what he loves, in such cases u don't have to fight, cause it might will worse the situation, u just do what you are doing now, try to just get a degree and pass out then decide by urself what u have to do, u can follow ur dream by doing job too if really wanted to do that thing, u can also try to wash ur parents brain by diverting them, like u hVe knowledge about field n post no. Of seats it have and the toughness of exam n where u lie , u can demonstrate to them this thing indont stand there it will be just waste of time , energy n money, and even if they don't listen u just do the postgraduate and side by side try to follow ur dream, sometimes in life not everything is in our control and that's okay.
@limegreenHuman9402i am so sorry
I’m sending you a long