Making a Bad Thing Worse
This is a long time needed confession.
The short of it? I’ve been catfishing a woman for well over a year and earlier this week she told me she has aggressive cancer.
My guilt over it all had me contemplating coming clean or ending things way before this, but fear of hurting her kept me from it. Ultimately, I just hoped we’d lose interest and it would end.
I’m not looking for sympathy, I don’t deserve it.
Now what? Do I tell her the truth and hurt her while she’s already dealing with something awful? I obviously can’t go see her when I’m lying like this, but I don’t want her to think that I don’t care.
Waiting until the end just doesn’t feel right.
@courteousOrange6472 ok I just looked up what catfishing means, and damn! That's a hard spot you've put yourself in🙁 I don't know if there's a wrong or right answer here, I think you need to do what's best for her in this situation, whatever you think that is. Also you need to find peace of mind on this whole situation or it will haunt you forever😕 is there perhaps a friend of family member of hers you can tell the truth to? Maybe with directions from them you can both get some closure and work out what to do for the better. Good luck sweetie 💖
I really appreciate the response. ❤️
Agreed. This is a really shameful thing I’ve done.
I know I need to do what’s best for her. No doubt about it. I just wish I knew for sure what that was. Unfortunately I don’t have contact with her family.
Thank you so much again for the reassurance.
I really appreciate the response. ❤️
Agreed. This is a really shameful thing I’ve done.
I know I need to do what’s best for her. No doubt about it. I just wish I knew for sure what that was. Unfortunately I don’t have contact with her family.
Thank you so much again for the reassurance.
@courteousOrange6472 good luck with everything sweetie 💖 please know that whatever you decide to do will be the right thing to do 💖 we are all here for you 💗
I appreciate the post. That’s where my head was at as well.
@courteousOrange6472
i agree. But, I’d also like to add—forgive yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be brave. And also, she may still want you around ❤️ hugs to you
Thanks for this. I really do appreciate it. ❤️
@courteousOrange6472 This is a real tough one. Im sure you had your reasons for this 'catfishing' situation and I can only hope that you have learnt from this experience. It must a very difficult situation to face and like motioned in previous responses I hope you learn to forgive yourself and move on and make better decisions going forward. Sending strength
Why not just doing the right thing and be the person she think you are?
"because i'm not" you might say?
Well, what worse? Pretending to be someone you're not for someone's sake and from now on genuinely clearing up until the end or falling into your own drama because you did something wrong?
In my opinion (as a man starved for attention and connection relevance to thw world) you should man up and stick with her. Don't overdo yourself, don't exagerate... just... be a buddy, maybe make her smile from time to time... you know... are these little things that truhly matter.
What you did until now it's not erasable, but maybe you can be better from now on.