Subtle emotional hurt
It's been so long with many ups and downs. I'm good, but them I'm hurting. I don't know where to start but I hv this underlying guilt abt stuff like somewhere in my brain there's such a misalignment of circumstances and the person I am there's a belief that I'm the worst and the worst things are happening to me maybe bcoz I wanna prove i can be loved even tho I'm the worst or something like that? But lately it's been changing. I feel like I'm making so much progress whether it's not spiraling ,not getting jealous of my ex anymore or understanding myself better. But even thru all this I'm so so tired *** I'm like why just why is there this subtle emotional pain always thru everything and I've been thru enough I'm do tired I've suffered long enough and even tho I'm making better decisions my emotions aren't getting better they seem stuck like some dull ache in my body abd god I'm so tired snd I tell my therapist a lot but sometimes I doubt she's the right one for me. Sometimes I leave the sessions feeling more confused and heavy than clear. And then I feel guilt for some emotions but then I hv to remind myself that no, I deserve to live a good life no matter what my feelings are or who I am. But still It shcks and feels like a subtle never ending loop of darkness abd I'm suddenly so so restless!
@reservedVase8999
You are a good person.
You are worth being loved.
You can heal.
You do deserve to be free of your ex.
Keep building.
One day at a time 💚
Thank u so much for hearing me out and those kind words. It is so sweet. I just needed to vent. Hope ur doing well, and again thank u😄
@reservedVase8999
Hi Vase 😊!!
I’m really sorry you’re going through so much right now. I’m walking through a very similar phase too. Subtle emotions are never easy—even if they look quiet on the outside, they’re heavy in a silent way. Sometimes it’s not loud pain, but it sits deep, and you can’t even explain it properly. I see you, buddy. Truly. I know that place.
We often feel guilty for carrying these emotions, like we’re “too much” or making a big deal out of nothing. For me, a lot of it comes from loneliness—feeling like I don’t really belong anywhere anymore, like I can’t fully open up to anyone. Sometimes it feels like my true self is hidden, and I’m just pretending my way through life.
Maybe it could help to gently ask yourself what made you carry this silent chaos right now. Not in a blaming way—just with curiosity. What’s the root of it?
I relate so much to what you said, i used be okay when you’re busy, but everything falling apart when you’re alone and doing nothing. No matter how engaged I am during the day, the heaviness comes back the moment I sit quietly. The thoughts rush in, and it feels endless. When you said “a subtle never-ending loop of darkness”, that really hit. I think sometimes we’re not truly listening to ourselves or giving our souls the space they’re asking for.
And you know… subtle emotions aren’t always bad. As painful as they are, they often shape us, soften us, and help us understand ourselves more deeply over time. It doesn’t make it easier right now, but I do believe this phase is slowly building a stronger, wiser version of you.
So hey, Vase… you’re not alone in this chaos anymore. I’m here for you 🤍 I truly mean that.
Sending you lots of strength, peace, and the warmest hugs 🤗💐 You deserve a good life no matter what you feel. 🦋
Hey there. I'm so sorry ur going thru this too. Ur right about them being a quiet pain and not being able to explain. And yes it does at times feel like we r hurting over nothing bcoz it's hard to pinpoint why. I understand about the not being able to open up part. It feels like not being able to share what matters and it can really hurt. I believe in u and know ull learn to give ur emotions the space they need soon. And it does make sense that they help shape us. Sometimes it's truly hard to believe bcoz it feels as tho after so much healing we r getting nowhere. But still I'll try holding onto that. Thank u so much for ur kind, warm words. Ik ur going thru a lot too, so hang in there❤️
