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The Burden of Expectations

User Profile: themerlin
themerlin October 13th, 2025

— Walls of Hope and Suffocation**

Expectations are the invisible architects of our inner prisons. They rise like towering walls, built brick by brick from the dreams of others and the hopes we impose on ourselves. What begins as aspiration soon becomes a suffocating weight—promises of success, love, perfection that choke the breath from our spirits. I have carried this burden until my shoulders bowed, until hope itself turned to despair, trapping me between the illusion of potential and the reality of my fractured self.

Society scripts our roles with relentless precision: the dutiful child, the ambitious professional, the unflinching provider. Parents' eyes gleam with visions of glory we never chose; friends measure our worth by milestones unmet; we, in turn, chase shadows of approval, equating value with achievement. Each unmet expectation carves a deeper wound—failure whispered as inadequacy, success fleeting and hollow. The walls close in: hope dangles like a distant light, but the air grows thin, heavy with judgment's echo. "You should be more," they say, and we believe it, building higher barriers to hide our stumbling humanity.

I recall the nights when ambition's fire burned brightest, fueling all-nighters and sacrificed joys, only to awaken to suffocation. The promotion that demanded my soul, the relationship molded to fit ideals rather than truth, the self-image polished to perfection's cruel standard—these were the chains disguised as ladders. Hope promised liberation: "Just one more step, one more win." But each climb led deeper into isolation, walls of expectation blocking the raw, messy beauty of simply being. We suffocate not from lack, but from the pressure to embody ideals that were never ours.

Yet, these walls teach a harsh liberation. To dismantle them is to confront the lie: expectations are not destiny, but distortions we can refuse. Hope, unburdened, becomes a gentle guide rather than a tyrant—accepting flaws, celebrating small truths over grand facades. Tear down the barriers: forgive the world its projections, release yourself from self-imposed cages. In the rubble lies freedom—the space to breathe, to falter, to rise on your own terms.

Reader, feel the weight you carry. Those walls of hope and suffocation are universal, but so is the power to breach them. Step back, question the blueprints. True light filters through cracks of authenticity, not perfection. Let go, and watch the prison crumble into open sky.

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User Profile: SkillfullMeans
SkillfullMeans October 13th, 2025

@themerlin

This is so beautiful! 

1 reply
User Profile: themerlin
themerlin OP October 13th, 2025

What kind of experience you had

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User Profile: crimsonRaspberries1486
crimsonRaspberries1486 October 13th, 2025

This was beautifully written thank you so much for the lovely gentle poetic reminder of what we envisioned for ourselves what are standards are for ourselves. How lovely and impactful thank you very much, I think I have to sit down with myself and really question some things.

7 replies
User Profile: themerlin
themerlin OP October 14th, 2025

Your review meant world for me I am really thankful for your time and feed also your reply is proof of that I am not saying something only true to myself

User Profile: themerlin
themerlin OP October 14th, 2025

@crimsonRaspberries1486 That means a lot to me. The moment you sit with yourself honestly, the walls already begin to fall. Questioning is the first act of freedom. 🌙

5 replies
User Profile: crimsonRaspberries1486
crimsonRaspberries1486 October 14th, 2025

I've entered a new chapter in my healing I've come long way so honestly I really needed to see this post thank you very kindly again. I hope you are having a lovely day 💓

What would you say is the most impactful way to sit down with yourself, is it just something that each person goes through on their own in their own way just like everyone's healing journey? 🙂

4 replies
User Profile: themerlin
themerlin OP October 15th, 2025

@crimsonRaspberries1486 That’s such a profound question. 🌙

To sit with yourself is not about techniques — it’s about permission.
Permission to stop performing, to stop fixing, and to simply witness what rises. Some people find it through journaling, some through silence, some through long walks where thoughts untangle on their own.

For me, it begins with honesty — sitting without distraction and asking, “What am I avoiding right now?” The answer usually opens a doorway. Healing doesn’t demand effort; it asks for presence.
And presence, once allowed, does the rest. 🌿
3 replies
User Profile: crimsonRaspberries1486
crimsonRaspberries1486 October 15th, 2025

I am learning through journaling, I am discovering so much with myself and soul, I believe I am heading down the right bath with what you speak of. Like any journey we go on, it's ever the same it can be similar but never the same. I've been having hard conversations, difficult things I didn't give myself permission to talk about for a while.

It seems it takes a different level of strength to sit down face to face with yourself and speak. I guess one way I've done this is through my daydreaming, and journaling. When I daydream I go elsewhere, away from earth, I tend to sometimes sit down and speak my own mind, the screams, the crying, the emotions I keep away from others I love I release them when I daydream.

It's not that the people I love aren't there for me and loyal, it's more of I don't want them to see me in that emotional state. It hurts them badly to see me clutching myself and screeching while I talk to myself. It's a healing I don't like but it's healthy, raw, beautiful, and it helps me grow more.🌱

When I journal it's the same kind of loving pain, but I tend to somewhat hold back some, there is something about daydreaming that hits differently. Words are lovely words have power, how I chose to use them impacts the conversation I have with myself, I'm starting to ramble.😅 I'm not sure if I'm making any sense, if you can understand the place I go to.. if anyone can understand it on here..

2 replies
User Profile: themerlin
themerlin OP October 15th, 2025

@crimsonRaspberries1486 Your words left me still for a while — that kind of honesty doesn’t just speak, it echoes. 🌙

The place you describe — where pain and daydream meet — I understand it completely. It’s that quiet corner of the soul where we can finally let the truth scream without fear of breaking anything around us.
You’re not rambling; you’re revealing. And that takes courage most people spend lifetimes avoiding.

Daydreaming, journaling — they’re both bridges, aren’t they? One takes us beyond the world, the other brings us gently back. What matters is that you’re walking between them with awareness, letting the emotions move instead of letting them rot. That’s growth — raw, unpolished, real.

Thank you for trusting me with that piece of you. The way you write tells me your healing isn’t just happening — it’s teaching. 🌿
1 reply
User Profile: crimsonRaspberries1486
crimsonRaspberries1486 October 15th, 2025

Thank you for letting me speak, it's too often I let these truths out to people. My circle is extremely tight. I am working on trusting people again and people like you and others on this platform let me see the prove that I can trust. Sometimes when you talk to someone you yourself have to set the right mood to do so.

To be open and honest with not only you but myself takes music, music too contains so much power even if it's just instrumental it can too take you to another world and else where if you let it. I bounce between earth and else where, like what you said "they are both bridges one takes us behind this world and the other brings us gently back" I've done this time and time before, it moves me each and every time. 💜

I used to go there to escape the twisted agony of the hardships of this lifetime, I stopped going to escape I go there to regain myself again, regain my powers and dive deep into myself to find me. To find the warrior to conquer my battles, pick up my heart and soul, and rebuild what was rightfully mine. My pasts do not define how strong I am or what I am capable of doing, God had placed me down here to speak my voice to help others, to spread all my endless love onto others unbroken or broken.

I've redeemed so much of myself back and I still have a whole life to continue to break chains, build, break, love, fight, fight for what's right. I am not damaged I'm a messy human who's trying her best to live my life as much as I can through my pain. That's all I know how to do, to keep going through despite all the pain, to push and see the light at the end of the tunnel. 🕯️

I am honored to life the life I do, to have struggled, to be in agony, all these strong heavy, raw painful experiences is what makes me me. How I go through it, how I help others while taking care of myself. ❤️‍🔥 There's that fire burning in me endlessly never giving out, to fight like h*ll.

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User Profile: AdvocateHP
AdvocateHP October 14th, 2025

This is wonderfully written, thank you for sharing this post here! Indeed, there is a beauty in simplicity and a strength in staying true to oneself. May you always be what you are: the best you I know 😊

User Profile: fossilfellow
fossilfellow October 14th, 2025

@themerlin Thank you for sharing this 🥰 You're awesome <3 , and you truly matter ❤️ Sending lots of love your way 🐾💕