Weekly Prompt #20: Do you have any guilt? How did it make you feel?
Hello everyone, I hope everyone is having a good week.
A couple of weeks ago we discussed- How does self-esteem impact your daily life? If you haven't checked yet, please click here to add your thoughts.
This week's prompt is: Do you have any guilt? How did it make you feel?
Take a moment to reflect on your guilts and how they made you feel. Remember, managing your emotions is an ongoing journey, and it's okay to seek support and guidance along the way. Please share and discuss here among us.
Join us in the 24/7 General Support Group Chat to share and support each other.
@ASilentObserver Oh yes, thank you. I started long ago by seeking another view on my past mistakes. To have someone else, fresh and different view helped me a lot, while I learned how to recall my emotions and being able to objectively look at my past at the same time. However my actions in the past messed up my future (which is now my present) so I am spending a good amount of time fixing that damage done to both me and my surroundings right now. I found myself in a dark place back then because of the things I have done, leading to depression among other things. To fight these things was my first step and I found out a lot of my worries and problems DO have a beginning in the past. So, my first goal is to take a good care of myself (which I am doing, step by step ! :) ) then, once I am confident and both physically and mentally healthy and strong - take care of my surroundings as well. Fixing and healing myself like I would build a house - brick by brick, the walls rise. And talking about understanding and support, this very site with lovely people provides me both ! 🥰
@Votre Thank you for adding more thoughts, Votre. It sounds like you've come a long way in your healing process through self-reflection and seeking understanding from others. Reflecting on past experiences can be challenging yet helpful for growth. Focusing on self-care and healing step-by-step is admirable. What aspects of opening up to support have you found most impactful in your journey so far? You clearly have a caring approach to yourself and your surroundings. You also mentioned the support here has been valuable. We are glad to have you here with us. We are all here to support you <3
@ASilentObserver Oh yes, thank you again for such a warming words ! 🥰 Generally and also for me personally, I believe that one of the biggest, most impactful aspect of opening up to someone is the feeling of relief. To finally let go of your thoughts, emotions and worries, calming yourself down this way - to take a breath before jumping into a water metaphorically, where that water is your life with its positives and mainly negatives that need your attention and strenght to deal with.
As I said and you noticed, self-reflection is a great "tool" for me and could be for many people, I believe. However, it is not always easy, especially not at first to self-reflect, to see things on yourself as easy as you can see them on others. That is when support shines - giving you reflection and views you do not see yourself, while also teaching you about and to see those views by yourself.
Yes, support here is always helpful and valuable. This way I can continue on my journey while also have a chance to help others on theirs, making progress together 🤗
@Votre Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the value of opening up and reflecting with support. Self-reflection can be challenging at times but also important for growth. I'm glad to hear that support allows you to help others as you progress together.
Yup.
Given my medical history, and given my family’s medical history, it was cruel of me to have a kid. Kid spent their whole first year in and out of ERs and off and on steroids for the bad lungs I passed on, then came the autism diagnosis (I’ve got at least two relatives on the spectrum, one of whom is nonverbal), and there’s a very good chance this kid is going to end up with either grandpa’s bad eyes or grandma’s hearing loss (or both).
I can and do advocate for this kid whenever I can, and I do whatever I can to provide the best quality of life that I can, but deciding that my garbage genes deserved to be passed on was the lost selfish and cruel thing I could have done.
@generousSailboat3674 I am sorry to hear that Sail. It sounds like you're experiencing a lot of difficult emotions after making such an important life decision. Caring for a child is such a huge responsibility, and you want the very best for them. You clearly want the very best for your child. While the medical factors may have felt out of your control, your advocacy and care for your child's well-being shine through.
Please know we are all here with you to listen to and to suppoort. You are not alone in this. <3
@ASilentObserver
i feel guilty because my relationship is sinful in my religion, and both my religion and partner are important to me :(
@plumFan7226 It sounds like you're facing a difficult situation where both your relationship and religion hold deep importance for you. You must care greatly for both parts of your life to feel such inner conflict. How does this situation make you feel inside? Please know you are not alone in this. Feel free to share more as you feel comfortable <3
I feel guilty sometimes because my agoraphobia prevents me from fully supporting my father in his illness.
@DennisFinch It's understandable that feelings of guilt arise when you care deeply for your father but are unable to support him as you'd like due to your agoraphobia. You're still there for him in the ways you can be, and that says a lot about your love and compassion. What helps you cope with those difficult emotions during his illness?
We are all here for you. Dennis. We will get through and navigate these challenges together.
@ASilentObserver. Thank you for the warm comment. What helps me the most is to concentrate on the present moment. That way, I feel I have more energy and I'm more able to think about what I can do and must do, instead of thinking about what I should have done or cannot do.
@DennisFinch Hi Dennis, thank you for sharing how focusing on the present moment helps give you energy and the ability to think about what you can do. You seem determined to make the most of each day.
@ASilentObserver This week I've had a lot of guilt. From people getting mad at me at work (got behind in reports because of IT problems. But because I didn't let the leads know I was still having problems, it's my fault. Our manager put out an IT ticket on the 22nd & I was waiting for some sort of update. Then today I found some network reports have been down since the 22nd but that's my fault too), feeling bad from yelling at the puppy because she wasn't listening (& I haven't had much sleep for the past few weeks), feeling bad about my general lot in life (mainly because of the puppy. She needs a lot of exercise and she gets harder to deal with when she hasn't had enough but it's been so hot and humid lately that I don't want to take her out for long periods of time. I don't have a car so I either have to walk or take the bus), and feeling bad that I don't seem to be doing anything right especially at my job....
@Enthenia It sounds like you've had a difficult week dealing with many feelings of guilt. Having responsibilities at work and home while lacking support can really weigh on us. You mentioned lack of sleep also contributes - how have you coped with fatigue in the past? Please know we are all here with you to listen to and to support. Take your time to share more as you feel comfortable to. <3
@ASilentObserver well I usually do melatonin at night to help me sleep but that doesn't help ehen the puppy devides to bark at something or chew on something she shouldn't at midnight or one in the morning. I've been taking her to the courtyard behind me to let her run off the leash for about fifteen minutes. That seems to help and then I can sleep for another two or three hours before my alarm goes off.
This morning I found out that there are several people that are annoyed at work. I also found out that IT wasn't answering any tickets because a server crashed. Management knew about it. It would have been helpful to pass that information on to people who were having technical issues and then we could have let leads know. Yesterday I had to show a coworker a workaround to access the sites we haven't been able to access. Again, if management had that knowledge for a few days, wouldn't it be beneficial to pass that along to everyone and not just certain people?
I am just so tired of getting into trouble for everything when most of the time it's not my fault. But apparently there are many who feel similar to what I feel. Once I get all my classes completed, I will be job hunting again (although that's something I don't really like doing).
@Enthenia It sounds like you've had a difficult time with lack of sleep and frustration at work. Not feeling supported by management and constantly feeling blamed must be really draining. You mentioned taking your puppy outside has helped you rest more - focusing on small acts of self-care makes sense. <3
@ASilentObserver I feel guilt about being so angry at so much. A lot of what's happened in my life has been out of my control and it makes me angry that those things happened to me. I don't like being so angry, but its hard not to feel so much resentment towards the people who were supposed to take care of you and didn't.
@lovingApricot5145 It's understandable to feel anger about things that happened without your control as a child. Your feelings make sense as people are meant to protect the young. How has carrying this resentment affected you?
I was having an awful day! I shared multiple personal struggles with a staff member of a religious cult. They then proceeded to share that information with other members of staff. Soon after that, my life as I knew it began to collapse, due to my sharing personal, family struggles and issues with that church cult member. Up to that point in my life, I had kept my personal issues to myself. In my heart, I knew what I was doing was a bad decision, but did it anyway due to a crisis breaking point on that fateful day. Due to my poor choice, I lost my friends, connection with my children, physically lost one of my children, and nearly lost my struggling marriage. Trusting a church cult was the worst thing I could have done! That day has forever changed my life! I feel guilty that I stupidly trusted people from a church cult to help me work through some difficult personal and family things. I REALLY KNEW BETTER! It was a terrible choice and decision to trust a church cult to help me sort out my personal, family issues. I will always feel guilty for trusting people who I KNEW were untrustworthy! It cost me all my relationships and a child. That day will always change how I see any religious group, due to what happened! I made a terrible mistake that leaves me feeling horribly heartbroken and guilty!
@4Jasmine thank you for opening up and sharing, jasmine. I'm so sorry to hear about the immense difficulties and losses you've faced due to trusting that church group. That must have been an incredibly painful decision to make in such a crisis moment, and the consequences have understandably left deep wounds. How are you feeling in the aftermath of such heartbreaking betrayal and loss? M
@ASilentObserver
I have lost faith and trust in people. I have become inwardly cynical about anything and everything that connects with the individuals and the events that occurred. I still struggle with residual anger and resentment about what and how things were handled. The guilt of not being able to let it all go graciously, as I am trying to move on, is unbelievably difficult. I was given no mercy, no grace, no love, or kindness by anyone involved. It was brutal and left me painfully isolated and deeply wounded. I will go on and survive as I have after prior deep woundings. Healing and being able to truly trust is a process that takes time. I know that I will reach a place of forgiveness and peace once again, slowly over time.
@4Jasmine, your statement about healing and trust is really beautiful and something I will hold on to. I hope you can too; yes it does take time, sometimes lots of time. Take care
@4Jasmine Thank you for sharing your experience with me. It sounds like you've endured deep pain and loss of trust that has left feelings of anger, resentment and isolation. Those are understandable emotions after being hurt in such a way with no support. We are all here with you to listen to and to support. You are not alone in this.
Yes I have a horrible guilt that I carry and it makes me feel worthless and a burden
@Marisol8023 I am sorry to hear you are experiencing feelings of guilt that are making you feel worthless and like a burden. Those emotions can be really difficult to cope with. What is contributing to those feelings of guilt?
@ASilentObserver
I feel guilty for holding grunges when the person has not apologized yet or made up for what they did. You can say sorry but it doesn’t always appear to me that you’re sorry so I often hold grunges (especially against all the toxic people in my life).
@ivoryDog4942 It sounds like holding onto feelings of resentment has weighed heavily on you. Your feelings are natural and valid.
@ivoryDog4942
I totally relate to what you have shared.
@ASilentObserver Do you have any guilt? How did it make you feel?
I have some guilt stemming from separating myself from my addicted mother before her passing. Her addiction caused a lot of issue, such as violence and manipulation, and I needed to keep it away from my children. She passed in January, I feel like maybe if I had not pushed her away she wouldn't have overdosed. IDK
@MadameSLeePy I am sorry to hear that Madame but thank you for opening up about it. It sounds like you are experiencing difficult emotions around your mother's passing and the separation before. Feeling guilt is so understandable in this painful situation. You must have loved your mother deeply to want the best for both her and your children. What feelings are most prominent for you as you reflect on this time?
