I'm just trapped in my own head and can't remember what it feels like to be happy..
It's just I see my step dad drinking his life away every night, my mum is getting depressed watching him do this and she's struggling and ends up taking it out on me and him. And then I watch my girlfriend closing herself into a game and talking to random people on there and shutting me out kind of, because she's depressed and she's abused by her mum but she just can't see the bad that is in her mother..and she ends up taking that out on me.
And just everything lately has gotten a little too much for me. I start my second year at university next week and I really can't be bothered with it. My first year wasn't exactly exciting or fair. I just imagine being back in college having the time of my life and how I just took it for granted and wished it away.
I've not been sleeping well either, I've been thinking suicidal thoughts and cutting my arms. I never understood self harming before but these days for me, it's just a cry out for help. My girlfriend gets really mad at me if she's seen cuts on my arms or I open up about how I don't want to be alive, but all I want is support from her. I just see no future for myself. I've been off it for days with her and when she's asked me what's wrong, I just can't bring myself to tell her. I can't bring myself to tell anybody because I know people will just think the wrong things. I nearly went to the doctors a few days ago but I get worried they'll give me medication or something and it'll mean that I can't drive. I passed my test in May and my grandma bought me a car in August, and my car and driving around in it is the only real escape I feel...
@JLL118 Hello! I understand that you are really going through a lot for quite some time already. I imagine how confused and frustrated you are and I can see why you hesitate in going to the doctor. But maybe you may want to consider talking to someone close and trustworthy or consulting to a professional, people who only want the best for you...
WARNING DONT give your money to the site, it's a trap. They know how to get you to give money to help the site and yourself. But it's not true. Even the therapy page isn't full of real therapist. It's a trap!!!! We can't say it enough. They just using you. The site is going down hill and no body wants to do anything about it. If anybody says anything bad about the site you get banned. Anybody says how something can be improved , if it was by Laura or glen or Amelia then your banned!!! You don't get any second chances. It's all fake. Banning listeners and members account not seeing how it fucks people up. You have teens telling the higher up about adult listeners which half of it is fake. No offline contract allowed? Yet they all do it. And mentors are allowed to do it. Also twitter is a base of offline. They telling us to not to do something that they are doing and are telling us to make a twitter account ??? Dojt get me wrong it's great but this rule for adults is stupid. We grown people we should be able to do offline. If somebody gets upset or trust the wrong people it's they fake.Glen is using your money you give to the site for himself!!!! We don't know what he is using it for, but it wouldn't shock anybody if it was to get his hair back. fuck glen moriarty, deplorable beast conning the mentally ill. PLEASE SHARE WITH EVERYBODY