Part 3

knew my father did t like me or had hard time with me (not to mention i knew things about him which were unsavory) but I never thought he'd wish to ruin my life without getting fact straight nor would I imagine him thinking it okay to essentially kill your own kid through public mobbing. There are still things idk....this is true but it not the first time my mind d has blanked out and went on auto pilot during a stressful situation. So I believe my story can be believed and I can be trusted. My back ground  is not that of hurting ppl. Im Scared of ppl, i have hard time  talking to others, I was not good in school and got bullied frequently to point I dropped out of highschool.....no...I'm not saying g I'm a saint by any means I did make fun of a kid my age when I was in middle school but I apologized to him. Idk what else to say to clear this situation up....I know I'm right... further more so e have eluded to the fact that the lady I stayed with for that week I was kicked out of house has told ppl we had a relationship which is impossible, I was a Virgin till 21 and was shy with new ppl. I loss my virginity to a woman. Named Christy. To make matters worst I had friends who knew this was going on, these rumors were being g spread and did nothing to help. I gave no clue....now I can't clear any of it up and ppl think I'm some kind da child hurting abuser or worst. Im batyralky a giving person which has been shown my entire life....again I am no sai t...yes I help ppl, try to encourage ppl but there are times I say very hurtful horrible things when Im Hurting ir mad....I dont see how ppl can't believe me. Other than I did tell tales cause I was insecure about myself....which does not excuse that action and am willing g to admit that. But given my entire history and present history of being abused and not hurting others or getting bitter I think ppl should give me the chance. I dont expect ppl to believe me or think they will try to stop it....I have more I could say but it gets redundant after a but....it's just...how can I correct or fix what I either A. was not told was broken or B. did not remember it being broken properly. I went my whole life not knowing......I've told many ppl thus and it only get worst...Im even admitting g I don't remember everything . So how am I trying  to be bad....how do I get it to stop? I was told it never will till.....ya know.....tgat can't be just or fair. I dk....sorry to vent it's just....thats why I think my future is hopeless. I'd line to meet a woman and settle down or fix d a good friend....but i don't think that'll happen ever now.