When I'm alone, one thing I do is .........

When Im alone, I usually start off with some negative thoughts. I think of all the top 3 negative things going on in my life and break them down. It sorta makes it feel like there are more than just three things going on but when I break down my problems I realize they can be major but its less than I originally thought them to be. I sometimes think of ways to solve them, or how to work around them if I can. Then Ill talle my mind off of it all by eating or singing and playing an instrument.

When I'm alone, I talk to myself. Like, a lot. It sounds weird, but it helps me sort a lot of crap out.

I read. I love to read and it lets my mind escape the anxieties of life. For a while I get lost in the book and feel like Im in a different place

Sometimes I just think about things and start crying, I also think about hurting myself in some way like cutting but I haven

When I am alone I am always keeping my mind busy and my hands . I am never bored because my mind never allows me too be even growing up I never said I am so bored because there is so many things we can do. As I have aged and became disabled I still do not know what boredom is so when asked if I ever get bored I can only replay No and I have no clue what it even feels like which is odd because I sure have felt everything else..

I stay online alot helping others even before I came here.

I play games on a online site that are non violent.

I watch movies.

I get up and do what I can when i feel well enough.

I talk on the phone.

I color and love it , the adult coloring books and some really cool Gel Pens from walmart they are awesome and so vibrant.

I draw

I read

I do Karaoke I even bought the mics with a speaker built in and you have different controls they are awesome and I use the Youtube Karaoke , My friends come over and sing also and its so fun!!! Or I do it on my own and I am horrible!!

I have a Bird that never shuts up lol but I dont want her too!

I love decorating or doing something with a glue gun but i end up burning myself every time!! I am not kidding lol.

I Love WIGS!! I have over 30 , I had brain sugery and I hate how its messed with my head so I started buying wigs I dont wear them out because I am agoraphobia but they are also hot and heavy so I put them on for fun and take the photos and post them on my facebook and people pick what looks the best on me lol its kinda a game for everyone . Odd I know right!! lol

Okay well this is just something about me and what I do .

Peace

Tyedyedbutterfly :)

Cry cause no one can see me.

I bump old songs from the 80s and 90s when people had way more things to make happy songs about.

I wonder if anyone cares or thinks about me when I'm not around them.

I sing. Music is my escape and center a lot of the time.

Study and listen to depressing songs that somehow remind me of the shame and how my friends turned their backs on me and it was all my fault.

I honestly see myself hung on a tree sometimes and drinking poison out of a bottle to end my miserable life, and I know I'm such a hypocrite because there was a time when I said that those who are weak and want to end their lives should and yet here I am still alive.

Being a hypocrite was another flaw they picked at and I couldn't agree more I guess.