How to support a family member going through a loss of a baby
Hi there, this post is a heavy one to make. Someone close to me had just given birth yesterday. The poor baby had a serious condition and unfortunately passed away at birth. The condition was known about, so the loss wasn't sudden, but that still doesn't change the fact that they are grieving parents who just lost their baby. How do we support them moving forward, especially after the initial first days of grief pass to not cause them more distress?
@sadcat13
Loss and grief affects everyone differently. It is a lot to process and can take a toll. You can support them just by being there for them during this time. Being present helps a lot.
@Schlag thank you. We are trying our best
@sadcat13
🥺
I'm so sorry to hear that
How heartbreaking 🩷
At times like this, it's important to just follow their lead, let them know you are there for whatever they need.
Some people want to talk, others don't, let them set the tone 🩷
@Amanda84 thank you. For now most of the important communication was handled by my cousin's mom, so it seems like they are taking some time to process the loss on their own. They just responded to our condolences with a thank you and hearts in the family group chat, so I think right now they are not ready for more contact. I researched a little about what's an appropriate gift to comfort grieving parents and u found a lovely bracelet with the baby's birthstone. I saw a lot of moms on here too who experienced loss and appreciate when their angel babies aren't forgotten, so ordered one for them. I also sent them a food delivery gift card that should be enough for at least 3-4 meal orders, sending them the redeeming code and a few kind words attached to it that do not need further contact. We already have a funeral date and I asked for a day off from work to attend it. Well it's more of a memorial since the burial itself will be on a different place, but we all want to go and support them
@sadcat13
That was perfect , a food parcel, not having to think about practicalities like cooking, so helpful and the bracelet, what a beautiful gift, you are being there, that's what counts 🩷
@Amanda84 they already responded being surprised and very grateful for the gift card. I will make sure to cash in from the entire fam once our salary comes to send them a bigger value one as a family gift too 😁
@sadcat13
Beautiful 💙
completly agree with amanda, it all depends on the needs and who they are as a person. Everyone needs different things. during these hard times it can be hard to navigate everything, and blank offers of "let me know if there is anything i can do to help" often then places the burden on them, when decision are hard. so maybe can offer specific support like "can i drop off a meal for you?" just be yourself, proivde that listening ear, your words dont have to be perfect, they wont ever feel like enough becuase they are mostly not, but your presence will matter the world.
contiune to show up months and years from now. most support will fade in a few weeks but the grief doesnt.
@CaringEzra thank you for your advice. I just sent them a food delivery gift card. They are still processing the loss and not ready to talk, at least by how it seems, so just sent them the link to redeem it and wrote a gentle message to it that showed support. Also asked for leave at work so I can attend the funeral
@sadcat13
that is a lovely gester, here with you
@CaringEzra 🤍🤍🤍