Dating with Poor Mental Health is a No-No🙅
So, I'm looking around this dating site and ran across this guy's profile. In reading, it says "Don't Message me if your FAT". Now, this was almost triggering to me as I am not skinny, I am fat. If your someone like me who struggles with self-image issues or low self-esteem, this could put you in a very low place. It's like, why do we torture ourselves when we don't have to? The world we live in is ran by technology and unrealistic beauty standards not to forget discrimination\racism. It's awful. I would rather work on myself and tend to what I need from me than to have to master a requirement list for someone who may not even like me anymore after 3 month's or so. You can't please everyone and it's not your job to. I'm just writing this out because it bugs me. How do you all feel about dating and your mental health status? What helps you improve yourself mentally? What makes you feel strong? What mantras do you repeat to yourself everyday? I would love to know❤
@DaisyBeeBlooming
Hi there Daisy! So nice of you to stop by the Healthy Living Subcom. Its so nice to meet you.... I'm Ocean the Team Leader for the HL Subcom here.
First, I'm sorry to hear that you had that experience. And its certainly understandable how it would make one feel if you are one to already struggle with Self-Image and Self-Esteem issues. I've been there, and I'm certain all of here have at one point. Otherwise, none of us would be here at 7cups. I think and feel that all of our Health concerns go "hand-in-hand" with one another. What affects us Physically, in turn can affect us emotionally & mentally (and VICE/VERSA)......
While I certainly agree the world is ran by technology and can portray very unrealistic beauty standards, in all honesty, the technology doesn't even have to be there. It can simply be comparing ourselves with a stranger on the street, a friend, or family member etc...that can still cause us to struggle with ourselves in some way.... (and as you also stated, add discrimination on top of that over various things) as there can be so much for people to find to discriminate against in this world! Which yes, can put us in a low place. And I do agree that it can be and feel very awful.
I have found the older that I have gotten, (while I do still have things that I would like to work on and improve and find myself doing so everyday as much as I am able)...I too have realized that there really is no pleasing everyone around us that we know or meet. I have really grown and learned that I can't be responsible for what others think or feel about "me" personally. THAT is THEIR Problem to deal with.... and NOT mine! I've spent so much time over my life trying to "please" others around me in so many areas of my life, that I found there were certain aspects that were causing me to be unhappy, and causing me to miss (and not give full attention to) to the things that really 'Were, OR "ARE" Important right now. Or what should be priority.
And what I have really grown even more to learn is that MY Overall 'Well-being" is the MOST important because theres not way that I (or we) can be good for anyone else, if we can't be good to and for "ourselves"!... So that is something to consider when getting into a relationship. Or, even if you are already in one.
Things that help "Me" personally to improve myself mentally have been finally learning to take time for myself when needed! Making time for Self Care! (Getting away, taking a vacation, taking a step back from certain things in my life if I find that they are starting to stress me out) etc....This allows me time to clear my head and "regroup". Thus, allowing me to feel "stronger" in a sense when I do.
I don't have any "mantras" persay. But, I do have many spiritual quotes and Bible Verses that are very important to me and speak to me personally that help to keep me going and moving along~
@PoliteOcean It's nice to meet you as well! Everything you wrote was exactly what I was trying to say. Yes even without technology, I still find myself comparing in a negative way making myself feel even more down. I have many thing's to work on. I appreciate you for reading and hearing what I was saying. Your words are encouraging and full of wisdom❤
@DaisyBeeBlooming
Aww... thank you Daisy. Thats really sweet of you. Any "wisdom" (which I appreciate you saying) has just come from a long time of living the experiences that I have. And any thing I can share, or pass along, I do my best to try. I have been there... And still experience these things from time to time. Its not easy. But, we learn from these things. And we continue to do our best to keep pushing forward, and growing. So that maybe, the next time, things don't affect us like they once did. Because we have now grown that much stronger from it all!....
I'm glad that you felt I was able to encourage you in some way... And just want you to know that YOU are beautiful no matter what! And we should never (easier said than done sometimes) take the word of a total stranger or anyone else for that matter and let it define "WHO & WHAT" we are in anyway (inside and out)!
Just know that we are totally here for you! And we hope to see you stop by here more to share with us! 
@PoliteOcean Yeah maybe that's what I should do. Just keep living & your very much right to take thing's with a grain of salt. I'm glad to be apart of such a safe space❤
@DaisyBeeBlooming yeesh at least guys like that save you a bunch of time by openly broadcasting that they're a jerk and to avoid them! Who would want to date a guy who says that anyways, what an idiot 🤦♂️
@FoxPrince your comment made me giggle in a good way. Yes at least they are letting other's know ahead of time who they truly are and I couldn't date anyone like that. I like food too much. Lol