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Gender is confusing for me.

User Profile: strawberry1377
strawberry1377 April 25th, 2025

People around me talk about gender and pronouns, but I don't get it. What would make me a girl? What would make me a guy? How does one know the difference? When someone asks my gender or pronouns, I usually say genderfluid and all pronouns. But to be honest, I feel like gender doesn't exist? If that makes sense. What makes someone a certain gender? How they act? What they wear? People always talk about dressing and acting yourself, but then you have to find a gender for yourself that fits how you are. It doesn't make any sense to me.

3
User Profile: Aayla
Aayla April 25th, 2025
@strawberry1377 well, gender is a social construct, so technically it is all made up! Personally, I would define gender as a self-identification that can be influenced by a variety of factors, including the specific gender roles and stereotypes in the society you live in. Yes, socially constructed ideas of "masculinity", "femininity" etc. are all made up and they varied a lot through different places and times in history. But those ideas matter to some people, and they can choose to identify themselves based on that. For other people, those ideas make no sense, and in that can you can identify as gender fluid or agender or whatever makes the most sense to you.
Yet other cases include people who, for example, still identify as a woman but defy social stereotypes of femininity. You're right, gender does not "exist" as an innate quality (like sexual traits of the body do), which means we can all make what we want of it!
User Profile: GalaxyDino
GalaxyDino May 31st, 2025

If someone says they’re x gender, they’re x gender. If someone says they don’t have a gender, they’re don’t have a gender. Etc. That’s all there really is to it. As long as you’re not hurting anyone, there’s no wrong way to be. If gender doesn’t exist for you yourself that’s fine but not everyone feels like that.

Honestly, just try not to overthink it too much.