Hopeless
I'm feeling really sad and hopeless. I feel like a scared girl inside of a man's body. I have a beautiful wife and 2 girls and I'm just so sad all the time to have such a limited existence. Girls get to have all the fun, they get the best clothes and everyone smiles at them and wants to make life wonderful for them. And I'm stuck in this stupid body and I don't resonate with guys at all, and I just want sisterhood. I want to be cute. I want to be pretty. I want to have grown up with friends. I'm so lonely. I feel so hopeless. It's too late for me. I'll never have a childhood, never grow up with a group of girls, never have lifelong friends, sisters. I'm a mistake, a freak, and the world doesn't want me here. I don't belong. I'll always be on the outside.
you are not a freak in any way!!
I am not trans myself, so I cant understand your exact struggle, but I can offer you some kind words :)
I guarantee you that you will be able to be unapologetically yourself one day, even if it feels impossible now. it doesn't matter what's on the outside, because you are a pretty girl!! you just got a body that wasn't right, and that's ok!! I know one day you're gonna look back on this and be so proud of how far you've come, you just need time :)