parenting question of sorts

@zachsmom12032013 Hi there. I normally try to avoid sharing my input when it comes to topics such as this just because of how sensitive and controversial it is. But if you ask me, I absolutely do believe some kids can just know what "feels" right to them and know what they like without influence. Of course too, environmental factors and experiences can play a part. And sure, sexuality can be fluid as people grow and change. It's different for everyone and everyone's story may be different. In the case of your son's best friend having had a boyfriend at that age or him liking boys, it would be no different than a preteen girl knowing she's attracted to a boy at her school. People just like what they like, right? I'm surprised the boy was able to open up and confide in your son to share something so personal. That says a lot about their friendship. I'm not sure if my comment helped in anyway, but some things can just be complicated and attaching labels sometime complicates things even more. 

@zachsmom12032013

You want the best life for your son.

We live in world that punish gay & especially trans folks right now. So your seeing this through a lens of, "Please, don't be gay your life's going to be so much harder." And that's a natural impulse of cis-hetrosexual parent in the hetro-normative world. You love your child and want what's best for them.

The reality is gay has been around 200,000yrs. As long as we have been a species. Asking "can a 12yr old know there gay?" How about you flip the question and ask, can a 12yr old know they are only in hetero sexual relationships? Most people minds will say "Duh, that's normal." But that's not real. That's your heterosexual social programming, defining straight as the better state of existing. 

If you can de-program yourself and stop defining heterosexual as superior, you might be able to come to understand that being gay is perfectly normal. Young people pairing up to experiment with different types of social pairing should be celebrated instead of questioned & interrogated. You might be able to find a more compassionate lens to view the situation.