how do i find other queer people in a christian school?
my family has made me go to a private christian school, one with students who are openly homophobic. i just really want to find people like me who i can relate to and who can relate to me, to have someone to talk to about these kinds of things because while the few friends i have that are supportive are very sweet, they just don't get it, and i would just really like other friends who are queer, yk? does anyone have any suggestions on how to find queer kids like me?
@apple3pie
Being in a school where there is a lot of open homophobia can certainly further complicate the challenge of connecting with other people who identify as LGBTQ+. I'm glad you have friends who are supportive and hopefully accepting, but it's true it can be harder for them to relate to your experiences.
As to connecting with others who identify as LGBTQ+ in a space where being "out" isn't exactly safe, people often try to find subtle ways to signal they are LGBTQ+. For example I remember many times when I was younger it would be "I love your rainbow shoelaces! Like my rainbow bracelet?" Another common signal used to be pink triangles.
Unfortunately those used to be less obvious signals than they are now, though even then I tended toward less obvious rainbows, so unless someone was looking more closely it would be easier for them to miss. Essentially it was about trying to send out these subtle clues and then looking for them from others. In the end it still required taking a bit of a risk of self-identifying when trying to confirm these potential signals on someone else. People may still use some of these signals or even new ones. However since they are more widely known, people might be more careful not wanting to give themselves away.
I do hope you will be able to connect with teens like you, but if not in school perhaps you can find others here on 7 cups? Perhaps others here can give insight onto how they connect with LGBTQ+ peers as well.
@apple3pie
Oddly enough, I'm in a similar situation. Been enrolled in a Private Islamic school where the students are openly homophobic and we unironically study units about how being queer is bad. Even had a kid get expelled because the principal found out he was queer.
But yeah, in my 5 years there I have met 5 queer people. 3 of them are my best friends and the other 2 told me they were but had to stay closeted. It is an extremely hard thing to deal with tbh. One thing I do know is that there are some signals to broadcast to other LGBT people that you are queer. I think one was like cuffing your pant leg or asking about someone's rainbow shoelaces. Issue with these is that not everyone knows them lol. You could maybe try wearing something like a bracelet with a Pride flag that represents you on it (maybe not a rainbow one because that is kind of obvious).
Hope everything goes well and I am always open to questions!