Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Just found out Wife dated an old man

User Profile: toughClementine5697
toughClementine5697 January 28th

we got married in oct to a woman of my dream and felt like a winnner only to find out that she dated a 54 y.o. man before me. we are 28 and 29 each. And she met with while I was gone out of town, not 1-1 but still dropped in to his event.

the 2 separate issues are:

1. I am disgusted by the fact that she dated an old man and wanted a family with him. This flips my image of her completely.
2. I feel betrayed cuz she secretly met him when I was gone

I feel betrayed and want to divorce, but we have a baby on the way, so I feel trapped. 

What do I do? It's been a month since I found out, and even though we talked through it, the trauma isn't going away. 

1
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 January 28th

@toughClementine5697

Do you really want to leave because she dated an older man?   if it is only about age?  why?  Would you feel as bad if she had a previous dating and thought of a future with someone 34? 

Going to a public event even if hosted or somehow connected to this person is not a betrayal IMO. 

she chose you and you are starting a family.  are you perhaps a bit freaked out feeling stuck and not ready to have a family and looking for a reason.