Irrational fear of men
Lately, I've developed a huge fear of my own gender, and by that, of myself.
By probability, it's far more common for men to commit crimes and to hurt others. It's a lot more probable that if I was walking by the streets a man would try to stab me and steal my things, for example.
And also, men tend to not care much about others feelings, not thinking of how big of a damage they do.
I am a male, and I accept myself as one. Yet I can't help but feel extremely terrified by the idea of what others like me have done... Of what I am capable of doing.
@AxlMega
I understand. I am not a big guy myself, but a have a extremely delicate older sister (she has health issues). there have been times I was terrified to just lightly touch her or hug her, worried I would accidentally hurt her. she is doing a little better now, and have learned (for the most part) how to control my strength so I'm not very scared of hurting her and mostly treat her as normal (as much as I can) cuz I understand everyone needs someone to treat them normally. Sorry kinda went on a ramble.
Every man (and woman to I suppose?) should have a healthy fearful respect of their own strength. That's being said it's harder said then done. I can't give much advice other than practice with your strength, figure out your limits through exercise or martial arts, once you know what you truly can do it's easier to control because you know how much goes into every action.
Everything I have said so far has only been about physical strength and not about how men are more likely to commit crimes. That's a tough one to come to grips with, I really don't have much to say there other than the crime rate has been dropping. While I personally think women commit more crimes than people think, it's now where near explaining the huge difference.
Sorry I rambled a lot, I hope something I said helped even the tiniest bit, even if it's just someone understands a little bit.
I'll be praying for you mate 🩵
@AxlMega
On one hand, my first thought was: it is much better not to generalize, because such stereotypes can be very harmful. I believe there is not a single pattern either for a man, or for a woman, especially nowadays. And thinking that every man is born a criminal would be at least unfair.
But on the other hand, I understand your beliefs might be based on your very personal experiences or traumas - and that is fully understandable.
Sometimes we have negative ideas about men or women because of people who hurt us in the past. Sometimes it can be a mom telling her child (a daughter OR a son) things like "all men are evil". It can be really devastating. I've experienced it myself.
But I also remember a thing said to me by a therapist very long ago: "Do you think that being a man must mean being drunk, aggressive, dirty and coarse? Nope. That does not seem to be true."
Being a man is protecting the people (and not only people sometimes) who are physically weaker or innocent.
Being a man is abstaining from aggression, except from the situation when loved ones have to be defended. Because a real man knows the power of his arms and mind could be destructive when wrongly used.
A strong man is usually sober, not drunk, because he doesn't need to take his strength from alcoholic or narcotic illusions of grandiose.
A real man is able to understand emotions of a man (including himself), of a woman or of a child.
A man is someone who is leaving the sinking ship as last, first making sure that everyone else is safe. And the first to face the danger.
A man should be a person of wisdom and trustworthiness, whose attitudes are as far as possible free from better or worse moods or better or worse days.
A real man is interested in spirituality.
But still there have been some men who feel weak or lost, or selfish, and try to compensate it in a harmful way instead of healing it...
@AxlMega Everyone looks the same underneath. Just flow with the doubts and use them to put you in a state of faith.