How do you "mindfully" handle rejection?
Live your life for you not for anyone else. Dont let the fear of being judged, rejected or disliked stop you from being yourself. ~Sonya Parker
"What did I do wrong?" or "Why don't they want to talk to me no more?" or "I'm just not worth it to anyone" I bet hearing these words make you feel you not someone good enough-right? As unpleasant as "rejection" is IT'S PART OF LIFE, and even me and mine is not exception. As time went by and I had kids and allowed myself to engage in the worls, I invited rejection into my life. A crush I had only wanted to be friends. Something I ran for in school I wasn't elected. I didn't get that promotion. Wow rejection friggin hurts!!!
Discussion:
1. What does rejection look like to you?
2. When you are rejected how do you think and feel? Can you explain this?
3. Now that you shared on how you are feeling and thinking, how do you think mindfulness skills can help refocus you and give you some grounding?
4. Can you share on some skills that help you desculate the negative feelings/thoughts when you are dealing with rejection?
Some helpful mindfulness exercise:
Why We All Need To Practice Emotional First Aid-Ted Talks https://bit.ly/1vTarDo
How to Handle Rejection as a High Sensation Seeking, Highly Sensitive Person https://bit.ly/2iwiyu6
Dealing With Rejection https://bit.ly/2nO6er1
4 ways Mindfulness can help with rejection https://bit.ly/2w2rjkn
@awesomerainbow @adocker @adventurousfan @Ady23 @AutumnLeigh @amiablePeace77 @AMusicalSilence @astray @AnActiveListener @AjanMalic @adaptiveLight27 @aifos1976 @agreeablekite4304 @asilentobserver @alfalfasproutdeux @ambitiouschestnut9158 @ambitiouscity3124 @basty @blueocean @BillyWilson @babybenfin @behindhazeleyes @billywilson @BlueberryFriend @blueocean45 @borderinline @BuddhistDracula @blueDiamond @brilliomturtle89 @bluewolf1229 @benevolentOrange31 @callforhelp @char1otte @CrissiArabela @Claito @calmHero86 @courtmarievibes @DarkCoffee @diplomaticShade2167 @Deeperblue @enigmaforte @EnigmaForte @emilyLanes @EmunahHere @EastAfrique @Eccho@Evaparker02 @essdee Fairhouse @FreeSoul1417@fighter23 @Gaara @GhostInTheShellx @Gozzil @happydandan @helpfulHuman4993 @helping2findaway @Harleemoon @honeydinkley @Hereyzzil @hopeless104 @InvisibleAngel92 @Itsybitsyspider91 @inventiveOrange1 @joyoussun45 @kindsoul10 @kirtokun0731@kevan @Kodachrome73 Joe2017 @JustLikeMellie @Jenna0903 @joyoussun47 @JenSee @KatMae @KrinkTheMellowUnicorn @kvo8 @KattPiper @Lionellinu13 @lia345 @Learntolive @LilaGrace @lightforlife @lilynoelle @LilyLila @lightofhope89 @Lovejoy @leothelittlelioncub1 @melliontm @Mikey123 @Musicismyfriend @NoDramaBabyLlama @nourrirvotreame @obie2 @oxfordshiregatsby @passionatepeyton @Pat @peacefulwarrior10 @penguinpower31 @peppermintlove @phoenixAsh @PiecesofYou@pleiades20 @Pininin @PinkMallow @pizzalover1341 @politeAvocado7234 @politelychaotic @princessofcurcus @probius @psalm139 @PurpleSnowflake2310 @Power @politeskies6536 @rachelq @resilience @rumplesteeleskin @rosesway @Rcusick12 @sailorelix @saif1for1 @Saltydog68 @ Samar27 @santysan @sensitiveShade5337 @silverWillow1625 @singblue @smileyPower @Softforesthsp77 @soulrestorer102 @soulsings @Spearstar @sujaypai @SunFern @SunFlower @sweetmango91 @summertimesamness @stillLavender24 @tazcares @tjb28 @tisjme @unicornbunny @victoriia @wildcat85 @Wawas @XxOgSpunBbygrl @yogibear10 @yzxil @zeraphim
Wow. That's a big one. I don't think I'm there yet.
Wow this is an old post haha XD
1. What does rejection look like to you?
I guess being refused or told off kinda. It's that feeling when you stub your toe on the corner of your dresser. XD
2. When you are rejected how do you think and feel? Can you explain this?
Honestly I'm someone that has a pretty selective memory so I first I feel a dissapointed sometimes crushed and I worry about interacting with that person in the future. But it kinda goes away and there's really no point to dwell in the past.
3. Now that you shared on how you are feeling and thinking, how do you think mindfulness skills can help refocus you and give you some grounding?
I think mindfullness can really help me reflect on what happened and my feelings afterwards. It may make me feel embarassed or hurt thinking about it but ultimately it can help me avoid a situation similar to what happened in the future.
4. Can you share on some skills that help you desculate the negative feelings/thoughts when you are dealing with rejection?
I like to do things that distract me from what happened and it helps the negative feelings go away. But like, it's really important to understand the feelings that are involved with rejection so if you ever have to reject someone, you can do it in a better way to lessen the negative feelings they will feel afterwards.
Question for ppl out there:
How does respectfully rejecting someone else look like to you?
1. What does rejection look like to you?
A person not accepting of who one is.
2. When you are rejected how do you think and feel? Can you explain this?
It feels terrible, especially if you care about the person. I allow myself to feel whatever I need to feel and let it go. I then let the person go. Everyone has the right to leave. Relationships are voluntary.
3. Now that you shared on how you are feeling and thinking, how do you think mindfulness skills can help refocus you and give you some grounding?
It allows you to take a breath, be in the moment and realize that in this moment, all is well and as it should be.
4. Can you share on some skills that help you desculate the negative feelings/thoughts when you are dealing with rejection?
Gladly! Remember, if someone is rejecting you, especially in a mean manner, it is on them. Perhaps, they can't handle your awesome self. That is ok! Another will come into your life that will see you for you, accept you for you, and love you for you! You are worthy of having supportive people who want to be around you.
... By realizing that not everyone is going to like you. There is also no need to try and "conform" in order to gain someone else's approval.
This person doesn't like you, that's their loss. At the end of the day there may be an issue manifesting within the person doing the "rejecting".
Move on , find others who approve of you, as well as be thankful for the ones that already do.
It's that simple.
@Memi I couldn
@Memi in this day and age, nothing like this is ever simple anymore. Sure, move on. Find people who accept you. You may find a few but even that can be dicey.
We all talk the talk of wanting to accept people as they are and wanting them to accept us as we are. At times, I feel this is not sincere. In the real world, we have been subjugated by a government that makes it OK to disregard people who don't agree or have different views points. We overlay it with concerns about disapproval and paint a picture of acceptance and tolerance over it which, over time, wears away to expose our true nature. We don't have to care. No one makes us care. Our environment not only says that this is OK, but that is part of the norm. And no one will necessary criticize you about it.
This is especially true on this website. But it's cleverly disguised as acceptance and approval. The fact is, a majority of people here really don't care. One simply needs to read these exaggerated profiles, and the pending outcomes from it, to see that.
"I really care about you."
"No judgement from me."
"I love everyone."
"I've been through what you've been through."
"You can tell me everything."
"I really want to listen to you."
On and on and on. To me, this is mediocrity at its finest. Anyone can say anything online - and in real life - just to appease the masses. And if the root of insincerity starts from the inside, the fruit of its labor is this phony dialog that has no real world significance. In other words, I'm only pretending to care.
Granted, this post is coming across as negative and spiteful but when a vast majority of listeners, and people in the world, make outrageous "car
@Ranmusic.....sorry, got "snipped"....people make outrageous "care statements." If this only happened from time to time, I wouldn't even be here. But it happens virtually every time.
So yeah, move on. Find someone who will accept you. The problem is no one does. But that's OK since we can't do a thing about it.
Try to ignore it and let it pass away. Maybe its not meant to be.
I should think its a natural thing to be rejected sometimes. Not everything i do will succeed
@Xtintin exactly!
You think about the situation realistically and dont jump to quick conclusions. Take a second to breathe and think calmly.
@deanbinker The difference is amazing when you approach a situation with a clear mind
Normally I will get upset but then I remember that everything happens for a reason and maybe something good will com out of this.
@sensibleCat1945
You're right. It's most always for the best.
@sensibleCat1945 Amen 🙏
I like this question simply because it doesn
@silenttalker201
Oh, I didn't look at it that way! I should've. but your answer is great :)
@TheCollisionCourse
Thank you! <3
@silenttalker201 Absolutely👍. The best thing is it to try not to internalize any form of rejection . That
@ShawnWilsonLCSW
Yea I completely agree!
By realizing that not everyone is perfect for you and you are not perfect for anybody. Sometimes it just doesn't work. Maybe it's you, maybe it's them. Sometime people just stop loving eacj other, for whatever reason. It just happens. It's not easy. But you have to keep in mind you deserve your own love story. Maybe it didn't work out this time, but it will, if you want it to. It most certainly will. You deserve someone who will love you back faithfully, irrevocably and honestly. You just have to have hope and keep looking.
Consider whether this person is even someone who I want to be accepted by. My values may be different and I shouldn't compromise them to be liked.
Consider what I might choose to do differently in the future, and what I might choose to do the same way. I can work harder to earn the respect of others and of myself. I may not be able to or want to change certain things about myself.
Acknowledge that the desire to churn mentally over this rejection or failure will slowly lose steam on its own, so it's ok to go along for the emotional rollercoaster ride without needing to "solve" anything.
