Borderline Personality Disorder
Hey everyone! I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and I ironically get a lot of guests and members whom I talk to who also have BPD.
Borderline Personality Disorder is often confused with Bi-polar disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder.
The criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder, in the DSM - 4 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 2004 edition) is:
The essential feature of Borderline Personality Disorder is a pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects, and marked impulsivity that begins by early adulthood and is present in a variety of contexts. Individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder make frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment (Criterion 1). The perception of impending separation or rejection, or the loss of external structure, can lead to profound changes in self-image, affect, cognition, and behavior. These individuals are very sensitive to environmental circumstances. They experience intense abandonment fears and inappropriate anger even when faced with a realistic time-limited separation or when there are unavoidable changes in plans (e.g., sudden despair in reaction to a clinician's announcing the end of the hour; panic or fury when someone important to them is just a few minutes late or must cancel an appointment). They may believe that this "abandonment" implies they are "bad." These abandonment fears are related to an intolerance of being alone and a need to have other people with them. Their frantic efforts to avoid abandonment may include impulsive actions such as self-mutilating or suicidal behaviors, which are described separately in Criterion 5.
BPD is manifested by a pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation. This is called "splitting."
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating). Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior.
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days).
Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.
As a Borderline, I feel it is best to educate others in the disorder.
How to cope ? For the Borderline Personality
Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT)
What is DBT?
Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) treatment is a cognitive-behavioral approach that emphasizes the psychosocial aspects of treatment. The theory behind the approach is that some people are prone to react in a more intense and out-of-the-ordinary manner toward certain emotional situations, primarily those found in romantic, family and friend relationships. DBT theory suggests that some people?s arousal levels in such situations can increase far more quickly than the average person?s, attain a higher level of emotional stimulation, and take a significant amount of time to return to baseline arousal levels.
People who are sometimes diagnosed with borderline personality disorder experience extreme swings in their emotions, see the world in black-and-white shades, and seem to always be jumping from one crisis to another. Because few people understand such reactions ? most of all their own family and a childhood that emphasized invalidation ? they don?t have any methods for coping with these sudden, intense surges of emotion. DBT is a method for teaching skills that will help in this task.
How to Cope? For the Non Borderline Personality
For people who are not borderlines but have someone they care about that is, I have come up with the following links to help research for you!
Living With and Loving Someone With BPD
~The Getting Better BPD Articles~
The following articles were written for people who are non-borderlines, but borderlines should also real these articles to help better understand themselves.
AND THE OSCAR GOES TO . . . ? Borderlines in Film and Television
BLACKMAILED INTO FATHERHOOD; Borderline women, and men who love them.
AT ANY COST: Saving your Life after Loving a Borderline.
THE BORDERLINE PARENT - Surviving Childhood
THE BORDERLINE PERSONALITY CLIENT
*NEW* LOVING A BORDERLINE - Inside the BPD Odyssey
*THE MALE BORDERLINE - Surviving the Crash after your Crush
BORDERLINE PERFECT - Splitting, Splicing and Projection in BPD Personalities
BREAKING UP WITH A BORDERLINE: There must be 50 Ways to leave your Lover.
IF LOOKS COULD KILL - Anatomy of a Borderline
HOW TO TRAIN YOUR BORDERLINE - Crucial Strategies for Living with a BPD Partner
COULD MY BPD LOVER BE RIGHT ABOUT ME?? The Borderline and You
THERE MUST BE A PONY IN HERE, SOMEWHERE - Sorting Your Way Through the BPD Madness!
'TILL DEATH DO US PART - BPD and The Marriage Crucible
THE LESBIAN BORDERLINE - For the Love of Mother
THE GOOD WIFE - Who's helping You, when his Ex is a Borderline?
HAVEN'T WE MET BEFORE? The Borderline/Narcissist Couple
WHEN LOVE IS JUST A FOUR LETTER WORD - Understanding the Borderline Personality
OBSESSED WITH A BORDERLINE - A Matter of Attraction and Revulsion
BORDERLINE WAIFS AND UNSUNG HEROES; Rescuing The Woman Who Doesn't Want To Be Saved.
SHELL-SHOCKED! Clearing the Fallout from a Borderline Break-up
TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT - The Neurology of Love and Loss in Borderline Personalities
SALT TO THE WOUND - Moving Beyond Your Borderline Break-up
THE GIFT OF THE BORDERLINE; Going on Feeling & Getting to Healing.
If any of you have anything to add, please do!!!!
Wow, nice scarlet, you've put in a lot of work! Maybe someday there will be a training guide for personality disorders as well! But you did a great job here :)
Thanks so much Evi!!! :)
The managing emotions self help guide - click on help guides at top and then managing emotions to check it out - is for BPD. It is based on DBT. Please check it out and let us know what you think!
I knew it was based on DBT, but not for BPD, I saw it as just managing emotions in general, sorry! I did that help guide :) haha
Thanks guys!
When it comes to BPD in a member chat, first, unless they tell you they have it DO NOT DIAGNOSE THEM! Remember, this is a listening site, not a therapy site :) You should also educate yourself on the disorder, even other personality disorders.
BPD gets mistaken for histrionic often because histrionic's are compulsive attention seekers, Borderlines have a tendency for dramatics, and sometimes the attention seems to focus on them a lot whether wanted or unwanted, which is why they get mistaken for each other sometimes. A good way to work through BPD related topics in a member chat, you could refer to the links in the original post, or if you educated yourself on the disorder, use that knowledge as well. Mainly with BPD you'll be working through managing stress so you can also refer to the Managing Stress Help Guide
When it comes to supporting people who struggle with BPD, speaking for myself, when I was diagnosed, having someone there to listen to my post?diagnosis emotions helped a lot more than I though it would! If they are still confused but have come to grips with it, you can give them links to coping skills and articles (unless the person doesn't offend easy, I'd stay away from the GettingBetter articles because they are very brash.)
my friend thinks i have this disorder. im afraid to say these symptoms sound like me. i hope i can do a good job as a listener. taking it slow.
Did I ever say how awesome you are Scarlet?
Because you are rocking it!
Keep up the amazing work!
Scarlet, this isn't an area where we just need one guide! We need as many quality resources that we can find to best help. Thank you for sharing your resources!