Life with Borderline personality disorder. (BPD)
Hello all,
My name is Trae, and I have lived with Borderline personality disorder since the age of 16. (Im 24 now.)
Needless to say, the prognosis is not good. While I can be okay for a time, there will be a certain trigger or life event that will eventually come.
In the last few months, I've been through maybe 6-7 jobs, lost a relationship that was very good for me, and I've burned more bridges than I can even remember. Its almost like the people in my life never existed at all.
Every day is suffering. Its not a question of when will I split, it's a question of HOW will I split.
My emotions are so volatile, and my anger is so uncontrolled. I lost my mother at a very young age, and I am a victim of human trafficking/kidnapping which likely led to the diagnosis.
Im in need of support. Thank you all.
@funnyPlace9586
I'm so sorry you lost your mother so young 🥺
And that you were kidnapped.
I cannot imagine the anger, the fear, the sadness that comes with that.
And how one begins to even start healing.
I'm glad you could open up here and I hope anyone who might relate will reach out 💚
@funnyPlace9586
Hi Trae, welcome to 7 Cups. 💜 I can feel the hopelessness of all of the different aspects of that:
- 8 years of living with BPD
- Brought on by multiple really harsh/cruel experiences when you were younger
- Resulting in burning many bridges and losing jobs/people over the past few months
- With the realistic expectation that triggers/splitting will continue to happen and things will be full of suffering.
This link is a bit buried in the community page, but this page has a few resources. (It feels paltry and almost insulting to offer this with the promise of it being helpful against the background of everything you've described, but sharing in case if there's something in there that's helpful in some small way.) The most helpful link will probably be the first one for finding listeners to talk with who take chats on BPD.
https://www.7cups.com/forum/personalitydisorders/BorderlinePersonalityDisorder_326/ResourcesforBPD_268269/
I'd be happy to PM back and forth also if you're looking for someone to talk to about things 💜
@funnyPlace9586
Thank you for taking the time to tell us a bit about yourself. What you shared was not only brave but also on the path to a peaceful life. Yes, it will take time to get there, but you can and will achieve that <3
