Personality Disorders Community Check-in: June 19th–June 25th
Hello, PD Support Community!
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💜 How are you feeling today?
💛 What's something you're looking forward to next week?
If you prefer not to answer these questions, feel free to say hello, ask for a hug, or share anything else that's on your mind. 💚
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@QuietMagic
💜 How are you feeling today?
I had a very bad day today. Everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.
💛 What's something you're looking forward to next week? Planning on taking my fur baby out for training again. She is my service baby, and she loves it. But still need training.
@Rose1324
Aw, sorry that yesterday was bad. 😔 Anything jump out especially that made it feel worse than usual?
😀 She'll be a highly skilled fur baby soon! Hope that that goes well 💛
@QuietMagic
How are you feeling today?
we kinda feeling angry and well just other feelings. the 19th was mom 82 birthday. we called dad to wish mom a happy birthday. but all he wanted to talk about is how our brother is and poor him. we have a really hard time when dad talks about our oldest brother due to all the abuse he done from a very young age to us. but seem our parents not get it. dad always saying forgive and forget make up with family members. but him and others not even hear us not believe what we said happened even. so it make us angry now that we no emotionally numb any more.
we still love mom dad and both our brothers. but hate many of their actions in past and even now.
What's something you're looking forward to next week?
we looking forward to not having any doctors appointments next week. but not looking forward to heatwave that to start tomorrow for us and go until tueday or Wednesday. we to get over 90 F for us that very very very hot.
@stormieandpaws
Hey, that makes a lot of sense that you were feeling angry. You called to wish your mom a happy birthday, and he immediately steers the conversation to discussing your brother despite all of the traumatic experiences related to him. And then because he doesn't believe in what happened, "forgive and forget" feels like it's just another way of trying to erase the truth of what happened and negate your experience. 🙄
Oh yeah, I actually happened to see something recently about the heatwave. Heat indices close to 110 in some places... looks like I'll be affected also. 😊 Hope you're able to stay cool for the next few days.
@QuietMagic
thanks hope you can stay cool too
we tonight shared SC but also wrote this we like to give you the link so can read it thank you for the support
https://www.7cups.com/forum/poetry/EmotivePoetryTW_2629/crywithinnoonehears_356598/
@stormieandpaws
Hi, sorry for the delayed response 🙏
Thanks for sharing the poem. It fits really nicely with stuff that I remember you sharing recently in another check-in about your dad training you to see emotions as a weakness. Sounds like anger was the one exception that was considered okay to feel. And then you've expressed pretty nicely how the anger covers up other feelings that are there--but if people only see the anger then they might incorrectly think that's all there is ("so say we heartless and have no compassion").
It's tough lifting any kind of mask, not knowing how people will respond to the thing that will be hidden, or if they'll even believe that what you're sharing is real (if it catches them by surprise and they haven't seen it before). I guess unmasking happens in a controlled/gradual way with a smaller number of trusted people first and then it sort of expands outwards from there?
@QuietMagic
yes unmasking one has to be very careful due to if covering up abuses one has to be extra careful even years later that the abusers not well find out as many abusers will do anything they can to keep the ones they abused quiet sadly this can lead to them doing unthinkable things too that why many who been abused never speak out too but now we have the internet and well places other not know our full name phone number etc it can be a safe place to start healing in many ways
we have told parts of our story offline but not all of it yet but after we moved we was more open about it too as we away from them now and mostly safe too
hope others hear our story and can get free from abuse too as by knowing one not alone it helps so much
@stormieandpaws
That makes a lot of sense:
1) There can be safety risks with sharing things prematurely.
2) Online communities offer a level of anonymity and privacy that probably wasn't possible in the past, which can ease loneliness and also be a precursor to in-person sharing
@QuietMagic
yes also even them in abuse can seek help sometime they get information online they never know was out there that leads to them getting out of abuse into freedom from it
when we was younger we use to even look up things in other states for people online then give them the information that could empower them to find help offline they did not know was there
we wish someone would have did that for us when we was trapped with our kids in abuse we did not know about shelters and many other things did not even know about community mental health as if we know we would have went to them places so our goal is to get information to help get people free of abuse and so they can heal
something we did not have when in our awful abusive marriage we can not save everyone but if we can help one other person it one life at a time that will make the world better
I'm feeling pretty good, overall, but a little bit anxious.
Looking forward to my son's birthday party on Sunday, and his subsequent birthday on Monday, as well as spending time with my new man.
@kawaiikoreannn
Hi! Sorry for the delayed response 🙏
How did the birthday party go? (And spending time with the new man sounds exciting!) Was anxiety related to one of those two things?
Birthday party was so fun, my son really had a great time and I'm glad I did it. Anxiety was definitely related to the new guy, just the general anxiety with new potential relationship prospects. He seems really wonderful, i'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak.
@kawaiikoreannn
That's awesome that the party went well and he enjoyed it 😊
Makes sense with the relationship that it would be like "what's the catch... something has to go wrong, this is going too well..." 😅 I hope things continue to exceed expectations, lol.
Thank you, I appreciate that! I appreciate you and everything you do for this community. Have a wonderful week.
@kawaiikoreannn
Thank you! Hope you have a good week also 💜
@QuietMagic
💜 How are you feeling today? I am better than I was a few days ago.
💛 What's something you're looking forward to next week? Getting more things done this weekend.
@Rose1324
That's great that things feel like they've improved! And hope that you're able to be productive in the coming days. 💜