Authorative!
My boyfriend is authorative and he doesn’t realise how belittling he is when he is trying to help and call me out on my flaws. I don’t mind him correcting me but I don’t think it has a positive effect by the way he talks to me. I’m trying to tell him it’s the way he speaks but he doesn’t understand and he downs that believe it and tells me I’m over sensitive which to me is invalidating my feelings. I’ve brought this to his awareness after an argument and he just thinks I’m bringing this up because i hate being wrong so it’s a tit for tat thing but I’m just expressing how I have felt for a very long time. Am i wrong???
I am going through something very similar.
How are you dealing with it
You are not wrong for feeling this way. My husband does the same and does not realize how damaging it is to my mental health.
It’s caused me depression and lowered my self confidence and I feel like there is a difference between trying to help me and being belittling by the way you speak to me and my tone as if I am the problem. He won’t stop till I admit I am the problem and change. I think there is a way of helping someone without making me feel like shit . He refuses to change he says that if I don’t act childish or I don’t act up then he won’t have to make me feel like this meaning it’s me who’s the problem.
I am/went through the same thing. There is a 17 year age difference between my boyfriend and I. We have been together for six years and the first five years of our relationship he was constantly belittling me and it felt like everything I did was wrong. I walked on eggshells for five years. This last year he threatened to beat me so I moved out. I felt more confident and like I had control of my life but I ended up moving back in with him.