I need help understanding
I'm currently trying to get my head together for what I anticipate to be a nasty divorce. I am extremely ADHD, and unfortunately have quite a bit of trauma so my mind isn't the "sharpest". I feel like I'm the problem, but I don't think it's all me. I know it's not all me, I was bright and blooming at the ripe age of 19 when I met him. I am now 24 and every last light inside me has almost gone out. Ever since having our daughter, ice changed and this isn't what I want anymore. I feel so so so guilty but I think I am being manipulated. I can never remember things, and he uses this to his advantage. I'm not sure what even to say, I need help sorting my thoughts out.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m going through a rough break up right now and trying to use it to grow and learn to love myself so I can be better in the next relationship. It’s never one persons fault. Have you both talked about going to counseling so that you can find where the communication gaps can be bridged?
I’m experiencing the same thing from the males point of view right now. I got really depressed and insecure and started to neglect her badly and I honestly was so wrapped up in my head I didn’t see it happening. What I mean is I pushed her away like that and she had an affair. I would have much rather her talk to me about it or try to go to therapy with me. The betrayal of someone that I trusted with my life and my kids life was very traumatic. Just saying, if you have to be done be honest about it please don’t cheat on him. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
@ahoulihan i relate to this, not to the divorce but the way you think its your fault. i wanna remind you that that's not always the case, we often overthink things into making the other person in the right because we can't accept the fact that they did sometihng bad. humans are humans, we make mistakes. but as long as you recognize that it wasn't all your fault or that you were the problem, it will give you enough space to move on.
if you ever need to talk about ADHD i have it pretty severe too so im always free to chat. lots of love <3