Isolation

Just when I feel at peace with a certain aspects or concepts with my separation and divorce it ends up hitting me all over again. Isolation is terrible and now really isnt really the appropriate time to try to make friends. Don't really have those skills yet but talking to people has become easier but I keep running into desperate feelings of lonliness and endless scrolling of my phone for human interaction that doesnt exist. I keep making posts like this to ease the pain a little I suppose. Life is so vastly different and it seems so horrific most of the time. I didn't know exactly how much I leaned on her for social interaction and general wellbeing and purpose. I have one person who has stuck with me and does a daily check in and unfortunately I keep getting unfounded anxiety that they will dissappear out of the blue. Cannot afford the time or cost of therapy yet. Im so ready to see something positive. The divorce wasnt mutual. She hit me out of the blue and within a couple weeks completely left my life.