The pain of not moving while they move on
Me and my ex fiance broke up almost 3 weeks ago. In that time we got back together for a little and tried again. This recently ended again with her saying she doesn't know what she wants and doesn't think she is in love with me or if she was ever in love with me but she says she still loves me as a friend. She wants us to be friends. Now honestly I've started to realize that she wasn't the woman I thought she was and I've seen an ugly side of her during this whole break up but I still want to be with her. The hardest part of everything is that I have not been able to stop crying or get anything done because I am so depressed but she is out having fun with her friends and moving on already even though our break up is still so fresh. It hurts to realize that this is truly making her happier. When we first broke up she did the same thing but then she told me that at night she cried and drank herself to sleep because she too was hurting but I think after our second attempt now she is over me. It hurts to think that she has moved past when I am stuck in such a dark place. She is coming over today to pick up the rest of her things and talk so that we can try to become friends but I am unsure of what to say. I've writen 3 letters to her, one trying to get her back, one when I was angry and sad, and another when I had accepted the fact that I do not belong in her life but I want to be. I don't think i'll be reading any of them but hopefully we can talk and the words can truly come from my heart.
I feel completely broken, I don't think i even want to be fixed. The only feeling I feel is fuck it. That's it. I only feel fuck it. That's literally my responde to life now, just fuck it. whatever happens happens. I truly don't care. It's weird. It's freeing but scary at the same time. I have lost control. I can't even control my self anymore. I have lost so much and i feel like I am about to lose everything. and the funy thing is, nobody cares. I am so close to just giving up and nobody cares. I am barely surviving, I am dying here yet nobody cares. Its funny how many people can walk past a crying man and not give 2 shits. I feel invisible. I don't matter to anyone. I could just walk away from life completely and only like 4 people would notice and they all would be better without me. I might leave
@SirPounceALot I care. Hold on, sweetie. Don't give up. You are an important person in this world and you are awesome. X
Last night was awful. And now today I feel like absolute shit, physically and emotionally. It's nice that you guys say you care but really we are all just strangers. Strangers don't care. The high of my night last night was telling a random girl that I thought she was very pretty. I made her smile and that was nice but then I wondered off. We were in each others lives for 30 secs. All relationships are fleeting. I'm sick of being alone. I'm sick of feeling like a human piece of shit because the one person who said she would never leave, left like it was the easiest thing in the world. And she told me leaving truly made her happier. Made her feel like she could breath again... well now I'm suffocating
Young single mother dealing with child's father who doesn't want to help support the baby. I'm trying my best to stay positive working and taking care of myself and my daughter. It's so hard for me to not want to be spiteful. How can a man actually boy choose running away to live with his parents instead of growing up to become a man. A man who helps support and build his family not run away. The saying is Mamas babies daddy's maybe? Right. I'm 22years old working almost 40 hours a week. Not a lot of family support trying not to give up. I need a word of advice. Besides child support because once I have a day off I'm taking him to court. I feel pathetic for it I know people say he's never gonna change get over it, but it's easier said then done. He's 25 and has two kids. I struggle between needed the support with babysitting an financial responsibility and the fact that I didn't grow up in a stable home 😔
Why can't I give up hope?!?!!?? Literally everyone I've talked to about it says the same thing. "That's bullshit you 2 were both head over heels in love for each other, she just said she wasn't to protect herself". Literally everyone agrees. I few of my friends now have a bet to see who can guess when she'll contact me again!!!! This fucking sucks. I want her back so badly and I can't give up hope. I know she still loves me, she just can't be with me right now which is shit. I feel like once the family stuff she is going through blow over she will come back. I fucking hate this feeling of hope. I can't lose it. I've lost everything else but I can't lose hope
@SirPounceALot
Oh wow your getting deeper into your dark hole :( what's going on why can't you stay in that town why you loosing your apartment I thought you were working on getting extra money why not 2 jobs or ask family to help you out or look for someone to move in to help you why didn't you stay with that girl why walk away if she smiled at you why didn't ask her how her day was or how she is going you walked away from that why you could have made another friend or who knows what's around the corner till you try don't punch anyone in the face it will only cause you more problems and trouble you need the work you need the money I'm sure you'll figure something out so you can finish your schooling off and stay in the apartment till then all the best I hope you can figure it all out and you don't need your ex not a low shellfish rude mean stabber like that there are plenty of nice wonderful females out there like that one that smiled at you after you gave her a compliment
@BrightRedFlower2322 I talked to my dad today and I might be able to stay but it's going to be tough. And I feel bad taking handouts from my family. It's just been tough being alone. I feel so self destructive yet at the same time I am making progress. I might be able to stay, I started talking to another girl online. I've talked to a few girls at the bar. Like I am putting myself out there. I just think I'd feel bad if I did anything though because honestly my heart still belongs to her. It sucks. I wish I could just go sleep with a slut but I'm not that type of guy. I still feel loyal to her even after she broke up with me. I feel dirty just talking to these other girls
I'm starting to hate my life. All i do is work, sleep, exercise, smoke and drink. I have nothing to look forward to anymore. I am exhausted but there is nothing about tomorrow that looks promising. I don't want to go to sleep and wake up to another day of work, sleep, smoke, and drink. Nothing is new, nothing is exciting. I'M BORED!!!! I wish I had something to be excited about.
I just woke up crying and immediately then my sister and then my mom called me. 2 phone calls back to back holding back tears. I'm drowning here. It's been 2 weeks of no contact and honestly I believe she would reach out by now. I truly thought she would text me atleast to see how I'm doing. How could she just go from talking to me everyday to nothing?!?!!? How could she just cut me out of her life like that?!?!? I don't understand how you can be so close to someone and then just walk away like it was nothing?!?!?! Each day it gets harder and harder to not text her. I'm afraid I'm going to slip up soon, extremely soon. Last night I got to the point where I told myself that the next night I was sober and not at work I would text her... I know I shouldn't. I just miss her so badly. I guess I just had my hopes up that she would contact me
The only person I cared about doesn't care about me anymore. The only person I love is happy without me loving her. The only person I wanted in my life wants nothing to do with me. I miss her so much and I don't think she even misses me anymore. I'm just another ex to her, another person she cut out her life, just another name on a list to her. I miss her so badly. I understand that she left so she might now miss me but she said she still loved me as a friend and cared about me.... then why hasn't she atleast checked in on me. She knew how badly she hurt me yet she can't even give me a courtesy "how are you doing" text. She wants nothing to do with me now. I feel so worthless again. I feel like trash. I was thrown away like nothing. Tossed aside because I was inconvenient. I was abandoned. I feel like human garbage
I might text her tonight. At this rate I will break my promise to myself. I can't hold out any longer. I just want to atleast see her name pop up on my phone. I miss talking to her. I miss everything about her. I crave her in my life. I miss her so much I would do anything to have her back in my life
I can't stop crying
Sirpounce....this currently feels like the worst moment of your life, believe me it will get better and better, hang in there man...the best of you is yet to come
